Back after 10 years !!!!

[absb41]

So as the heading says I’m returning to the site due to feelings of panic and anxiety reminiscent of when I was poorly years ago. I’ve constantly been on fluoxetine in that time and that was increased to 60mg about5 weeks ago. In short I’m a teacher having returned to the profession 4 years ago. I have been given class responsibility although not full time this year. My job share is not having her contract renewed so that’s going to change after Xmas.
My anxiety has been bubbling since September and these last few weeks with observations and parent meetings I felt overwhelmingly exhausted and thought I couldn’t carry on like this hence the dr signed me off for 2 weeks.
Having been off for a few days my head feels clearer my panic and physic symptoms have reduced - helped with propanalol from dr.
BUT whenever I think about work or go to send an email I can feel the stress and panic descend on me.

I kept a lot of the physical symptoms and general panic to myself till dr signed me off. My worry now is returning to work. There is nothing to suggest I will return from sick leave next week but the thought of a year managing like I have the syptoms, sleepless nights, constant working and running a house with hubby etc and expectation of work for me to return and of my hubby for me to return fills me with dread and like I have no choice. I seriously question whether this is the right job for me.
Just wondering if anyone has similar experiences or can offer advice. Thanks in advance .

[Tyke]

Hi absb41
You say you returned to the profession four years ago, but your latest problems date from September this year. Did anything change at that point? Was that when you new about the job sharer's contract not being renewed? Is it that you find full-time too much? Are you expected to go full-time permanently or are you just covering a gap until someone else is recruited? Could you manage on the part-time salary? Does your employer know you have an anxiety condition? Maybe you could come to an arrangement to stay on your current hours and get them to recruit someone else? You may feel pressure to go full-time, but if you've managed up to now and that's worked for you it would be a shame to change all that for something you would find far more stressful.