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Depression from Panic/Anxiety Please post any messages here about Depression that is directly related to Panic and anxiety.
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  #1  
Old 14-03-14, 01:47
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RoseEve RoseEve is offline
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How many times can one heart break?

I have no one that loves me. Not my mother, father, sisters, or brothers. My children love me but they are so small. My mother tells me they will turn away from me when they are older. I've been betrayed by everyone now. I'm alone. If it weren't for my children I would never leave my bed again. I'm just a shell that works and takes care of them. I try to not let other people see my pain. Especially my children. I feel like I am failing them. I just want time to pass. I am watching it pass. It's nighttime I can't sleep. Wish someone, anyone would care. No one does. I probably deserve it. It's hard with nothing to look forward to. No one to ask about your day. I wish I were anyone else but me.
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Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace; Where there is despair, hope; Where there is darkness, light; And where there is sadness, joy.
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  #2  
Old 14-03-14, 01:55
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I still Believe I still Believe is offline
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Re: How many times can one heart break?

We care RoseEve, don't be sad. You have the choice to make the decision to be happy for your children, and yourself..forget trying to please everyone else. Are you on meds for depression?
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  #3  
Old 14-03-14, 02:35
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jennclark jennclark is offline
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Re: How many times can one heart break?

Rose, you are an amazing strong person.
Think of positive characteristics about yourself, learn to love them, love yourself.
And know that we are here for you, Rose. If you need anyone to talk to don't be afraid to message me x

I believe you need to make some time for self-care, you're so busy caring for everyone else except yourself. Go and pamper yourself, spend the day watching movies, anything that makes you happy and relaxed. Self-care is very important! xx
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  #4  
Old 14-03-14, 03:41
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TooMuchToLiveFor TooMuchToLiveFor is offline
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Re: How many times can one heart break?

Oh, Rose, my heart just broke reading this. You are a valuable, precious, treasure- created with love, and a child of God.

I am so sorry your heart is so full of pain right now, but know that we are here for you in anyway we can be.

xxxxxx!
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  #5  
Old 14-03-14, 05:26
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HalfJack HalfJack is offline
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Re: How many times can one heart break?

I know it's hard, you are so strong for providing for your kids when you feel like this.
Don't let someone else ruin the bond you have with your children. The bond between you and your children is unique, enjoy it

I agree with JennClark, self care is important. Especially if you feel unloved by the people around you. Tell yourself you deserve better, do things that make you happy.
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“It's not all bad. Heightened self-consciousness, apartness, an inability to join in, physical shame and self-loathing—they are not all bad. Those devils have been my angels. Without them I would never have disappeared into language, literature, the mind, laughter and all the mad intensities that made and unmade me.”
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  #6  
Old 14-03-14, 06:31
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blue moon blue moon is offline
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Re: How many times can one heart break?

You are loved by all,you are just feeling down for now.Tomorrow [s a new day you keep on going be strong,you have children to care about and they need you.

Love Petra x
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The past is History,the Future a Mystery,this moment is a Gift,that is why it is called the Present.
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  #7  
Old 14-03-14, 08:01
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Oosh Oosh is offline
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Re: How many times can one heart break?

What your mum said is outrageous and absolutely not true. Your kids will be there for you and appreciate you more and more as they get older, mature and recognise that you've always been there for them.
Just like you're noticing the absence of someone genuine and loving in your life who cares about you and is always putting you first, they'll be NOTICING they have that special person and always have had - YOU.
Keep giving to them and being there.

Stop listening to what your mum says, shocking.
Some people rejoice in keeping people down because it makes them feel better about their own inadequate lives. You need to build up a resilience to it and see it for the rubbish it is.

Feeling down can make you believe nobody likes or wants you because when you look inside you see no light and you wonder what anyone could like.
If you're consistently feeling like that maybe try an antidepressant to give you a period of relief from feeling like that.

If you're lonely and want someone in your life to be there for YOU channel that energy actively searching for that person. Identify who that might be.
What about a single dad who is feeling the same way. Low on confidence and who would love someone to fit into his family life without rejecting him.
Where might you find a man like that ?

If you have children a perfect support network is other mothers with children your age, baby groups etc where the mothers are feeling just like you.
Look in your local area for baby groups. Push yourself along there. Tell them how you feel. I am certain they'll immediately relate and put an arm round you and then you'll have some mum friends to contact when you need a lift.

Surround yourself with new, supportive people and don't listen to that nonsense anymore.

See about that antidepressant if you think it's suitable and see if you can jump into a new state of mind while you make changes.

Now picture what an exciting new life you could have over the next few years if you work at these things. Plenty of reasons to be optimistic.

Last edited by Oosh; 14-03-14 at 08:15.
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  #8  
Old 14-03-14, 11:34
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RoseEve RoseEve is offline
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Re: How many times can one heart break?

Hi everyone thank you so much for responding. I was in a very bad place last night. My husband as some of you know has been in jail for the last year and a half. My mother and I live together (she has her own apartment in the house) and has really been the source of my sadness. She blames me for everything that has happened. She says it's my fault because I married him and now the kids have no father and money is very tight. After hearing this so many times you begin to wonder if it is true. Now, she has taken to only talking to me when she absolutely has to. It gets lonely. Last night she put me over the edge because she went out with her friend and I asked if she had a good time. She just gave me a very cold answer and then shut the door in my face. I have tried antidepressants for anxiety and I really don't like how they make me feel. I feel a bit better today. I'm not ready to meet anyone else because honestly I still love my husband even though I doubt there is a future for us because I don't trust him. You are right about trying to meet new people. There are groups I can join with my kids for single parents. Thank you for your continued support. XoXo
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Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace; Where there is despair, hope; Where there is darkness, light; And where there is sadness, joy.
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  #9  
Old 14-03-14, 11:49
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shaka shaka is online now
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Re: How many times can one heart break?

Hi RoseEve. Sending you good lots of and positive thoughts.
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  #10  
Old 16-03-14, 03:59
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HalfJack HalfJack is offline
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Re: How many times can one heart break?

Really good to hear you're feeling more positive x
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“It's not all bad. Heightened self-consciousness, apartness, an inability to join in, physical shame and self-loathing—they are not all bad. Those devils have been my angels. Without them I would never have disappeared into language, literature, the mind, laughter and all the mad intensities that made and unmade me.”
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