Ocd with breast lumps

[yummymommy]

So i have severe ocd with breast lumps. constantly feeling them. every moment my hands are empty, they are at my breast. And even though i feel breast tissues for as long as i remember my breast, my mind could sometimes decide to play on one little normal feeling breast tissue. move it and touch it, until it feels more lumpy from so much poking and prodding, now i have same thing. i'm feeling which is prob breast tissue, soft moveable little thing all the way by my underarm- next to the bone (is that considered breast anyway? , feel many similar things also, but somehow my ocd forced me to focus on this little one and im feeling and touching it, and now feels little more distinct than the others ones. even im 99% sure this is normal feeling breast tissue, i cant shake the ocd out of my mind, i keep on touching and feeling it, and then im like, hey, it feel like little lump. how do i get out of this cycle?????? I cant handle it anymore!
in this past year im had 3 breast exams done by drs. and one ultrasound (for no good reason) so i'm not seeing another doctor! they help to reassure for 1 week. thats it!

just to note: im 27 year old and had more than 10 breast ultrasouonds already, including 1 biopsy of a lump that i created myself by poking and prodding and touching for 3 months until it was a full inflamed lump.

[nicol1333]

Hello,

I too had this about a year ago and have since moved on to prodding other parts of my body (it's a vicious cycle)... I also had numerous tests and FINALLY a nurse told me a good tip. She said that bad lumps feel like the edge of your chin or make a fist and they can feel like your knuckles. Begine lumps feel like the tip of your nose. But honestly it's become a OCD obsession just like I had and I literally had to mentally be present and not allow myself to touch them. It's like breaking a terrible habit. You can do it! We're all here for you.

[Mrschurchill]

Had the breast cancer fear!

I'm now the complete opposite where i can't touch them - I get my other half to check them for (He's obviously not gonna say no! lol) but I can't bring myself to check incase I do find something!

I am 28 and it's so rare for it to happen at this age that it's not worth the hassle. Check them once a month and when you feel yourself going to check them outwith that, do something else to distract you. You can do it!! x

[Carrie8484]

Sorry to hear your OCD is causing you issues with your boobs.
I can imagine how all the prodding about could cause inflammation!
I had a breast lump 2 months ago that turned out to be a cyst. It has started to come back so I'll be getting it re examined soon. Im no longer worried about it now i know what it is.
The surgeon told me, at the time, that you only need to examine once a month, usually in the middle of your cycle when your boobs are more 'normal'.
i'm sure you have been told this numerous times and it probably won't help you, but I understand how anxiety can manifest itself especially over breast lumps. As a woman it is something we do need to do, (check them) but we must not let it take over our lives.
I would try, as hard as you can, to leave your boobs alone. Try going at least a full day without examining them, then stretch it to two days and so on.
Say thins mantra to yourself : 'Once a month is plenty to check my boobs, nothing will change between then and one month's time' Good luck

[Fishmanpa]

every moment my hands are empty, they are at my breast.

I've actually had a woman or two tell me the same thing in my single days... who am I kidding, that hasn't changed! Fortunately, my wife doesn't mind

Positive thoughts

[yummymommy]

For those who dont recognize me yet, i have severe HA, and even more severe HA combinded with Ocd in terms of my breast. last few months its with lumps, nipple discharge etc.. while checking with my doctor 3 times this year already and one ultrasound..
last week when i did breast exam, i felt little pimple ON the breast, (not inside) i just ignored it, because i always have little acne/ pimples over my chest and breast sometimes. when i still felt it couple of days, and looked at it int he mirror, i started getting nervous. its by the areola (brown area) where there are bunch of those little 'bubbles' anyway, so right next to it there is what i see as little pimple, but a drop bigger than the average pimple on my face. im scared to google! please calm me!
i have been to my doctor 3 times in past few months, i dont think i wanna go again, i dont know if its necessary either.

[Scotzil]

Hi yummy mommy,

Please try not to worry, I get spots (pimples) on my boobs a lot and for me it seems to be hair follicles getting a little infection. They can be quite big, deep and painful and last sometimes more than a week. It's really common to get spots there, I get them around the edges of my areolas all the time where the hair follicles are. I especially get them when the weather is warmer.

Give it a few more days and I am sure you will see it start to get better. I know when a negative thought gets into your mind it can be so, so hard to shake it but I really do think you have nothing to worry about.

Sending good thoughts your way,

Scotzil

[yummymommy]

i've been posting several posts regarding my terrible ha in terms of (everything really) but specifically breast. i dont mean to sound repetitious but i cant shake fear out of me for goodness sake! i keep feeling breast 1000 times every min, every sec and even i dont find anything i still feel again. i'm 28 years old and had prob about 10 or more ultrasounds to breast, including a breast biopsy for a self induced lump- literally. being that i cant calm my anxiety at the moment, im thinking of going for breast ultrasound to make sure i didnt miss anything. but i REALLY dont want to go. i hate the fear, and honestly, i dont know how i would get a referral cuz why should i? but if i beg, maybe i'll get one.
how can i calm my fears? and to those of u that say i should stop feeling around, its kind of like saying get out of depression. its a mental- physiological problem.
but sometimes some reassuring ideas and words can help (for a while)

oh, and btw- 4 months ago i felt something like a normal breast tissue, soft movable tissue. for some reason my anxiety decided to play on that and i kept thinking maybe its not normal (even though im 99% sure its normal) being that i felt it so often it became little more distinct like feeling. but thank g-d my mind went off it for a whle and i relaxed. however, its now almost 4 months later and my anxiety still sometimes decided to play on that again. this is what triggered my anxiety again. so now i am worried about it. i have very similar things on other side, thing is its not so distinct feeling there cuz i didnt really play with it.
so my question is, if it would be tumor g-d forbid it would have changed alot by now? (4 months? ) correct?

Please, i beg u- if u read this, please share your advice or reassuring words, - if u have any.
Thanks!

[Gary A]

In 4 months a malignant tumour would exhibit noticeable changes, yes. If you've had the level of testing that you say you have, there's simply no need to be worried.

If you're constantly poking and prodding at an area of tissue, you will cause swellings.

Try to start checking only as advised by your doctor. There's nothing wrong with being vigilant, but there's a difference between occasionally checking something and being completely and utterly obsessed by it.

[yummymommy]

i'm the op..

i forgot to mention that in the last years time i had 4 clinical breast exams and 1 ultrasound exactly a year ago. but i find that the ob/gyn do such a fast exam, its impossible to feel everything.