Frightened to go out but do it anyway? Have you ever just gone for it?

[jillybee40]

20+ years mostly homebound (safe zone just outside of my house) with Agoraphobia, not been in a car either.
Apart from all the essentials I wish I'd get comfortable with travelling in a car with hubby driving, sometimes I think I should just go for it and visit my daughter and Grandchildren who live 20 mins away (which feels impossibly long distance in reality).
Have you ever just gone for it?
Doubt I'd get past the end of the road really and after so many years of being at home I think I'd be in a bit of a state which I wouldn't want to put on anyone..then there's getting home again.

I'm a Mum with grown up children who need me to visit them at times, be helpful etc. I try to compensate when they visit me but it's not the same

[Phuzella]

Yep I think going for it is the only way . Years ago I ran across a beach

[Clydesdale Epona]

Just going for it is my professional, when I'm scared of something I generally make it a mission to force myself to go because its the only way, sometimes of course there will be circumstances of things you're just not ready for, but on Monday I packed my mini backpack full of things bit the bullet and we drove 8 hours(4 there and 4 back) to take my brother back to Uni and now I'm going on another mini roadtrip tomorrow , today I also bit the bullet and rid a pony for the first time in about 2 months, I think if you're feeling like a chance then go for it, worse case scenario if it gets to much you just drive back its only 20 mins x

[ana]

I've had situations where I had no choice but to go for it. I'd struggle going to work, for example, but I'd still do it because I had to. Sometimes going through with it would leave me with a sense of accomplishments whereas other times, it'd leave me feeling defeated and deflated. I suppose it all depends on whether or not the thing you're doing is something you really want to do.

[Ditapage]

I know this feeling, and I know how strong anxiety gets when you just "go for it" but I can't ever say there's been any time where going for it wasn't worth it. I might come home tired but it makes going out the next time easier. I believe NO EXPOSURE = NO CURE, but applying it is a different story. I'm at the point where watching people on TV, out by themselves, makes me think "whoa how do they do that?!" I put myself in their shoes and I can panic just doing that. I've also done exercises at home while panicking where I was forced to stay in a room as if I were out and couldn't get home. It brought on all the anxiety symptoms even though I was "safe" which proved to me the mind really is a bitch. And that's where our battle is. The physical body is just taking its cues from the mind.

I find the more you do, the more you can do. There really is no right time to try. I think you have to go and feel the fear and live through the worst of it to overcome it. There's unfortunately no other option. The more I've run, the worst I've felt, the harder it was next time. I am trying to do it myself, just by being mindful when I go out. Taking my mind off the physical feelings and off ME, and noticing flowers, colours, etc. it can be done

[jillybee40]

Thankyou for replying..the no exposure = no cure is a very good to thing to think about and I totally agree but I'm a coward and will try the smaller steps first, it's a start but really wish I literally would just go for it. I'll be back thanks again

[Antonio2301]

I'm in pretty much in the same situation as yourself Jilly.
I started with agoraphobia aged 30 and just turned 44.
I have got over it before twice in that time .June last year , I had a set back which has now left me in the same situation as yourself. How did I get over it before ? After nearly going crazy indoors for years I had a friend on nmp who also suffered with agoraphobia. I lived in West Yorkshire at the time and she was in London. We arranged to meet halfway and just go for it .I can honestly tell you that it cured me of agoraphobia. It was very difficult, dont get me wrong. I had to keep telling myself that a panic attack wont kill me and it was only thoughts .
I'm back in the same the boat again though since June and finding it a real struggle this time. I've had 6 sessions of therapy, fortunately my doctors surgery is only the next street away . The anticipation of doing it is actually worse than doing it , working yourself into panic before you do anything . Im just working my way through exposure atm. I know I've just gone for it before but this time around the fear of being too far from home petrifies me.
My therapist sent me some good info on exposure which I've uploaded to my dropbox and also scanned something I was given at a session with her. If you'd like to download it , I'll put the links here for you .You will overcome it just as I will soon enough I hope.
Antonio

https://www.dropbox.com/s/xwxh157uec...osure.pdf?dl=0

https://www.dropbox.com/s/nzolbh23ku...c%203.pdf?dl=0

---------- Post added at 10:01 ---------- Previous post was at 09:15 ----------

I'll keep these on my dropbox account so if anyone else going through agoraphobia wants to download them, they may find them of some help.

[Bonnibelle]

I understand being a mum. I have 3 children, who are between the ages of 11 and 14. I feel guilty for being agoraphobic. I can still do the school run in the car but right now since having a nasty virus I've been too unwell to do that as it triggered an anxiety attack driving last week. Horrible.

I'd say to start with you need to go small, so you set small goals. Don't go all in and do the hardest thing first as that will flood you and set you back even further, trust me I have experience of this. Set small goals like being a passenger to the end of the road then turn back. Do this until the anxiety comes down from say a 10/10 to around a 4. Then push yourself to half way around the block and back, then once that becomes less anxiety provoking move onto the full block etc... Keep doing that slowly. It may take a month or 3 until you get to your childrens houses but you will get there if you start a fear hierarchy and do things slowly.

This is how you build confidence. Going in feet first sets you up for a fall so I wouldn't advise that.

Good luck.
Ju x