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Thread: I think i am dying

  1. #1
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    I think i am dying

    I need some help. I sit here and i am really worried whats going to happen to me. I have this cough itch in my throat, I know its lung cancer and although my x ray has come back clean, I do believe that they have missed something. I know nobody will believe me, but i just know. I know my own body. I now have a painful shoulder. Stabbing pains another sign this is what i am dreading. you can think these pains they are there and i cant take it anymore.

    I do not want to die in a hospice i love my children and husband i am no good to them like this, and i cant see things getting better, I do believe they will be better off without me. I have not been a good mother or wife for a long time since this all started.

    People say this is my anxiety, but you cant put a cough there you cant make up a cough everyday all day, now this shoulder pain stabbing pain that comes and goes.... i cant see a way out i do not know what to do i am lost very lost.
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    a life lived in fear is a life half lived

  2. #2
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    Re: I think i am dying

    Quote Originally Posted by selphie View Post
    People say this is my anxiety, but you cant put a cough there you cant make up a cough everyday all day, now this shoulder pain stabbing pain that comes and goes.... i cant see a way out i do not know what to do i am lost very lost.
    Yes, you can. If you were to read about just how extreme some peoples somatoform disorders had got, you would be surprised. I won't talk about them on here because they could be a trigger for some people, but lets just say they saw things that you wouldn't believe you could influence and they were put through therapy and helped.

    You can also focus more than you would if you didn't have an anxiety disorder and make them worse in terms of how they affect your anxiety.

    I think you are doing a lot of catastrophizing here. You know you've had the all clear from trained medical professionals who have used incredibly expensive equipment that they use everyday all day long to check for what you fear and they didn't find anything.

    How you are talking about yourself is classic in anxiety, I've done it so many time myself like you probably have before now.

    Your children love you, so does your husband. You may not have been able to do all the things you would have liked to but you are still who they love and they will just want that old you back again. They wouldn't be better of without you and I think deep down you know that, they would miss their mum.

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    For free Mindfulness resources, please see this thread I have created to compile many sources together http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=168689

  3. #3
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    Re: I think i am dying

    Do you smoke ? Its amazing the amount of fears the mind plays over and over, the xray showed its clear it would pick it up you cannot miss it it comes up as a dark patch on the lungs, which you most certainly didnt have or they would of seen it even if its a tiny weeny little patch theyw ill investigate further try and get help for your anxiety ask your doctor to be refered for Cbt Therapy Try and convince yourself that you havent got it and you have a annoying cough but dont have cancer, Relax and chill and be a good wife and mother

  4. #4
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    Re: I think i am dying

    Quote Originally Posted by MyNameIsTerry View Post
    Yes, you can. If you were to read about just how extreme some peoples somatoform disorders had got, you would be surprised. I won't talk about them on here because they could be a trigger for some people, but lets just say they saw things that you wouldn't believe you could influence and they were put through therapy and helped.

    You can also focus more than you would if you didn't have an anxiety disorder and make them worse in terms of how they affect your anxiety.

    I think you are doing a lot of catastrophizing here. You know you've had the all clear from trained medical professionals who have used incredibly expensive equipment that they use everyday all day long to check for what you fear and they didn't find anything.

    How you are talking about yourself is classic in anxiety, I've done it so many time myself like you probably have before now.

    Your children love you, so does your husband. You may not have been able to do all the things you would have liked to but you are still who they love and they will just want that old you back again. They wouldn't be better of without you and I think deep down you know that, they would miss their mum.

    Thanks so much for replying. I do understand that they have checked and found nothing, but after reading up cancer can be missed, and is missed on x rays..... So i can be one of these people. This pain in my shoulder is here, and it is here for a reason its getting worse, its coming everyday in the same place, so i know its something. I cant function, and i feel i cant go on.

    I do not know what to do. I am so scared xx

    ---------- Post added at 10:53 ---------- Previous post was at 10:50 ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by tmckenzie-orr View Post
    Do you smoke ? Its amazing the amount of fears the mind plays over and over, the xray showed its clear it would pick it up you cannot miss it it comes up as a dark patch on the lungs, which you most certainly didnt have or they would of seen it even if its a tiny weeny little patch theyw ill investigate further try and get help for your anxiety ask your doctor to be refered for Cbt Therapy Try and convince yourself that you havent got it and you have a annoying cough but dont have cancer, Relax and chill and be a good wife and mother
    I did smoke, and as soon as this all started i quit and not had one since. I read up on the internet about this woman that mothers cancer was missed 3 times on a x ray and she had cancer, so what does this tell me.

    I am going to the doctors, but last time they were horrible to me and told me there was nothing they could do for me, I cried and she was so nasty xx
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  5. #5
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    Re: I think i am dying

    The internet is the worst it gives you the horror stories, its like so so so soooooooooo rare to miss it, think all the thousands and thousands of people it does it pick it up for you dont have it all you have it a bad case of health anxiety , the cough could be caused by acid reflux or nasal drip or anything, you dont have lung cancer so please dont think you do relax u have nothing serious

  6. #6
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    Re: I think i am dying

    Quote Originally Posted by tmckenzie-orr View Post
    The internet is the worst it gives you the horror stories, its like so so so soooooooooo rare to miss it, think all the thousands and thousands of people it does it pick it up for you dont have it all you have it a bad case of health anxiety , the cough could be caused by acid reflux or nasal drip or anything, you dont have lung cancer so please dont think you do relax u have nothing serious
    I know this is going to be embarrassing for me, but i have also developed a habit of coughing into a tissue to check. My phlegm, has a colour to it... I know it should be clear but its not it has bits in and its scaring me I am also sure i can see a tiny spot of blood.. I am falling apart. I am trying relax, but things i have are pointing to that
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    a life lived in fear is a life half lived

  7. #7
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    Re: I think i am dying

    If you are coughing a lot, you can get the odd bit of blood from the straining on the blood vessels. Someone else was worried about this a couple of weeks ago and everyone reassured her that it can be from the coughing so it could be the same for you.

    Coloured mucus with a cough can be a chest infection. I have asthma and I used to have loads of colds with chest infections when I was younger and the GP's at my surgery said that was a possible sign of infection and to see them as I would normally need some antibiotics or steroid treatments back in those days.

    There are stories out there of people that the system misses but they are thankfully rare. We know this because every single one of them hits the national media straight away and I think people don't think about this on here. A classic Cognitive Distortion issue there.

    There is no reason for a GP to act unprofessionally and you are within your rights to complain if they do. Or ask to see a different one. You deserve to be treated with respect like everybody else.
    __________________
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    For free Mindfulness resources, please see this thread I have created to compile many sources together http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=168689

  8. #8
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    Re: I think i am dying

    Quote Originally Posted by MyNameIsTerry View Post
    If you are coughing a lot, you can get the odd bit of blood from the straining on the blood vessels. Someone else was worried about this a couple of weeks ago and everyone reassured her that it can be from the coughing so it could be the same for you.

    Coloured mucus with a cough can be a chest infection. I have asthma and I used to have loads of colds with chest infections when I was younger and the GP's at my surgery said that was a possible sign of infection and to see them as I would normally need some antibiotics or steroid treatments back in those days.

    There are stories out there of people that the system misses but they are thankfully rare. We know this because every single one of them hits the national media straight away and I think people don't think about this on here. A classic Cognitive Distortion issue there.

    There is no reason for a GP to act unprofessionally and you are within your rights to complain if they do. Or ask to see a different one. You deserve to be treated with respect like everybody else.
    Not coughing a lot i just have this itch all day everyday that makes me want to cough it just will not go no matter what i do. Its there from the moment i get up till i go to bed. I have no chest infection the doctor has told me that although my phloem is not white it has strange colours in and if i try to cough and then look closely there is a little tiny red spot that you can just see if you look hard enough.

    I wish i knew what to do i really do.
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  9. #9
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    Re: I think i am dying

    Right 1000% you have allergy relux or post nasal drip, nothing else, and the anxiety is playing into it you are checking your mucus for blood to confirm that you have the wicked disease infact you have ocd now for doing this you dont have cancer please please stop worrying and be a mum and a wife again try sleeping with a electric humidifer at night it will help you i have been there where u r but worrying about throat cancer not lung cancer and that ended up bein nothing

  10. #10
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    Re: I think i am dying

    Quote Originally Posted by tmckenzie-orr View Post
    Right 1000% you have allergy relux or post nasal drip, nothing else, and the anxiety is playing into it you are checking your mucus for blood to confirm that you have the wicked disease infact you have ocd now for doing this you dont have cancer please please stop worrying and be a mum and a wife again try sleeping with a electric humidifer at night it will help you i have been there where u r but worrying about throat cancer not lung cancer and that ended up bein nothing
    Really do you think it could be that?. I take pills for indigestion so its not that. What about the shoulder pain tho? and the chest pain? Same place fr days now.

    I really do want to be a mother and wife again, I think my husband will probably divorce me soon. I cant seem to move on. I sit in the same place all day i am having panic attacks, I feel so alone in all this.
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