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Thread: obsessional negative thoughts

  1. #1
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    obsessional negative thoughts

    hi there..

    you are the only ones I can mention this to as i'm worried for the consequences. I have written a few times that i have that word suicide always in my thoughts and i know this is quite common. But I am continually questioning myself, what if i want to do it and i'm just not admitting it to myself. I know this sounds so daft, but it is driving me nuts. I've written it all down and my answer has always been no i dont want to. I'm just afraid i will want to. I even went so far as to hold a knife to my wrist to prove to myself i wasn't going to or dont want to do it!! is this the final straw? do you think i've gone mad!? I have been doing so well too!! i'm worried if i tell anyone i know that they will take me straight to the hospital!

    please help,
    Lisa
    xxx

  2. #2
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    hi Lisa,

    No, I don't think you've gone mad hun. We all have negative thoughts running through our minds. I don't think about commiting suicide but I have quite often thought about death, etc but that doesn't mean that I want to die, does it? The key to getting rid of the negative thoughts is by actively trying to replace them with positive ones..

    Sarah

  3. #3
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    Hi lisa,

    i'm prob not the best one to answer this, but i would try not to think about these negative thoughts because you know that is all they are as you have said you really dont want to do it it is just your mind is working overtime trying to work these thoughts out, try and accept you dont want to do it so you must have sume positive thoughts to make you think that focus on them and all the reasons you have to be here for, sorry that is prob not much help take care,


    kairen x

  4. #4
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    Hi Lisa
    Sorry you feel so confused right now darling, you are most definately not going mad.. your thoughts are exactly that and that's where they will stay, in your mind, i am no expert, so will let someone else help you in that area, but keep in touch, try (as hard as it is) to relax a little, maybe a bath or whatever, any slight distraction, i'm sorry i'm not too good at this, but do keep in touch and by the by, no-one will take you anywhere, especially to hospital. take care, and as you said you have been doing well lately....and it will continue very soon xxx

  5. #5
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    hi lisa

    i can def relate to what you are saying, i have had anxiety in the past but this time i have had suicidal thoughts which really scared me.

    i think it was the sheer desperation that i thought i would never get better and i didnt want to be like it forever.

    i know deep down i would never do it to my kids as a friend of ours commited suicide in nov, and my oldest child 9 was devasted and couldnt understand why someone would want to do that, so i know it would screw the rest of his life up and thats something i def dont want for him.

    remember suicidal thoughts are i feel different from being suicidal.

    i actually think ive turned the corner after 3 long mths, my meds seem to be kicking in finally and i can see an improvement which is a great releif.

    if you ever get that bad go to your nearest a and e and beg foe help.

    i also put a knife to my wrist which resulted in my husband hiding the knives, but if i was really that serious we have lots of drugs in the house, so i knew then i couldnt do it.

    things will really get better go to see you gp, and get some meds if you are not on any, it took an increase in my meds to feel better.

    take care and remember these are just thoughts.
    love Jane

  6. #6
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    Hi

    I know what you're talking about. I've had similar thoughts of thinking about death/suicide but not acting on them. I just try to distract myself by doing something nice and they easily go away for me.

  7. #7
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    thank you for replying..
    I know they are ridiculous thoughts and i think they stem from that feeling of being fed up of being like this.. I dont know the difference of suicidal thoughts and being suicidal and dont tell me either or it'll give me something else to obsess about.. I guess if the thoughts scare me so much, its a pretty safe bet i wont do it..
    I am on meds and they have made me a lot calmer. its just the thoughts are taking a while to budge.
    Lisa
    xxx

  8. #8
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    Hi Hun,

    Please don't worry it's amazing how strong our thoughts become huh! Then you get into a vicious circle as you start feeling anxious about the orignal thoughts you had been having and It all starts to spiral out of control.

    When you feel yourself having these bad thoughts take some deep breaths and tell yourself they are just bad thoughts nothing else and they can't and won't harm you. Then try distracting your self with anything to take your mind off it

    I know when I have been at my lowest I thought do I really want to bother anymore. Then I thought how selfish it would be to my family and felt angry for thinking like that.

    It just takes time patience and small steps.

    Take care and no one will take you away! If the irrational thoughts get to bad. perhaps a visit to your G.P see if they can help. Remember we are here to help you through this bad patch to!

    Love PIP'S XX

  9. #9
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    Hi Lisa

    You are not going mad as others have said and these are just thoughts. Having obsessive thoughts does not mean you are going to act on them.

    I've been suicidal and there is a difference because when I've felt like that I have wanted to do it. I have actually wanted to die.

    I think there is a world of difference between having the thought and worrying that you might act on it - and you have already proved to yourself that you don't want to act on it, and actually feeling suicidal because you want to die.

    Remember this is just an irrational thought and thinking something does not mean you will act on it.

    Hope you are ok tonight.



    Karen



    It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.

  10. #10
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    Lisa

    You havent gone mad at all, if you had you wouldnt know about it and certainly wouldnt be writing on here and telling us about it. You are testing yourself to the limit and i am sure a lot of us on here have. You are not alone in how you feel and i have being there so dont do this alone.

    There is no easy cure to this it take determination and hard work but i am sure with our help you can get through this hun.

    You have so much to give so dont let that you hinder who you really are and what you have.

    Keep talking and being honest and we will help you. Not many people are as brave as you to admit how desperate they are feeling and that in itself shows pure strength.

    Love Sal xx


    Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.


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