NMP Book Club: The first rule of Book Club...

[Jacsta]

Superficial maybe, as swgrl says, but is that not partly down to her low self esteem as well. She doesn’t see herself as attractive at all, this is the first guy that has looked at her since she has been terminal….is part of it shock?
This book is based on Hazels thoughts...deep down in our own thoughts how much superficiality is there? Yes we may love people deep down, but I think most people will have thoughts on hot or not...even if they don't openly express it...

---------- Post added at 15:52 ---------- Previous post was at 15:49 ----------

I think all of those little moments were humanizing moments and reminders of the group's youth and innocence coexisting with this maturity that you can only get by going through something as serious as cancer.

And I think that's what makes this book so inviting

[AnxietyDJ]

That's a really interesting point... I didn't even really think about it when I read it. I think that comment on her part really reminds us that she is only a 16 year old girl even though she has been through more than most adults have. And although she is mature for her age and suffers, it serves as a reminder that Hazel really is just a teenager who still cares if a boy is hot or not. I'm not saying all teens do, but maybe that was the purpose of that portion - to just remind us that this isn't adults we are dealing with, but honestly kids!

And then once we remember that they are just two kids who are still living in this awkward teenage phase, for me it makes the book that much more powerful. Adults are more equipped to handle tragedy and suffering than kids are. The adolescent brain is not matured until 25! So here are these two kids who are going through more than most adults have ever gone through in their lives. For me, it really humanizes them and makes the depth of what they are going through that much bigger.

I do get being annoyed by it though - who isn't annoyed by superficiality!

---------- Post added at 10:37 ---------- Previous post was at 10:33 ----------

Now that I start thinking about it, there are a lot of little moments like that to remind us that she is still just a kid in many ways - the ANTM marathon (Which I loved because I used to binge watch that show all the time and referred to it as ANTM with my friends), the skeptical eye they took at the support group, etc. I think all of those little moments were humanizing moments and reminders of the group's youth and innocence coexisting with this maturity that you can only get by going through something as serious as cancer.

Excellent points!

Yeah I totally agree... Being forced to grow up prematurely, but still clinging to those moments of youth.

Definitely noticed those little reminders we get throughout; this is a 16 year old girl, who, although in many ways is more life-hardened and aware than most adults, still shows a glimmer of the insecure and immature teenager that illness has tried to take away.

[Gatsby]

Topic 1

Of course it is, relationships are founded on similarities, it's just that in this situation the similarity is that both of them have cancer. The need for a crutch for both of them is apparent, even though both are strong in there own ways, i feel like the sudden way in which they both let their walls down to mean completely the opposite of what they've been portraying to the people around them. Each needs to be understood and listened to and who better to do so than someone who's going through exactly what you've been through.

Topic 2

I think in this position you have to give people the choice whether to be in the line of fire or not. As she says her parents are too invested, but then why so easily let Gus into her life!?Her inner turmoil "i felt like i was committing an act of violence against him, and i was" (sorry if not verbatim am quoting from memory), is brought to the forefront. I think this quote is made redundant by her being doing the things she said she couldn't. I'm not saying she should close herself off to people, but to me her words show the typical confusion and changeability of a teenage mind.I also feel it's kind of selfish, i prefer Gus's coping mechanisms!

Topic 3

There are a lot of places where i can compare my life with those of the characters in the books, i've been a teenage girl, so i know what it feels to crush after and be with a guy who is so dreamy and perfect that it makes your heart hurt, everything is perfect and you are slightly blinded by it all to see the reality underneath (my first love wasn't a cancer sufferer, he was just a huge douchebag!) I've also had loved ones pass from cancer, so i know how it feels to be one of those people who are hit with shrapnel, and in all honesty that part of the book annoyed me, i've lived being lied to about someones health, and it's not nice coming late to the party and finding you've missed all the best bits. It's not brave to deny someone a last chance, and i feel what John Green was trying to do in that chapter was make everyone feel how brave of a person she was. I pitied her naivity, but that kind of naivity only comes with youth, and it's hard to remember at times that they are only teenagers.

Forgot to mention, i will read everyone's points through later and join in the conversation when i have more than five minutes!

[AnxietyDJ]

Thanks Gats, that's awesome

Just a reminder to everyone to keep going with the book (if you haven't already)... If you can aim to finish by next Tuesday evening (29th July), please

[Annie0904]

Topic 1 Yes I think the fact that they both had similar illnesses helped their relationship a lot. I guess it is similar to us here on NMP in that it is so much easier to talk to someone who understands what you are going through and their relationship developed from this.
Topic 2 I think I may have looked at this a bit differently to others as I see this as showing that she is caring for others and doesn't want to see them get hurt.
Topic 3. To me cancer is something very scary and frightening and I think reading the book has shown to me that in the worst case situations you can still have fun and enjoy the life you have left. Reading it was a positive experience for me (even though I shed lots of tears reading it). It has also made me want to visit Amsterdam as I have never been before. I have started looking at city breaks there Isn't it funny that a book which is mostly set in USA with only a couple of days in Amsterdam is making is want to go to Amsterdam and not USA

[Jacsta]

I vote for an nmp meet in Amsterdam

[Catherine S]

Hi Annie, yes that's a different take on it for sure...the fact that it affected you more because of the HA angle, but i'm happy for you that it maybe put things into perspective a little too and lightened your HA load so to speak.

It seems we all agree about Amsterdam, we'll have to arrange to all meet up at one of our airports and go over for a few days...wouldn't that be fab!

ISB

[swgrl09]

I vote for an nmp meet in Amsterdam

[Catherine S]

Lol, I obviously had the same idea and posted at the same time

ISB x

[Annie0904]

I vote for an nmp meet in Amsterdam