I am 31 year old male.

My friends are all settled down.
Due to how my dad has treated my mum I have cut him out my life but in doing so I have lost regular contact with my family physically though still communicate by text etc.

I have a problem that in relationships I am always looking for faults.

At this moment of time my girlfriend and I are on a break as her brother doed 6 months ago in a motorbike crash and I have been there for her but I feel my problems in hey head is something she doesn't need to be dealing with at present.
So I have distanced myself.

People think I'm a confident sometimes arrogant male. But they couldn't be more wrong.

I am constantly battling feelings In my head , I am not one to socialise in big circles as like my own space but everyone knows me as an over thinker.

I don't sleep properly, and I am constantly down. When single I will have multiple one night stands for comfort with females yet it bores me and makes me feel lower.

I have been to doctors and prescribed medication yet not taken any of it for months. I have been to counselling but was hypnotherapy and didn't work.

People's comments of me that know me say I worry to much about other people's opinions of me. When I was younger I used to not venture outside of acne was playing up.

I am a good looking guy but would never approach a girl in a club and would be nervous if they approached me to point I'd walk away.

It's effecting my life as this is another relationship that has hit rocks same time as others.

I wouldn't kill myself but I would be lying if them thoughts didn't come I. My head knowing I wouldn't do it because of baby brothers and sisters.

I have just moved near my work for convenience but find myself moving further away from friends and family.

I have just signed up to gym but have to convince myself and provoke myself in going and not worrying about people.

I don't know if any of you have watched along come polly but I am like that man? Always on edge. Always thinking something bad is going to happen. So much so my girlfriend said she couldn't see her and her daughter living with me as I would turn them into a paranoid wreck.

I think I know what's has caused this and put it down to my mum and dad but even confronting them about it would break them up and my family so I'm sitting in it.

Any feedback would be appreciated