After Depression, Left Unmotivated and Fatigued?

[I Don't Get it!]

Hello all

I feel as though my Depression and G.A.D/Social Anx. are in remission at last. When the occasional wave of irrational fear or lowness comes over me I think I can cope with it.

However, the one thing that hasn't left me is this overwhelming feeling of not wanting to to do anything. I feel totally unmotivated to do anything and when I try to force myself to do stuff (like housework, exercise or taking unwanted items to a charity shop) I find myself either making excuses not to do it or starting to do it but getting fatigued very quickly and giving up. It's a vicious circle because I'm now putting on weight and getting more and more unfit as time goes on.

I remember in Cantopher's "Depression: Curse of the Strong" book, he says to leave the hoover in the middle of the room when this happens and don't overtax yourself in recovery. Not much chance of that!

I'm posting this for two reasons:

1. To see if anyone else feels the same and

2. In case anyone has been through this and come out the other side and has a top tip to share!

One thing I've thought of doing is starting really slow and giving myself just one different task to do each day for a week, then the next week I'll add another task and so on until I'm doing more. The task won't be "clean the house", it would be "clean the bathroom" - a small manageable task that I can do.

Typically, I've decided that I'll do this from next Monday (even before I had my breakdown I was a chronic procrastinator).

I should imagine that this feeling is quite common after depression?

Any thoughts?

[AntsyVee]

That’s pretty normal for depression. Sorry to break the news, but you’re just going to have to power through it.

[lior]

Hey, I have been there

'powering through' was advised to me too and it didn't work for me.

The key for me was self-compassion. It's the magic ingredient. It took me a long time to build it, but that's what took me through the process of daily living, and eventually lifted me out of depression.

I never was a procrastinator - sure, with some things, but in general not. The way I operate is that I follow my mood. I know that I have certain things I need and want to do. I tune in to my mood and see which of those things I'm up to. Then I catch the mood - like surfing a wave - I seize that flicker of a moment so that I can get stuck in to a task. It really works for me.

The slowly adding tasks thing doesn't work for me, but it does work for other people.

I make sure I give myself treats if I do something. I'm very much about the carrot, not the stick. If I want something, I'll see if I can get myself to do something less fun before I give myself that thing. Or if I manage to get something done, I'll actively congratulate myself. At the time I found it hard to get out of the house, I would make extra sure to congratulate myself every time I locked the front door behind me. I still do that on difficult days!

Another thing is making fun that which I don't like. So I only hoover now with 00s R'n'B now because it makes me sing.

These things really did make a big difference to me and I can assure you that it does pass! good luck!

PS google what you can about procrastination and why it happens... often, understanding the root cause of something can help you figure out how to break the pattern.

[pulisa]

Tim Cantopher was my psychiatrist many years ago and yes, he does recommend this approach but the trouble is it's not very practical especially when you have many family commitments. I think trying to reach a balance which will keep you mentally stable and functioning is a good option because it is important to motivate yourself to complete routine tasks and give yourself a sense of achievement.

[Bigboyuk]

Basically it's saying take baby steps (don't run before you can walk!) Like I have a tiny bed side table I go to a peer support group and after you have spoke you have to set a goal my goal for that week was just to clear that tiny bed side table off and polish it and put my clock and candle back well did I do it? If I had set my goal clean my whole bedroom then it would have been a disaster so get a white board make a list of small manageable tasks and as each one is completed tick it off the list and say well done to your self you will start to feel better ATB

[I Don't Get it!]

Thanks all for your replies, I feel better just reading them.

As I suspected, it's pretty normal and everybody has to find their own way to deal with it. All your replies were so different and I recognised things in each one that I can relate to and use. Very helpful, thanks again

[emmegee]

I'm going through the same.
What I tell myself:
1. This will pass. Be confident you will feel better in time.
2. One day at a time. I don't have to enjoy my day, I just have to get through it.
3. I am not alone. Many other people go through this and feel the exact same way.

[I Don't Get it!]

Aww, thanks emmegee, sorry you're going through the same (although I keep reminding myself "this is nothing compared to how I felt 6 months or a year ago"). You're absolutely right, telling myself that everything is temporary is something I do a lot and it really does help.

This weekend has been particularly odd, I've found myself feeling low or anxious/fearful for short periods of time, like a couple of minutes. Then it goes away and comes back again an hour or less later. It's weird. This morning when I woke up I felt really down and tearful for about 2 minutes and that happened several times in an hour until lunchtime then I felt OK again.

There's nothing particularly stressful going on in my life right now, I can't understand what's triggering it. Oh well, as Ms Weekes says ,"accept, accept, accept!"