Hi, this is my first time posting something. I needed to share and get some feedback/support. I have always suffered anxiety - stressfull life events and what now seems like a permanent on swith of my adrenals Anyway, my mother died 3 years ago and i have had a lot of health anxiety since as well as feeling fairly unsafe generally, I have not really had to "face"anything too challenging since and think I have avoided things that stress me out. I now have a situation that is REALLY stressing me out, I went for a smear test, i had convinced myself that there wsa "bound to be something wrong" - I had calmed myself down and accepted the normality of it and that I would deal with it IF there WAS something wrong. Well, I have not even had the results yet but was told I had a polyp, nothing to worry about apparently, but I AM worried as it means maybe the hospital (they did say the Dr would remove if small enough). I need to visit the GP to find out, but the thought of going to hospital, the results (although i understand that they are 99%) harmless are just now what I want to be doing and feel like the anxiety is too much and I can't do it, but I want to do it, but kind of want to avoid ANY unpleasantness, which I now is ridiculous, because life happens and sometimes its challenging. I feel so raw and vulnerable and wonder how best to take care of myself, yet not worry toooooo much so that I make myself more anxious than necessary. I think I need a mum right now - I am 40!!


Plus, nurse, that was lovely said after I told her that at 27 I had an ultrasound and was diagnosed with a uterine fibroid, that was nothing to worry about. 3 years ago I had a burst chocolate ovarian cyst that resulted in an A&E trip that resolved itself and the recent polyp she suggested I press my GP to take care of my gynaelogical health. I know that she was not suggesting anything was wrong, but more to do with linking all these events to just take care of this area of my body. BUT....I have no experience of what this means I should be doing, checks? etc Again, I think I need a mum, guidance, reassureance and lessons in self care that dont render me going over the top with anxiety about WHAT IF.....any advice, words, experiences welcome x