After taking propanolol and citalopram for 4 weeks now I have finally started to feel like me again. I have laughed, really belly laughed for the first time in months, I look at my kids and burst with love/pride when before I felt so sorry for them having a mother like me.
Last week we received some extremely bad news and I just selfishly think why now?! I've always been the strong one and now I have to be strong for people when I feel like I'm just holding on myself.
Finding myself worrying about things...my family, my health, the future. I just want to enjoy life, Iove, laugh etc. The mental torture is seeping back in and I don't know how I'm going to cope with things.
It's my son's second birthday tomorrow so I'm hoping this will be a lovely distraction.
Just have to get this out otherwise I'll be getting quite anxious tonight and In could do with sleep.
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