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Thread: What's going on?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    34

    What's going on?

    Hey I'm fed I'm 19 years old male and have had depression and anxiety for 6 months! During the last 6 months I have been seeing a therapist for cbt and been on celexa an antidepressant! With both of these my depression and anxiety has greatly improved and I am able to get on with my day much more easily!
    It all started after I was I'll for nearly a year and coming out of my illness I got gay thoughts! This escalated into thinking I was gay and couldn't be with a girl! I have been with a girl for Nearly a year Howard and I love her greatly! I want to be with her forever! I have had sex numerous times so I have had erections! (Sorry) I watched gay porn when I was younger and am wondering whether these thoughts are hocd or am I gay! Which scares me!
    Also can you get bored of having sex with your gf after a while is that natural or what's that mean! I just wanna be reassured that I'm straight and that I love my gf!
    Pls help! Thanks

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    1,837

    Re: What's going on?

    Firstly, only you know if your straight and if you love your gf... we cant answer that...
    There are other threads on this forum that cover the same things your feeling, take a look at them, they may help.
    Yes you can get bored of sex sometimes with the same person, especially when your young...perhaps you need to spice it up a bit... it doesnt mean you dont love your gf.
    Sounds like you are doing better though with the meds and cbt...talk through any concerns with your therapist too.
    __________________
    .....when all is said and done and we come to the end of our lifes journey, posessions will have no meaning, and the only important questions will be 'was i loved and did i love enough?'.....

  3. #3

    Re: What's going on?

    yes you can get bored, and im sure if you were gay you could become bored also.

    You dont need reassurance, if you were gay you would know! not just trying to convince yourself you are. and you would be okay with it! the fact that you are scared that you are just proves to me that you arent. being gay isnt a bad thing

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    545

    Re: What's going on?

    There's not much I can really say, this is a common intrusive thought. Be careful to see it as OCD unless you have compulsions. Alot of people make the mistake of labelling it as ocd just because.

    Anyway for one Stormsky is right only you know if you are gay. I know this probably scares you but don't be afraid. If you are gay then it isn't the end of the world.

    But if this merely is a obsessive thought then thats somewhat trickier to come to terms with. Watching gay pornography doesn't necessarily mean you are gay. I once had a counsellor who told me she believes there is a scale and at one end is 100% homosexual and the other end is 100% straight. She said she did not believe anyone is 100% either way. Even though people tend to believe they are. I would say if you find your girlfriend attractive and have sex with your girlfriend then you are attracted to girls. You seem to be just focussing on the negative of being attracted to males rather than looking at it objectively and seeing that you are attracted to females.

    I hope this makes you feel better xx
    __________________
    When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me." ~Erma Bombeck

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Posts
    191

    Re: What's going on?

    Hi,

    wow - it sounds like you're going through a really difficult time at the moment, I'm sorry you feel this way.

    I have been suffering from OCD thoughts about cheating - at one point, I was THAT certain I had cheated on my boyfriend and forgot (which is impossible) and even confessed it to him!

    I went through a similar thing to you regarding pornography but of the same sex, I honestly thought I WAS gay and that no one would be able to accept that. the thing is, that the thoughts have that much of an impact on you that you know in yourself they're not true! as for the gay porn back when you were younger, dude, you were young! everyone goes through things like that and experiments differently.

    I know that this is the last thing you'll wanna hear, but you will only ever know yourself if you ARE truly gay.

    bare in mind, thoughts aren't things.

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