Discussing Some Topics

[Rick(amateur)]

-Journey 2-

We need a destination to have a journey. The destination can be vague initially but we have to narrow it down eventually to know where we're headed. One of the things we need to determine our destination is being informed of what this world has to offer. The world is constantly changing and, as a result, we must adapt to better thrive in the new environment.

When I was in elementary school, there might be a computer lab if we were lucky. Personal computers were only just picking up and life was quite different back then. Nowadays, we have smart phones that possess more computing power than the computers back then. These technological advances will happen since we, as humans, want to move forward in progress.

These changes are unavoidable so we must learn how they can benefit us. With new technology, some jobs that were popular back then might be disappearing nowadays. We all know about automation that sees some company hiring a lot less workers since machines and robots could do the same work at a lower cost. These opportunities would, as a result, take a pretty drastic change.

What we must do is better inform ourselves of these changes. I'm not saying you cannot pursue opportunities with more competitiveness. You need to be informed to know what you are getting into and, if you have enough passion, you still should do it. Remember that, when you enjoy what you're doing, it's only a matter of time before you rise above all of your competition.

When determining our destination, the information we gather will affect it. I'm not saying that we should pick the easier opportunities when a tougher one seems more enticing. Listen to your gut when you pick your destination and just go do it. When you are young, it's fine to have a rough idea of where you're headed. As you get older, you need to be more specific or you'll wander aimlessly in life.

[Rick(amateur)]

-Journey 3-

To find our destination, we must know who we are. This might sound a little awkward but, for most of us, we don't really know who we are. Society and our family members have expectations for us. Since a young age, we want to please other people and, to do that, we must do what they want to see. This isn't necessarily what we want but we are too afraid to do otherwise.

Doing well at school gets us praise which makes us feel good. Since we like this feeling, we want to keep doing well so we can continue getting such praises. By doing so, we are making other people happy like our teachers and relatives. The real question is whether or not we are happy ourselves. Does meeting other people's expectations bring happiness to us?

We had our own dreams like singers and writers that encounter lots of resistance from our family members. In addition, some of us not only don't thrive in school but also get destroyed by it. If a student is struggling due to the teaching methods, he or she doesn't know that and thinks he or she is dumb. This lowers self-esteem that has profound impact on his or her future.

The main reason why we go to school is to pursue a certain degree or diploma. Getting a piece of paper can take awhile and this time could be used elsewhere. Therefore, it's vital for the young people to know themselves better before they make such an important choice. Not only will they not get the time back but, as they age, learning becomes tougher.

Learning who we are ties in with seeing more of the world. There are beauty and ugliness in this world and seeing things with different perspective helps us by offering more choices. Too many choices can be a bad thing so knowing who we are narrows down the choices. We want to work towards our strength which excels in some fields more than other fields.

Once we know who we are and what we truly desire, we can finally decide on our destination. Wandering aimlessly doesn't get you ahead and time isn't going to wait for you. If you destination requires a degree to open doors, go to school so you can get it. If you don't need degrees, pursue your dream so that, when other people are just graduating, you'd already invested a few years in your pursuit of success.

[Rick(amateur)]

-Journey 4-

Let's assume that we have determined our destination like being a business owner or become a professional singer. We might have a destination but this doesn't necessarily mean that our journey has begun. We all, at one point in life, had great dreams of what we wanted to do, especially when we were kids and believe nothing is impossible, but many of us never go through with it.

The issues lies in the lack of courage for most of us regarding starting on this journey. There are many uncertainties and challenges along the way and these terrify us. After all, we only think about a new destination when we aren't happy with our lives. There are things in our lives we'd rather not have so we desire change. The irony lies in that we might be unwilling to experience the change.

When we start on a new journey, we must abandon our old journey. This isn't always a bad thing but people have familiarity with their old journey. The new destination isn't going to happen overnight and might happen years or even decades from now. The terrifying prospect of the new journey makes people, despite how much they hate it, stick with their old journey.

As a gamer, I like to use a game as an example. Let's say we want to play an adventure game and we just finished our character creation. We then have an open world to explore and we can decide where we want to do. Do we hesitate to begin? Do we fear hostile enemies waiting out there? Or do we charge head first ready to tackle any challenges that might come our way?

The character creation is basically us defining ourselves from our old selves. It's through this process that we determine our new destination. We might not charge head first in real life due to the inability to save and reload if anything goes wrong. Yet, we must remember that, the more we hesitate, the less likely we'll reach the destination.

In addition, we go through life exactly like this. Remember the first time you started a job. You weren't confident in your skills and wonder if you can keep working there. After a year, you're like a veteran and what seemed terrifying becomes something you're comfortable with. That's how we go through life. We go from a terrifying experience to something we can do with ease. Take that first step knowing it won't be as terrifying a hundred steps in!

[Rick(amateur)]

-Journey 5-

Let's assume that we have taken our first step on our journey, a feat many failed to take. We might have taken our first step but this doesn't meant things will get easier. In video games, the start of the games are generally easier with the difficulty increasing the further you go. For real life, it works quite differently where you'll found yourself facing many challenges from the very beginning.

We will encounter resistance from family members and critiques from complete strangers. We will face lots of pressure which constantly feeds doubt into us if we let them. The beginning is often very rough and, for many people, this is also where many gave up thinking they cannot do it. It's one thing to get started but another thing altogether to keep going.

You might wonder why people want to experience a journey where the beginning is so rough. Let me use an example of you getting a 98% on a test. You will feel great and your chances of revisiting everything related to the exam is nonexistent. You might be a good student and check what you got wrong but that's about it. This goes for the journey as well where, if you are doing well, you won't change.

Our society has gotten into a mentality that emphasizes we don't change what isn't broken. If things are going along, we don't do anything regarding it and fail to adapt to situations we never saw coming. If a journey begins easy, we'd think we can complete it with ease not knowing that we are ill-prepared for the challenges up ahead. That's why we need a tough start. We have to learn that things won't get easy and we must work hard for every bit of progress.

Now, why can we not start easier and tackle the challenges later? We have more at stake later so we don't want to take the same risks. Let's say you started a company when you're single where failure would only affect you. What if things went well and you got married along with getting kids? Challenges arrive and you feel pressured since there are more people affected by the outcome of how you do with your company.

I don't think any journeys really get easier later on. There might be greater challenges up ahead. The only difference is you. You possess different skill sets and your mastery of them differs. The more you were challenged at the start, the better you can tackle obstacles and you can take calculated risks as opposed to going into the dark hoping you end up where you want to be.

[Rick(amateur)]

-Journey 6-

Last entry, I talked about the challenges we experience at the start of the journey. These aren't there to stop you but, rather, teach you and prepare you for the unexpected challenges up ahead. Let's say you overcame these initial challenges because you found the reason and passion to keep moving forward. While the journey won't get any easier by much, you at least have what it takes to keep moving forward.

When we go on a journey or adventure, we should enjoy it and have fun. We shouldn't be so goal orientated that we miss out on our surroundings. After all, the journey would be a lot more enjoyable if we are having fun. Instead of feeling like we are doing chores or hard work, we do something we love and the goals will be met with ease and you'll achieve them without even noticing.

The journey will show you the beauty of the world and people who you want to become part of your life. That's why we want to go on these journeys. We won't meet them if we are too afraid to leave our comfort zone. Remember that only you can enter your comfort zone so it's a lonely experience if you dare not step out of your comfort zone.

I'll use myself as an example. I started Dwaan because I wanted to help people. The start hasn't been easy as my website and channel have yet to get much attention. I know these are slow processes so I remain patient and keep working away. It's a steady grind where I can only be victorious if I keep going. Knowing that what I'm doing will help people, I have no reason to give up on this dream of mine.

Along the way, I met with people who joined me on podcast. That hasn't been possible lately with real life getting busy but I'm still working away with the social media to get people's attention without spamming. I also got comments, mostly in forums where I do these sort of journals, and I get the impression I'm heading in the right direction. Progress might seem nonexistent but I'm definitely charting the right course.

Of course, I set goals as to what I want to achieve with my website and channel. However, those goals are secondary to what I really want to do. I won't let the lack of results bother me since almost everyday brings something unexpectedly pleasant into my life. I'm just enjoying the journey best I can and, before I know it, I'll finish a few goals and can progress to bigger goals!

[Rick(amateur)]

-Journey 7-

I want to elaborate on my general idea of a good destination. There are two things destination must have. First, it have be able to support you financial. This might not be financial freedom but you'll enjoy financial stability with the income provided from whatever dream you have picked. There's nothing better making a living out of something you love!

The second thing is regarding how many people benefit from your destination. If all you're focusing on is making yourself happy and fulfilled, then you'll find yourself in a situation where it's still not enough. You are trying to fill a void but you cannot fill it since you constantly want more. Such a situation would see you never happy and that isn't the destination you had in mind.

We have heard stories of rich people who aren't happy. They can afford anything they want and yet this doesn't bring them happiness. Why? It's quite simple. We as humans want to help people out! We get a good feeling when we take time helping strangers. I'm sure a lot of people had those feelings when they volunteered for something that matters. Nothing can truly replace that sort of feeling.

Therefore, we feel more joy when doing what we love also help other people. Let's say you build houses and rent them out. Part of your destination/dream is building housing that are affordable for low income families or students who need places to stay while they go to school. You aren't doing this for the thanks from these people. You are doing it because you know it makes a difference. That is what gives your life a greater meaning.

When you help people, you aren't expecting anything back. You don't need gratitude or thanks. Humans might appear selfish often but I'm certain people, if given a choice, want to be selfless. The environment can have a major impact in shaping who we are. In a selfish society, we naturally become that way. However, we still see selflessness in our society so we mustn't ever give up hope. We can all be selfless if we work hard enough.

We must also remember that, when we purchase something nice, it's great for a few days or months before the feeling is gone. When we help others, we know we made a difference and that feeling lasts forever. You might still remember the smiles of those you help later in life because those moments are priceless.

Let's go back to the example of making affordable housing. Maybe the parents of a family got laid off due to bad economy and not due to laziness or other negative traits. There's nothing more rewarding seeing them get through difficult times and they thanking you later in life because you cared about them first. When we help each other more, there's more happiness and positivity resulting in a better society as a whole.

[Rick(amateur)]

-Hope-

Hope is very valuable because, when we lose hope, we generally give up completely. Let's say we are part of a sports team and we see ourselves at a huge deficit. If we lost hope about a comeback, we won't even play hard and probably wish the match would be over already. No miracle can change that since we have stopped working towards the small chance of a comeback.

For many people dealing with anxiety, depression and other mental illnesses, hope is such a critical factor related to their chances of overcoming their challenges. They need hope to continue the fight until they can be victorious eventually. These battles don't last a few day, weeks or even months. Many constantly deal with this issues for years and hope is often one of the reasons they keep on fighting.

In our society, people facing such issues have a very uphill battle. We have a stigma towards mental health which is a large obstacle in itself. This results in fewer resources invested in mental health treatment. We can see this with where we can go if we were physically ill. There are clinics, family doctors and emergency rooms for various physical illnesses. The same cannot be said about the mental illnesses.

This is only complicated when gender is involved. When so few resources are invested in mental illnesses, we see very small portion of it invested in boys and young men. People assume that men can simply "man" up and deal with these issues. If mental illnesses were so easy to deal with, we wouldn't have such a problem in the first place.

When those suffering cannot find help, they lose hope in their fight. When they lose hope, they will search for ways out and some go for suicide. If we can better tackle mental illnesses and give people the help they desperately need, then suicide rates should drop dramatically. People might point to all the information online but these cannot be compared to actual interaction with another person.

A person can have the most incredible writing and type it all online. A touching story can be great but the typed words cannot do it justice. Neither do video do justice to a powerful speaker since there are things you only feel when you are in their presence. The same is for those seeking help. They need real live people who can offer them comfort and give professional advice. Their physical presence give anchor to those fighting what appears to be a losing battle.

For those fighting these incredibly difficult battles, they need hope to not only keep fighting but also hold onto the belief they can be victorious. Such hope cannot be given over the internet or over the phone. Such hope can only be given by the physical presence of someone who has been there and won the war. As great as videos are, there's nothing more powerful than being present to the storytelling of a veteran of mental illnesses.

[Rick(amateur)]

-Hope 2-

When we lose hope, we practically give up completely. The opposite is also true where even a glimmer of hope can get them back up. If we were stuck in a very dark setting where there's no light, we feel helplessness and despair. If a firefly came along, we see hope. The firefly might not give much light but it provides enough to get us going again, especially in absolute darkness.

While a sun or flashlight might be nice, a firefly is the smallest thing we need to overcome a darkness that's completely overwhelming. When we are young and deal with various mental issues, we don't know where to go or who to seek help from. If there was a firefly acting as our guide, we'd never notice the darkness. After all, the illumination would be the only thing catching our attention.

I knew that, when I was experiencing the darkness and attempted my suicide, a small firefly would've made all the difference. Most of us don't need a lot of hope. A glimmer of hope that doesn't vanish after a few seconds provides us with strength we never thought we had. With that strength, we won't let any obstacles or challenges stand in our way.

That's why we need to give people hope. We don't need famous and successful people to give hope. Ordinary people can change lives, especially if they faced similar demons in the past. They don't need to give a lot to those in need. All they have to do is share a small act of kindness or give some words of encouragement. Small things matter and we mustn't forget that.

There are people out there calling for help but their voices are often lost. Most times, their silence say more than what comes out of their mouth. Do the small things like greet people or give hugs. They might refuse to accept at first because they only saw ugliness of our world. Eventually, we can show them the beauty of the world by providing them light through the small acts of kindness.

[Rick(amateur)]

-Hesitation-

While I was exploring my past regarding what I needed to improve, I realized that I hesitated a lot. I thought about a lot of changes and got many great ideas but, after some hesitation, I never went through them. I'm sure this is the case for a lot of people reading this. Whenever we do something new, we tend to hesitate since we doubt ourselves and wonder if this idea was good or not.

When we hesitate, we often think about the worst case scenarios if we went through with it. There might be good things but all our brain comes up with happened to be a list of bad thing. In essence, hesitation gives our brain time to come up with the list to help dissuade us. If we simply went through without hesitation, the list wouldn't show up and we likely would go through with it.

Now, this is essentially how brain is designed. It's built to protect us from danger and it worked very well for our ancestors who were hunting out in the wilderness. Basically, trying something new back then risked more. A mistake and they become some other creature's meal. That was the case then but no longer the case now. In many ways, failures nowadays doesn't meant immediate death.

I honestly don't think our brain has evolved. It still responds similarly as it had with our ancestors regarding pain, fear, pleasure and other responses. What changed is how our society operated and the technological advances we made over the centuries. We no longer run the risks of simply dying following a bad gamble. If anything, our current society rewards those who risks and never give up.

Hesitation no longer suits us nowadays when failures are basically lessons to get us further in life. Our brain might use hesitation to dissuade us but it's not always right due to how it's programmed. If we have a big dream, we shouldn't hesitate or there's a good chance it won't even get started. When you know you found your purpose, don't let hesitation stop you!

[Rick(amateur)]

-Hesitation 2-

Here are some ways I believe can help people overcome hesitation. Like most things in life, we need to figure out why we are hesitating. There are generally two reasons for why we hesitate, though there are a lot more other reasons depending on the person involved. The first reason is the lack of confidence. This is quite common where we aren't certain of our abilities to do a certain thing.

This lack of confidence might be due to low self-esteem or failures that were never forgotten. When we try to do something new, it's not hard to think back to our failures and begin doubting our abilities to do so. The fear of more failure easily transitions hesitation to outright rejection. No one want to fail and, as a result, the only route would be not taking action at all.

The second reason is the lack of courage. We lack courage to face our fears and the uncertainty. We might fear embarrassment following failure. In our society, many people want the approval of others. In a classroom setting, the person who stands out the most is usually the weirdo or the class clown, neither of which are really desirable for most people.

Regarding lack of confidence, people must know that they have the potential. They must also remember that things they could do confidently in the present wasn't always like that. For instance, people don't know how to bike when they were born. They had to learn and, after a few falls with some scrapes and cuts, master biking. This is the same with everything else as they're no different from biking.

As for lack of courage, people are braver than they think. This is often seen when they try out new things in life. This might be trying out a new cuisine or go to a new environment. For many people, the transition from elementary school to high school wasn't exceptionally smooth. It's a pretty big change with the pacing and the subjects learned. If people are adapt to these transitions, they can adapt to many other things and just have to believe in themselves.

In addition, the fear is natural because how's our brain is wired. Being fearful is part of being human but we mustn't let fear control our lives. This allows an emotion take over our decision making as opposed to our rational side or our gut. Our gut always have the best intention in mind while fear only gives our the options of fight or flee, neither of which are optimal when we try to pursue a dream.

The fear and confidence can be overcome by making small goals. Big dreams won't happen overnight but they are still made up of small building blocks. The building blocks can be accomplished each day and each of these achievements chase away a bit more fear and builds up a bit more confidence. Take these small steps and, before you know it, you have reached a certain milestone you never thought you can reach.