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Old 09-01-17, 01:39
Librella Librella is offline
Join Date: Dec 2016
Posts: 5
I feel so alone

I struggle with general anxiety and hypochondria and as I get older I think I might have social anxiety too. I have a few close friends, who I'm grateful for, but they all have their own groups and they can't hang out with me all the time. Sometimes I feel really clingy and like I'm relying too much on them. But I'm becoming more and more reluctant to meet new people. Spending time with people I don't know well is just exhausting and doesn't seem worth the effort. It's even worse during the winter, when my Seasonal depression hits.

It carries over to dating too. I didn't care much about being single through most of my 20s. But now I'm 27 and have never been in a relationship or dated much at all, and I feel like a freak for it. My embarrassment over lack of experience, and my anxiety about meeting anyone new, continues to keep me from getting into a relationship. Yes, I've even turned down dates because of it, so I have no one to blame but myself.
Besides, when I think about having to spend all my time with one person, it sounds horrible. I really like my alone time, maybe I'm just not built for a relationship...pretty sure no one wants someone with my issues anyway.

I guess these feelings are pretty common for someone with anxiety, I just wanted to vent, and see if anyone else feels like this. I really do feel like a social freak sometimes.
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Old 09-01-17, 02:34
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Aiden01 Aiden01 is offline
Junior Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 152
Re: I feel so alone

Hi there! x.
i've been there myself trust me, what i've learned from going to a bunch of groups is that socializing ain't really my thing, i can handle it well if i have to but it's quite tiring, i boast well with a small amount of friends, i've started to accept that i'm just a loner who is also clingly somehow x i often think i'm the biggest social freak there is so you're not alone there either, x

"No amount of regret can change the past, no amount of anxiety can change the future"

"Be gentle with yourself, you're doing the best you can"

"Anxiety is nothing... but repeatedly reexperiencing failure in advance. what a waste."

"If you're going to skip doing something fun because of the possibility of injury yet still get injured by something unexpected, wouldn't you of rather taken the fun risk than the boring yet still not safe one?"


-Used to be Sam Winter-
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Old 09-01-17, 11:26
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SLA SLA is online now
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Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 1,059
Re: I feel so alone

You talk a lot about what you don't want, and paint a very negative picture for yourself.

What DO you want life to be like?
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Old 09-01-17, 11:43
Bigboyuk Bigboyuk is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 560
Re: I feel so alone

Hi I too get very negative about my self so you aren't alone on this and you get to the point where ( I know I do ) where you cant be bothered in going out and it's so soul destroying (: And while some me time is important I have too much me time. So not good Hope you start on the road to recovery soon Cheers
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Old 09-01-17, 12:15
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Beckybecks Beckybecks is online now
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Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 608
Re: I feel so alone

Hi, I too have anxiety and find more and more that I want to stay home away from other people. I think that it's my safe place where I feel comfortable.

When I have to go out I really battle to be anywhere that's unfamiliar or amongst strangers. I never used to be like this so I know that the anxiety has caused it. When I'm out, even at the shops, I get loads of anxiety symptoms, which is why I probably prefer to stay home.

Having said that, I refuse to allow the anxiety to take cmplete control of my life so that I become a recluse. I make an effort to go out and when I do, especially for socialising, I usually find after a while that I relax and forget about the anxiety symptoms, so I know it's good for me.

You're way too young to be a recluse. Yes it's nice to spend time alone but it's also important to spend time with other people. Maybe you should join a club. You might find that you actually enjoy it once you get over the initial anxiety of being amongst strangers. It could even help you with your anxiety.

The saying goes.....A stranger is just a friend you haven't met.......and this is often true
General Anxiety and Panic Disorder for 20 years. Recently returned to South Africa from the UK
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Old 10-01-17, 00:00
Dave1 Dave1 is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2016
Posts: 75
Re: I feel so alone

Hi Libs,

You sound uncannily like me. I'm a lot older, I had similar problems and regretfully I didn't really tackle them. You need to tackle this while you're young - otherwise you'll end up like me! Investigate what resources are available, work out a strategy and seriously tackle your problems.

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Old 10-01-17, 10:34
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Deckard Deckard is online now
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 15
Re: I feel so alone

Hi Librella,

I'm not much older than you, and I have never had any relationship. That really hit me only recently (when I turned 30), although it somewhat bothered me since my early 20's. I can understand that it does not get any easier. First of all, there is the stigma of never having been in a relationship. Then there is the lack of experience. Add anxiety of meeting new people and a general social awkwardness to the mix, and you've got a problem. And I don't know what it is like for you, but I'm putting pressure on myself that 'I have to find someone' or else I'll end up all alone forever. That kind of thinking is toxic, by putting pressure on myself I only get more anxious, which brings me back to not tackling the issue at all. Not that I would know where to begin approaching the problem.

Like Dave1 said, the issue needs to be addressed sooner rather than later. It's good advice, but implementation is difficult, as I'm sure you are aware.
Insufficient facts always invite danger. -- Spock

The whole world is a cage, if you're trapped in it alone.
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Old 10-01-17, 17:45
jamesgdev jamesgdev is offline
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 12
Re: I feel so alone

YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!!!!!!! Just remember you have people here should you need them
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feel, lonely, social anxiety

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