TY Bigboy, another comment made yesterday really made me put this into perspective. I lost my only child, to serious mental illness, my only child and the love of my life. The stress of watching her disappear into her illness over the course of years was enormous. My "breakdown" is normal, it's the normal response of a mother and the worst time of year because my birthday is coming, anniversary of her passing is coming, then her birthday. Grief has no time frame, it never ends, not the loss of a child. TY for your help!