My 12 yr old is suffering from anxiety

[marie1974]

hiya i just wanted to add that my eldest is 11 and a real worrier about dieing, cancer etc and he is going to secondary school in september and i am really worried as, we try to bring up our kids to be respectful, well mannered, kind, caring and sensible like my son is but a few kids have told him at school that he is gonna get bullied cos he dont swear and cos he is a goodie goodie and gets on with his work, this worrys him cos thats just how he is, and now he is only half looking forward to 2ndary school. as parents we cant win we try to bring up good kids and then they get picked on for being just that. wot is this world coming too. i worry alot for him cos he is so quiet and sensible at school.

[The Fool]

hi hun,
well um i actually started my panic attaks when i was about 10 and im nearly 14 now so i no how your daughter is feeling.i was taken out of school which for my education prbebly wasnt best but for me it was the best thing that could of happend as i only had to focus on dealing with my panic attaks instead of being bullied about them.i aslo gave counciling a go but it wasnt for me.unfortunatly the only way to get over this as we no is to teach yourself how to deal with it which she will in time but if you ever need any advice im always here to help and hopefully she has some better friends than i did to help her at school.but the main thing is to remember your not a bad parent!you couldnt stop this from happening as you said it runs in your family as it does in mine and many other peoples.help each other with it. ok

charli

[tafflass]

hi lilly-lou
for you, you are a fab mum, some teens do go through this type of anxiety sometime due to puberty hormones etc.
you are doing the right thing by taking action now. the females in my family are sufferers of this nightmare illness also. so i know how you are feeling, my mother, grandmother also my sisters and of course myself.
my youngest sister started these symptoms at the age of 12 or 13 she is now 20 and is still so so bad. the problem we had is she didnt tell us what was happening for quiet some time, leading my mother into turmoil my mother was threatend with prison because my sister refused to go to school, my mum did end up in court and had a £500 fine.
but you have cought this early, by getting her some counceling will help, please try and avoid meds for her if atall possible, help from a councilor may be of great help for her, just keep telling her she is not alone, and her feelings are a natural progression of growing up and its just finding a way of dealing with the thought pattern,
sorry about my spelling not one of my better qualitys lol.
i hope you can find some help for your daughter on this site, and i wish you all the best and your daughter too xtafflassx
ps please dont cry, things will get better, she has you xx

[lilly-lou]

Thanks for all the replies,

I have taken her to the docs today that was a complete waste of time for us but I am going to help her myself after all, I am probably more experienced to deal with it. She has had a really good weekend and been out socialising with her friends and went on a sleep over despite feeling and being sick when she wakes up and getting chest pains, I have told her that a lot of it is probably her hormones and will pass as things start to settle down, maybe its been a build up of end of year tests that have just finished that have started it all up as she doesn't like to disappoint and really wants to do well in them, all I know is that its not easy being in high school and hitting pubety early.

The one thing I know is that she will get through this and I will give her all the help I can.

lilly-lou

[marie1974]

hi lilly u are a fab mum and welldone, bloody docs are useless sometimes. i think u r right and u probably know how to deal with her better. my son 11 is strarting to go through puberty and starting to get spots and stuff and he is always so worried about everything and not wanting to go to school, i worry all the time, i try to keep him strong and positive and make him think that he is better than everyone else who is not being nice etc and hope that spurs him on. goodluck in helping your daughter xxx

[jill]

Hi Lilly-Lou

I am sorry to hear that the gp was a wast of time. When my daughter had her blip our gp sent her to the mental heath team, it was the mental heath team I had problems with, to see this team you have to be, what they call, tear 3, this means, panic, high anxiety across all walks of life.( my duaghters Panic, anx where all around school) I had to fight to get her to see this team, I called the team on the phon and explained, that she was tear 3 at age 3, they did see her, BUT, by the time we got to see this team, my daughter was allready moving forward (getting better) , oohh the team where gobsmacked at her proggress.

We only visited this team 3 times, my daughters decisson, was, she did not need them.

She has been panic and high axiety free now for along time.

Hun, your are doing great with your daughter, encouraging her to still do the things she has allways done, even though her anx is high. I know its dame hard for you right now but she will come thourgh this, with the support of her loving mother.

You take care, always her if you need to chat.

LOVE JILLXXX

[joyce1980]

My mum took me to the Drs when I was a teenager too.

It's in my family but the Drs say it's not hereditary, I think that is wrong!

You daughter will be ok, either med (i know she's young but she may need them as I did and still do) or councelling.

You have not done anything wrong and you need to make her go to school like i was and then i made myself go to work, having time to think about your anxiety makes it worse.

If your Dr prescribes Medication PLEASE DO HEAPS OF RESEARCH FIRST.
Or speak to a fully qulified Psychiatrist.

Drs have a limited knowledge of medication and some are not ok for young people.

All will work out.

[lilly-lou]

Thank you for the kind words you have all written.I can't express how much your replies mean to me, thank you all

[Tom_M]

I had exactly the same problem with my 12 year old daughter, a month or so ago. She's back to normal now, just as cheeky as ever. I think what you have to try and do first is to convince her that the way she is feeling happens to lots of kids and can be just part of growing up. The worse thing she can feel is if she thinks that something as happened to her that doesn't happen to other kids, and she thinks she is different in some way. Kids of today are exposed to all sorts of things that their young minds can't come to terms with. I honestly believe that if kids think their feelings are the same as other kids, they are much more capable of overcoming their problems. It's when you feel different that you start behaving different.

Best of luck, I hope things work out ok,
Tom

[smbljb]

i also had the same problem with my sone (13) about 6 weeks ago with a break and then a repeat last week.

we contacted his school (who had said in prents evening that they had notcied he was very quiet all of a sudden and seemed down) and they have a support team that are keeping an eye on him.

there is also a local team called 0-16, maybe there is one in your area ?

i know it's painful and hard but stay with it - it sounds like you're doing a great job already