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Old 02-10-09, 03:12
NumbForest NumbForest is offline
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 41
i not sure how much more i can take of worrying!!

I have suffered with anxiety for the past 6 years!
For the last i'd say 6 months or so i was getting so much better. I stopped worrying 'what if' and it freed up my life to do so much more! Okay so I still found it a challange to do normal everyday things but not as much of a challange because i wouldn't contsantly think what if I have a panic attack.
Thn two months ago I had a lot of stress going on with my family so my anxiety came back and since then i don't think there has been a single day that i have not worried. The only way i get round it is by being so totally shattered that my brain can' t function enough to worry. This is not plausable though as i cannot be that tired in uni!
I also suffer from contsant dizzyness. I have had problems with my ears which go back years! When I was about 12 I got on a plane to go on holiday and the pain I felt when we were landing was unbareable!!!! My doctor told me that some of the liquid in my inner or middle ear (can't remember which!) had gone hard which is why I felt the pain. Now though doctors are all passing it off as my anxiety saying it is just another symptom of that! Which I know it is not because I get anxiouse becaiuse I am dizzy not dizzy becauise I am anxious!
It is like doctors seem to think that just because I have anxiety I couldn't possibly ever be ill! Which is stupid. Around 2 years ago my dizzyness got really bad and I saw about 6 different doctors before one thought to look in my ear (I had an inner ear infection) the doc perscribed me anti biotics and within a few days I was fine again. That was after suffering for nearly a motnh with having to link arms with people incase i fainted and get lifts up stairs becauise my balance was soooo bad!
Anyway now that all my anxiety has come back again my doctor has put me on buspirone which, although it has stopped me panicing, it has not changed the fact that I am anxiouse and stressed!
I just don't think I can take much more worrying. It feels like I have taken so many steps backards. Now if I am going out I worry that I will have a panic attack which inevitably brings one on but I can't seem to stop myself worrying anout it. So I decided the other day that if I havew one I will deal with it, which I did. However after I delt with it I felt okay for about 5 minutes then I started to think but what if I hand't have delt with it? then what?
I just want to scream!!!! I have started university as a mature student last week and I know that has to be causing me anxiety but right now i just want it all to stop!!
Sorry I just needed to tell people who may understand. Thank you for reading
Samm
xx
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Old 02-10-09, 03:38
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JohnLuke300 JohnLuke300 is offline
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Re: i not sure how much more i can take of worrying!!

Hi Samm,

I have had chronic anxiety for about 33 years so I can really empathize with you plight. As to what came first the dizziness or anxiety well that is kind of a 'chicken and egg' scenario and in my experience it is not always easy to spot the early onset of anxiety because it can come in so many forms. I do agree that although dizziness is an anxiety symptom there are are conditions that can cause it. If you have a history of ear problems hasn't you GP considered it could have flared up again? Regarding panic you did the right thing by being prepared to face it, but then did the wrong thing by analyzing the situation after. You should have accepted that you could cope and move on. By analyzing the situation you only undermined the confidence you would have created by facing it. What you did was accept panic and by accepting it all it can do is what you experienced, it won't be any worse unless you fight it.

Hope that helped

John
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I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

Bene Gesserit Litany Against Fear.
From the book Dune by Frank Herbert
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