I want to get over health anxiety

[vintage1980]

Hi all,

I joined this website today as I am sick and tired of worrying myself about getting cancer/having a stroke/getting Alzheimers early etc. I've 'had' every disease under the sun. Two months ago it was ovarian cancer, two weeks ago I was convinced I was in the early stages of Alzheimers and about five years ago I was convinced I had HIV even though there was practically no chance of this.

At the moment it's lung cancer. The only 'symptom' I have is a dull ache under my rib cage and towards my back but only when I'm in certain positions. Everywhere I turn I seem to see cancer charity adverts on print or on the television. A part of me actually believes it's a sign that I have it (I feel so stupid just writing that but it's true). This particular illness was triggered by watching a black comedy called Breaking Bad, where the male protagonist has terminal lung cancer. I'm so pathetic. The NHS ad on the television about lung cancer has made it so much worse. Every time I have a little cough I get so worried. And I'm sick of worrying. It's almost taking over my life. I know deep down that the back pain is either due to the bad mattress I have or due to a fall I had about a month ago and has potentially misaligned me (back pain sort of coincided with the fall). I went for a 4KM run yesterday and was absolutely fine, was able to sprint towards the end - surely a lung cancer sufferer would have difficulty?

I feel really ashamed of myself as I have no reason to be anxious. I have a good job, I'm in no debt and I recently got engaged so currently planning a wedding - I shouldn't be feeling like this! Also, two people I know recently got diagnosed with ovarian cancer and it's REAL for them. I should be counting my blessings instead of typing things into google and looking for a word like 'lymphoma'.

Can anyone relate? Or has anyone managed to get over a similar situation? I'm so desperate for answers. I haven't registered with a GP in my area yet but I plan to do so (to get counselling rather than numerous scans) - I'd just be interested in getting input from people that know what it is we all go through.

Thanks so much for reading.

V x

[zippy]

Yes i can relate to this. I have convinced myself over the years i have had lung cancer (chest x ray clear), ovarian cancer (pelvic scan clear), brain tumour (mri scan clear), stomach cancer (sigmoidoscopy and endoscopy both clear). I have had myself having every cancer possible and had an abdominal scan and that was clear had bloods done on numerous occasions and all normal.
When i am in my anxiety state i think every advert is a sign or if i hear someone talking about cancer that i have it. Also i think if i don't let myself worry that it isn't just anxiety or my m.e that it will tempt fate and the time i don't worry it will be something serious.
I am currently getting tingling/prickling sensations mainly in my arms, fatigue, aching all over, nausea and generally feel ill and i am trying to stop myself from going to my doctors for about a month and then if it doesnt by that time i will go.

[Rugrat]

I have health anxiety and panic attacks this morning I was sure I had skin cancer even though
My mind was telling me it's not true so I went to me doctors and she told me I am ok only then
did I start to feel better in the last months I have thought I have got cancer of the bone and prostate
and mouth and skin and bowel cancer has for the TV adverts they are driving me mad too when the adverts come on I turn the TV over so I don't have to see them
I am sure you do not have lung cancer
if I were you I would go and see my doctor and tell them everything you are feeling
and get help and not suffer in silence there are 1000s of people like us you are not alone at all

[southey]

Hi V, I'm like you in that 'my latest illness' is lung cancer. I havent had the Alzheimers one yet but certainly convinced my self I had HIV 10 years ago!!

For us health anxiety sufferers unless we treat the cause of the anxiety we will just bounce around various illnesses worrying each time and making our lives miserable.

Those adverts on the tv used to send me into a right state but now I really don't mind them and they are quite comforting to me. Knowing if you find something early it's much more treatable

I am coming out of a nasty bout of health anxiety with the help of Citalopram and CBT therapy. What terrified me a month ago is now manageable and I have since come to this site and feel well enough to try to help others.

I'm sure a visit to your doc to discuss treatment for your anxiety would benefit you and while there even though you almost certainly have nothing to worry about there is no harm in relaying whats worrying you and get their opinion.

I think you are fine and I would love to be able to run 4 km so your doing well

Steve

[Rugrat]

Yes i can relate to this. I have convinced myself over the years i have had lung cancer (chest x ray clear), ovarian cancer (pelvic scan clear), brain tumour (mri scan clear), stomach cancer (sigmoidoscopy and endoscopy both clear). I have had myself having every cancer possible and had an abdominal scan and that was clear had bloods done on numerous occasions and all normal.
When i am in my anxiety state i think every advert is a sign or if i hear someone talking about cancer that i have it. Also i think if i don't let myself worry that it isn't just anxiety or my m.e that it will tempt fate and the time i don't worry it will be something serious.
I am currently getting tingling/prickling sensations mainly in my arms, fatigue, aching all over, nausea and generally feel ill and i am trying to stop myself from going to my doctors for about a month and then if it doesnt by that time i will go.

We all seem to want to stay away from our doctors I think part of it is fear and some of it is embarrassment but we just worry and worry our self's to death I am just coming around to the
idea of just go and in 10 or 15 minutes the fear is gone

[willous1]

Hi all,

I joined this website today as I am sick and tired of worrying myself about getting cancer/having a stroke/getting Alzheimers early etc. I've 'had' every disease under the sun. Two months ago it was ovarian cancer, two weeks ago I was convinced I was in the early stages of Alzheimers and about five years ago I was convinced I had HIV even though there was practically no chance of this.

At the moment it's lung cancer. The only 'symptom' I have is a dull ache under my rib cage and towards my back but only when I'm in certain positions. Everywhere I turn I seem to see cancer charity adverts on print or on the television. A part of me actually believes it's a sign that I have it (I feel so stupid just writing that but it's true). This particular illness was triggered by watching a black comedy called Breaking Bad, where the male protagonist has terminal lung cancer. I'm so pathetic. The NHS ad on the television about lung cancer has made it so much worse. Every time I have a little cough I get so worried. And I'm sick of worrying. It's almost taking over my life. I know deep down that the back pain is either due to the bad mattress I have or due to a fall I had about a month ago and has potentially misaligned me (back pain sort of coincided with the fall). I went for a 4KM run yesterday and was absolutely fine, was able to sprint towards the end - surely a lung cancer sufferer would have difficulty?

I feel really ashamed of myself as I have no reason to be anxious. I have a good job, I'm in no debt and I recently got engaged so currently planning a wedding - I shouldn't be feeling like this! Also, two people I know recently got diagnosed with ovarian cancer and it's REAL for them. I should be counting my blessings instead of typing things into google and looking for a word like 'lymphoma'.

Can anyone relate? Or has anyone managed to get over a similar situation? I'm so desperate for answers. I haven't registered with a GP in my area yet but I plan to do so (to get counselling rather than numerous scans) - I'd just be interested in getting input from people that know what it is we all go through.

Thanks so much for reading.

V x

You sound exactly like me. At the moment I am convinced I have early alzheimers. I thought I had HIV ECT for years. And in the last few months have been sure I have had mouth cancer, a brain tumour, heart failure, going blind, going deaf etc. I just want it to stop as it is affecting work and home. Feels like no one understands. Relief to know other people going through same thing in a weird way and hope we can all get some comfort knowing were not only ones. My doctor can not even convince me I am fine and have been to a&e for stupid things. However these symptoms feel SO real. Pm me if you want to chat. Sean

[Dzt66]

I want to get over this too. I have been to the dermatologist for cancer, saw a cardiologist for arrhythmia, had my thyroid tested, an x ray of my shoulder for pain there, a brain MRI for MS. My latest is I think they need to do a spine scan to rule out MS. But if I can look at it in light of all my other negative tests it seems ridiculous. I really want help. I need a good book to read or something. I am a Christian and have tried praying about this and giving it to God. It is so much easier said than done.

[saab]

For anxiety sufferers I can highly recommend Dr Claire Weekes 'Self Help for Your Nerves', and Richard Carlson 'Stop Thinking Start Living'. Books like David Burns 'Feeling Good New Mood Therapy' and J Bourne 'Anxiety and Phobia Workbook' have sections on health anxiety and CBT exercises to help you think more logically.

I have suffered from huge health anxiety in the past due to having lots of ectopic heartbeats (pvc's) every day for 8 years. At times I have been paralysed by anxiety, afraid to move because I was convinced I was about to drop dead, afraid to sleep because I believed I would die in the night. I was agoraphobic briefly, leaving the house only to take the kids to school. I am still suffering, but much better than I was.

The above books have helped a great deal and it really is a question of thinking too much about stuff and not being able to think logically about our health.

Some of the exercises are things like making a list of how you feel and then writing a logical response:

1. I'm going to die because my heart is missing beats -

I have seen several doctors who are not concerned. I have had all the tests and been told it is benign.

2. I can't cope with the panic I feel -

the feeling will pass, it always does. Let your body do it's thing, relax and float through it.

3. Physically I feel awful, there must be something seriously wrong with me -

how you feel doesn't always mean there is something wrong with you. The physical symptoms like chest feels tight, shaky, are more to do with anxiety than anything else.

This page gives more examples. It's not my page BTW, I just came across it today as I was looking for a CBT exercise as an example to show you all:

http://iveronicawalsh.wordpress.com/...tive-thoughts/

The thing is, we need to challenge our automatic negative thoughts and realise that it is our distorted view of the world is causing us to be anxious about things. Another thing for me was learning to accept uncertainty. I don't like surprises, I like to plan and be organised. Accepting that I cannot control my body/health has been very difficult.

I hope this all helps. If you are anxious about health, remember you cannot always control your body 100% (though healthy diet, no smoking etc. will help) but you can start working on the the thing that you can do something about - ie. the anxiety.

[Jules147]

For anxiety sufferers I can highly recommend Dr Claire Weekes 'Self Help for Your Nerves', and Richard Carlson 'Stop Thinking Start Living'. Books like David Burns 'Feeling Good New Mood Therapy' and J Bourne 'Anxiety and Phobia Workbook' have sections on health anxiety and CBT exercises to help you think more logically.

I have suffered from huge health anxiety in the past due to having lots of ectopic heartbeats (pvc's) every day for 9 years. At times I have been paralysed by anxiety, afraid to move because I was convinced I was about to drop dead, afraid to sleep because I believed I would die in the night. I was agoraphobic briefly, leaving the house only to take the kids to school. I am still suffering, but much better than I was.

The above books have helped a great deal and it really is a question of thinking too much about stuff and not being able to think logically about our health.

Some of the exercises are things like making a list of how you feel and then writing a logical response:

1. I'm going to die because my heart is missing beats -

I have seen several doctors who are not concerned. I have had all the tests and been told it is benign.

2. I can't cope with the panic I feel -

the feeling will pass, it always does. Let your body do it's thing, relax and float through it.

3. Physically I feel awful, there must be something seriously wrong with me -

how you feel doesn't always mean there is something wrong with you. The physical symptoms like chest feels tight, shaky, are more to do with anxiety than anything else.

This page gives more examples. It's not my page BTW, I just came across it today as I was looking for a CBT exercise as an example to show you all:

http://iveronicawalsh.wordpress.com/...tive-thoughts/

The thing is, we need to challenge our automatic negative thoughts and realise that it is our distorted view of the world is causing us to be anxious about things. Another thing for me was learning to accept uncertainty. I don't like surprises, I like to plan and be organised. Accepting that I cannot control my body/health has been very difficult.

I hope this all helps. If you are anxious about health, remember you cannot always control your body 100% (though healthy diet, no smoking etc. will help) but you can start working on the the thing that you can do something about - ie. the anxiety.

Great post!

---------- Post added at 12:32 ---------- Previous post was at 12:26 ----------

In his book, Overcoming health anxiety Dr David Veale talks about a bicycle that pulls to the left. You have to steer it slightly to the right in order to make it go in a straight line. These health awareness ads on TV are not intended for people with HA, they are for people who are not sufficiently aware of their health; they are for those whose bicycles pull to the right.

That said, he doesn't believe in avoiding watching these ads or avoiding TV programmes set in hospitals, quite the opposite in fact. He believes that the more you are exposed to illness and death the less you will fear it.

[saab]

Thanks. If I had the money I would pay for Claire Weekes book to be given away at the counter of W H Smiths. It's CBT before the word CBT was even invented. It's a life saver.

As Shakespeare says, "there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so". We are so much the prisoner in a jail of our own making - the negative thoughts that lead us to anxiety, depression, terror. It's our thoughts, our interpretation, that turns a headache into a brain tumour, a harmless skipped baet into a fatal arrythmia. We drive ourself crazy with "What if..."

Then the compulsive neagtive thoughts become a habit, as does the constant checking of the pulse, and the scanning of the body for the slightest feeling of discomfort. Drop a plate? That will be MS. All logic goes out the window.

I strongly recommend people who, like me, constantly expect a catastrophic outcome to any event, to read some CBT books. It's easy to think, "Get a grip...pull yourself together" - but if it was that easy, you would have done it by now. Start helping yourself by doing something practical about your anxiety, other than sitting there wringing your hands, going over the same thoughts in your head.

Once you are aware of your 'cognitive distortions' - ie. how your mind runs away with itself - then you can work on having a more rational response. It could be MS - anything is possible - but actually, it's very probably not.

I have spent 8 years half-expecting to die basically, and it hasn't happened yet. I still have bad days, when the missed beats are bad, but I am much more aware now of how I got myself into this anxiety state - I did it by ignoring all medical evidence to the contrary and thinking I was ill despite the views of several cardiologists.

You can either wait for the health anxiety to pass - which it may do as your life goes on and your attention shifts to other things - or you can start working on it.

This is a good website on anxiety. It's a good place to start:

http://www.anxietynetwork.com/helpcope.html#helpcop1