Anxiety caused by socialising - Thinking aloud

[cactuarjon]

Hey, I'm mainly just thinking aloud here, but do feel free to chime in.

Right now I'm anxious. I'm at work. I'm forced to be here because society says I have to work to earn a living. I can't live without a wage. Bills, food, rent - these all require me to be here today.

But I don't want to be. The office where I work is quiet. But I would much prefer it to be quieter - ie nobody here at all. Ever.

I'm not anxious for fear of making a fool of myself. I'm not anxious from worrying about what people think of me today. I'm not anxious or worrying about people laughing at me.

I am anxious because I am having to 'see' and 'talk' to people when i really really don't want to. There is nothing more to it than that.

So having said that... Is there a difference between social awkwardness caused by anxiety and anxiety caused by social awkwardness? Is my anxiety making me way over think things right now?

What do you do when you really don't want to be within 100ft of people on any given day?

[zo100704]

I’m not sure about social awkwardness but I feel a lot like u, like I wish I didn’t have to go to work and go through this daily internal struggle. Some days are better than others. However, most days all I want to do is to be left alone and people not realise I’m there so I don’t have to go through the torment of my inner thoughts controlling me. “am I going to blush” “are they going to notice” “what Iif they ask me something I can’t answer” “why do they want to talk to me”

I wish I could be free of these thoughts and be like some of my confident colleagues. How I wish I could be like them 🙁

You just have to push through each day. There is no other alternative, as like u said, u have to pay the bills...