Why won't this lymph node go away? :(

[anxious848]

Really? 10 years!

My anxiety lies around the fact that I can see the actual node. If I couldn't, I'll be honest I think it would have bothered me a whole lot less.

The ultrasound tech obviously couldn't tell me what she saw (in Canada). But, she said she was 'surprised to see that I was asked to come back' and as we talked through my anxiety laughed at the idea of cancer.

I really wish I didn't get worked up so easily. My heart was pounding the entire time. She was probably the nicest ultrasound tech I'd met. Usually I leave feeling worse afterwards. Obviously the radiologist still has to review but her comments did help. She said it had probably been there for even longer than I noticed.

I would just like to move on from this, like a normal person.

[nivekc251]

You will ,don't worry.

[anxious848]

I wanted to post an update to those that may have similar worries as I do.

My follow-up ultrasound was fine. No need to follow-up visit with the doctor.

If there is anything I've learned from this, the months and months of worry has taken away precious time from my family - and what I mean by that is being 'present' for them. Instead, I spent a ridiculous amount of time worrying about what the lymph node meant, googling incessantly and ignoring my doctors when they said it was "not concerning". The only one who mentioned the word "cancer" was me.

Health anxiety is a terrible thing to live with. It takes away your ability to live in the present and enjoy the things around you. Though it will be something I am sure I'll struggle with for some time, I don't want my worries to take precedence over the things that matter most - my family. After countless worry after worry that has turned into "nothing" I need to start trusting my doctor again. I need to realize that a random pain here or there is likely not a death sentence.

My New Years Resolution: take control of my life again...and enjoy it. Being fearful of everything to come just sucks the fun out of it.

Thank you so much for those that took the time to respond to my initial posts.

[NancyW]

Thank goodness this worry is over for you.

What happened to the lymph node? Is it gone? Still visible? Permanently enlarged ?

[anxious848]

Thank goodness this worry is over for you.

What happened to the lymph node? Is it gone? Still visible? Permanently enlarged ?

Thank you so much, Nancy. It is still visible to the naked eye. The ultrasound tech mentioned I've "probably had it forever" so my assumption is she meant a shotty lymph node. My doctor mentioned that to me as a possibility the last time I saw him as well.

I will need to ask him the specifics whenever I have an appointment. But I'm kind of thinking if no follow-up is needed, perhaps better not to ask. 😊