Therapist calls it OCD: I call it Love

[bubblyblue]

Hi, for about 10 years now I have had this recurring obsessional problem. Although I am currently seeking help for my depression, anxiety and alcohol abuse, one thing I do mention but people seem to avoid to treat me on it is my obsessions. Even when I have not been feeling depressed, I was obsessional. This obsession takes the form of "being in madly in love with a man who is not mine".

As a teenager I stalked a certain celebrity for 8 years, not actually following him around day by day, but from a distance. I was so fixated on thinking we were meant to be together, but he just had to get to know me properly first. Everyone labelled me as crazy. I thought about him 24/7, everyday, first and last thing on my mind, day dream of him, make up stories in my head, fantasise, masturbate, send him txts/calls/letters, write to magazines etc.. you name it, I did it. Since then I have done the same thing but with men I admire in my life.

My current obsessional crush is on an ex-colleague who is practically married and got 2 children. Although I dont work with him anymore, I miss him too pieces, and cry about it all the time. It hurts so bad, I think I am in love with him. He knows I want him, as I asked him once and he rejected me. But I know he is a good person and would never cheat on his gf, yet I still want him so badly. Again I think about him all the time, like I mentioned above. This actually kills me. The intense feelings make me feel weak and upset, but high at the same time.

In therapy/counselling, they have always tended to avoid this issue, and focused more on the depression. Despite the obsessions taking the largest proportion of my thoughts than negative intrusive thoughts. Also I am currently taking citalopram 40mg, which is doing nothing for my anxiety and obsessions.

Does anyone have any ideas on what I should do? Is it even a form of OCD?

Thanks.

x

[finny12000]

bubbly in the midst of your post you said you know he would never cheat on his gf so to me you know you actually have a problem and thats the difference if you never id be more worried.
i reckon therapists think if they can get the anxiety and alcohol abuse sorted then the obessions hopefully will fade away
i done the alcohol and anxiety and i would advise trying to abstain as it has a
powerfull effect on mind and made my anxiety tenfold worse
you seem on rights tracks and good luck
finn x