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Thread: Absolute terror and despair in the mornings

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2018
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    Absolute terror and despair in the mornings

    How does everyone else cope with this? I feel complete terror and an overwhelming desire to die every morning. I don't know what to do.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Posts
    533

    Re: Absolute terror and despair in the mornings

    Quote Originally Posted by Greycylinder View Post
    How does everyone else cope with this? I feel complete terror and an overwhelming desire to die every morning. I don't know what to do.
    Mate early in recovery completely I hated iT! It is actually a reaction to how you feel - as you are counting the days down to the 4-6 weeks when anti depressants kick in. So everyday you feel let down that you are not fixed. :-(

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2018
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    94

    Re: Absolute terror and despair in the mornings

    Thanks Ben. Have been on these for about 6 weeks already. Surely I should be slightly better by now..... Don't know how much longer I can hang on. 😧

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
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    533

    Re: Absolute terror and despair in the mornings

    Mate honestly my first time with depression took me 2 months before I felt anything and then even that was hard work - are you doing any self help? Exercise? Swimming helped me a lot! Vitamins? High magnesium and fish oils? Sometimes we can be sitting there waiting for energy and we don’t get nothing and then that keeps the negative thought cycle going!


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  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
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    657

    Re: Absolute terror and despair in the mornings

    This is so me in the morning and has been for a long time now

    The feelings I can’t cope are killing me now

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2018
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    94

    Re: Absolute terror and despair in the mornings

    Hi both,

    Thanks for replying. I am doing little things to help myself. Doing a half mile run every other day, meeting friends for coffee when I can and making sure I get up instead of lying in bed. Trying to distract myself. They are upping the Quetiapine a tiny bit too. I spent a week in the Maytree Respite Centre last week and it was very intense and I feel very raw and exposed. Finding shopping and lots of people difficult but I keep trying. It is like fighting World war 2 every day.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Posts
    533

    Re: Absolute terror and despair in the mornings

    Hi greycylinder

    At some point I looked atMay tree but if you have family friends etc around you then they ask you to try and avoid these centres as they can be pretty intense and not the best to attend.

    Guys I can honestly say I have been there 3 times where you are! It honestly does get better. The problem we have is we want immediate reaction, immediate fix.

    It’s humans it’s how we opearate we see something we fix it unfortunately your brain is complex and is ultimately learning and adapting everyday...

    My first time it took 4 months to get my self ok and that was with mirtazapine quetiapine and loads of other meds. Ultimately it was this little steps that helped, I went swimming everyday.

    Mornings are tough and that’s down to something called scanning.

    As soon as you wake up your desire to be better means you scan yourself for dangers or feelings that are abnormal and that sets off the anxiety.....

    I am reducing my quetiapine now I am on 45mg mirtazapine and 300 quetiapine with propranolol and diazepam PRN.

    I am Managing work which is difficult but one foot in front of another is sometimes how you need to live life....

    It will get better i promise


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  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jan 2018
    Posts
    94

    Re: Absolute terror and despair in the mornings

    Thank you Ben. That is exactly what I do in the mornings. I hold my breath and wait for the misery and anxiety to kick in. I worry about never being able to go back to work etc. I would like to get up and have something positive to do but it is not too taxing. I am looking at volunteering for a couple of hours a week.

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