No choice but to go out. Help, tips?

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Hi all. I have been agoraphobic for 20 years, virtually housebound in all that time. Last November I was discussing some symptoms I had with my DR and he gave me an urgent referral to my local gyne hospital. I got there by taking seven 5mg of diazepam. I had to go back and took four 5mg of diazepam. After that the Drs would only prescribe me with two 5mg diazepam for each trip.

During one of the last trips to outpatients I started to have quite a lot of panic symptoms. I don't know why. Maybe because there were a lot of people there? Maybe because I had to wait a long time for the hospital transport home? Anyway, I managed to cope and the transport came soon after so I got home OK.

I had lots of tests and it was found I had cancer of the womb lining and had to go in for a hysterectomy. The morning I went in I took three 5mg of diazepam. I managed to stay in hospital for two nights (Three days.) On the way home I kept thinking, 'I'm outside, surely the diazepam have worn off by now. I'm not covered by them any more.' I just tried to focus on the journey (I do enjoy the ride there and back.) and managed to get home OK.

The trouble is I have to go to another outpatients appointments in a couple of weeks for my follow up appointment. (Discuss if I need further treatment, etc.) Although I managed to stay in the hospital previously it was in another department completely. I keep getting memories of the panic in my mind and I'm really worried about going back. Would anybody have some advice about what I could do? I know I would be described the two diazepam again but obviously they are starting not to work. I go with my mum already. (Thanks mum. ) I have also got in touch with Steps To Wellbeing but they haven't got back in touch with me again yet. (Probably all the snow.)

Any help/advice will be greatly received!

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Anyone? Could really do with some advice please.

[ana]

I'm so sorry to hear about what you've been going through. It must be really stressful. :(

I had a bad setback 2 years ago and was all but housebound. It took me over a month to get myself out of the house properly, and I managed that through gradual exposure. Basically, you set yourself a goal as to how far/long you want to be out of the house and repeat that for several days until your anxiety levels are manageable. Once they are, you take it further.

It's not easy, but gradual exposure, paired with some positive thinking and therapy/medication is the way to go.

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Thank you so much for your reply ana.
I did gradual exposure to go to my local shop. Unfortunately I don't have the luxury of trying that way with the hospital. (I get hospital transport, usually arranged through my doctors surgery.) I don't have anyone with a car I could go with.
They haven't sent the date of the follow up appointment to me yet, and I know it shouldn't(Avoidance.), but that makes me feel better!
Thank you again for your help.

[ana]

Could you go with a friend, someone to get into the car with you? I don't know if hospital transport would be happy to take another person apart from the patient, but it's worth a try?
Something I found useful when having to travel long distances for doctor's appointments was to look around for a nearby shop, somewhere to go to to treat myself for a job well done once I've managed to get to the doctor's. That way, I'd have something to look forward to once the appointment is over. By doing this, you're actually turning an event which you don't look forward to into something you might look forward to because you're not just seeing the doctor... you're also taking yourself out. Maybe you can find a cafe or something where you can just sit and have a cup of hot chocolate or meet a friend...?

I'm happy to help