Hi,

I am wondering whether someone may be able to put my mind to rest.

I have major health anxiety. It seems that everyday I find something new to worry about. I am in the US and am waiting to buy health insurance so am unable to run to the doctor immediately.

I am 40, but still hope to have children, so a few months ago I started to try to get more in touch with my body and cycles, so I learned to feel my cervix etc. Last period I had just been to the bathroom and I have OCD so unless I am about to have a shower I don't sit on a toilet. This means that I have to use muscles to go, either way. When I tried to insert a tampon it seemed quite difficult so I washed my hands and felt up there and it just seemed that my cervix was lower (probably from using muscles), and I can always feel my cervix, especially during this time of the month and as my fingers are only so long (shorter than how far a tampon goes in then I am sure that it was only this). Once I relaxed it was easier to then put a tampon in, although it still seems to hit the cervix, but then seems to push into the gap between the cervix and the wall, so all is good.

The thing is, when I felt up there the right side of my vagina seemed a little 'in' and bulgy (like a flat lump pushing on the wall), but I think I checked again another day and it has not been there again.

This month I have my period again and I had an issue inserting a tampon so I examined myself again and it was just the same as last time so I waited a while, relaxed and all was fine. I also felt my cervix and opening which I thought felt slightly rough which worried me but I have done that before and felt it again and it is smooth (or at least only feels like puckered lips which I believe is normal, but while I was feeling around I have noticed something else which has really freaked me out.

At the side of my cervix in the gap to the right/back, if I push I feel a small hard protrusion. Like I am feeling a piece of something through the wall of my vagina. If I didn't push it would not really be felt, so it is not my vagina. At first I hoped that maybe it was something in my intestine, but the first time I had felt it, I had just been properly, and it was the same later when I had a shower. I just examined myself again during my shower today and I can still feel it. The other side does not have anything like it. I think it is an inch at most and it seems quite pointy and definitely isn't smooth (maybe two bumps?) It really does feel as if I am feeling a piece of hard fecal matter through the wall, but I am sure it isn't. If I bear down it is more difficult to find it behind the muscle that comes down.

I am terrified at the moment, but I have read about that area, and there are ligaments and muscle, also fibroids can be on the outside of the vagina. Apparently the uterus can fold as well at the cervix, but surely this would be smooth and soft. I do not think I have felt it before, unless I just never worried about it. I just seem to have one worry after another. I can't talk to my boyfriend about it as I have already annoyed him so much about all the other worries I have.

PLEASE HELP...

I am sorry that it is a long message.