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    Join Date
    Jun 2008
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    289

    Dont know whats real or not anymore

    Hey im Austin and ive been a member on this site for many years...but this time in my life is truly scary...And i thought panic atacks were bad..On the 23rd of august i took marighwana i know what i did was wrong but i cant go back..the night i took it..i had a masive panic atack and fell asleep in the panic atack...what was to come next is 13 days of hell...the first 4 days were the worsti was haulicnating quite heavily....My memory is distorted severly..cant remember a min..from a hour...my vision is distorted...i dont fell real...i have nightmares..i fell my brain has had damiged...i went into the Mental health ward last friday and stayed for 3 days...i was a mess...crying uncontrolbly...nightmares..visions...flashbacks..e ven as a write this mesage things just seem like im not real.my whole life has been a dream..I just dont know what to do...What is my body and brain going through..Have i caused major trauma from a little bit of pot please im so scared...sometimes im psychotic and talk about cuting my brain open to stop whats goin on inside...whats going on someone anyone please HELP!

    Im only 16..things were going so well before this all happend...Im praying to god..then im screaming at him "WHY ME..WHY ME..WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS PLEASE TAKE ME HOME PLEASE!!!!!!!!...........

    im so tired..but the dreams i have are terfiying..leaches crawling all over me...im starting to loose my sanity day by day

    im also sucidal..its so funy..how things can be going so well one day and the next your life is ripped away from you..i looked up Deprsoilzation disorder and it seems to be pretty much what im going through....Depersonalization disorder is one of a group of conditions called dissociative disorders. Dissociative disorders are mental illnesses that involve disruptions or breakdowns of memory, consciousness or awareness, identity and/or perception—mental functions that normally operate smoothly. When one or more of these functions is disrupted, symptoms can result. These symptoms can interfere with a person’s general functioning, including social and work activities, and relationships.


    My family seems not real..i seem not real..my house which was always my safe zone seems unreal..do i need to see a nuroligist and tell him my symptoms..please i just want to get on with my life that was going so well..!
    Last edited by bukendaa; 04-09-11 at 22:38.

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