Going crazy :'(

[Stayathomemum15]

Hello!
I'm a newbie and I joined to get all my worries out I feel I can't keep saying out loud without sounding like a broken record!!

My mum passed away 6 years ago with lung cancer when I was 25! I never knew how terrible terminal cancer could actually be and the minute she passed away all these panic attacks about losing her and dying came flooding in.

Now the problem with me which is a little bit bizarre is I'm now petrified of cancer and convince myself on a daily basis that I have breast cancer. It drives me insane. I think about it all the time and I just can't deal with it anymore but what eats me alive is I don't have the confident to go to the Drs to get this looked at. I'm too petrified!

Does anyone out there feel the same way?

Thank you all for your time x.x

[AnnieMags]

First of all, I'm sorry for the way you lost your mum, that must have been very hard. A fear of cancer is of course very common in people with health anxiety, and many women are particularly terrified of breast cancer. Apart from anything else, it is so 'high profile' and so much in the media, and this tends to both trigger and fuel this particular fear.

Do you have any reason to think you have breast cancer or is it a generalised 'what if I have it?' type of fear? Either way, here's what I would do: make an appointment with the nicest, most sympathetic GP in your practice, tell him or her everything you have told us here, and have a thorough examination. All will be well and you will be reassured. Living with such a fear is no way to live and I am sure it will be proven to be completely unnecessary. Best wishes from Annie

[rbm]

I have an ultrasound once a year, people are laughing at me, they don't know i struggle with my thoughts every day like you do.so once a year i reassure myself i'm fine and if it happens, i would have caught it just in time.sorry for your loss, hope you find comfort here like the rest of us

[PokerRob]

Your just like me... There are those who need test after test after test after test in a futile attemp to convice themselves there O.K, however, they keep finding potential faults in the tests...

And then there is people like us who are too scared to go!

When I was younger I had a rash on my penis, of course Dr Google let me down the penile cancer route with the only cure being to chop it off! Turned out to be eczema!

Right now Im scarred I have mercury poisoning from a rare form of mercury called dimethylmercury... The though of going for a mercury poi..... I cant even write the rest of that sentence without risking another panic attack from occuring...

Now time to go back on focus on the tingling I think I have in my hands and feet!

[Stayathomemum15]

Thank you everyone for getting back to me. It's reassuring to know that this is more common then I first thought!

The reason why I am convinced it's breast because where I am heavy chested compared to the rest of my body. I can get terrible ache from the bras I wear etc and obviously one throbbing pain and that's it. I go lightheaded my whole thoughts are about it! I have 2 young children and I just don't want them to ever remember their mum always being in the edge.

Thank you for the advice I will make an appointment that way I can hopefully put this all behind me xx

[eternally optimistic]

Hi..

Definitely get an appointment, if only to reassure yourself that all is good.

It will give you an opportunity to discuss anything else of importance.

Don't feel bad about going to see GP, if it is affecting your health because you are worrying, then that in itself is good reason to go.

Best wishes and I hope you get reassurance.

[Lauraallan86]

Nope your not alone cancer is my worst fear 3 years ago a friends parents both passed from cancer within 6 months of each other and I believe this happening ignited my health anxiety I already suffered with gad but this sent my health anxiety off I too last year had an abnormal breast and was thinking the worst and put it of I bit the bullet and went to the gp and they referred me straight away to the breast clinic go and put your mind at rest easier said than done I know as now I've been having tests that I'm slightly anemic and that awful fear has reared its head again my mind has gone into overdrive x

[cattia]

I too have a terrible fear of cancer, ranging from skin to breast, brain tumour, at the moment it's lymphoma. I think there is so much publicity about it and we all know someone affected by it which makes it very real. I am so sorry that you lost your mum like that, I can't imagine how hard that must be.