hi honeybee,

not sure how your feeling at the moment with regards this situation, but i can relate 100% with you.

the thing is though i dont go along with BLAMING BLAMING BLAMING them and equally you cant BLAME yourself, can you try really hard not to go down this route? the other thing is is that it is your anxiety100% that is making you like this, i am currently having therapy and me and therapist have gone over ALL of this, and they dont want you to focus on your other half and they dont want your other half to change, they want YOU to help yourself to change!!!! while your focusing on HIM your not focusing on YOU!!!!!!

this is a big mistake as he can go out into the world so why focus on HIM!!!! get yourself better and then you can think about your relationship, this isnt just me saying this this is what my therapist has gone thry with me, also when we went together because i didnt want to go in on my own, i started complaining and moaning about him and i was told NO you cannot focus on him and expect him to be nice to me, at this time mark had had 3 weeks off work(some was days off thru a sick note off the doc to look after me! and some were holodays) and if i went to my cleaning jobs he COULD NOT move out of our house and i was phoming him to check every 10 minutes or so, and then when i came in he couldnt go ANYWHERE!!!!!!

now things are only a bit better, and mark is being less miserable at the moment, but over them 3 weeks he hardly spoke to me and he was sooooo unhappy, i'm sure youll say'yes but he was there' well he was but only in body and that 3 weeks were some of the worst ive had in the 10 years id known him, he just seemed to have given up on me. but the therapist was saying ' well tuff, just get on with it yourself' and it worked!!!!

if they leave us they leave us and then we'll have to deal with it then, but up until then you have to get back into today and do the best with today really, this thinking about the future is damaging so try your hardest not to do it, and you might see you start to feel better, i know its easier said than done coz im there myself but you just have to pull yourself out of it bit by bit

all the best love emmaxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx