New and need advice -- long post
Hi there -- I am a 26-year-old woman, and I've had other anxieties over health that might be considered normal -- often worrying if I was pregnant despite being on birth control, being sick and then worrying I might have HIV before going in to get tested (the negative test knocked that down, of course), and worrying about changes in my bowel movements that might have also been due to other anxiety. When I was young, my parents had split up and I'd be sent to stay with my dad in another state every summer, during which time I'd be sad and homesick and would have regular but loose stool/diarrhea for the duration of my stay (at the time I thought maybe it was from drinking different water or something). I always plan ahead and tend to dislike changes in plans. But I've never felt like I was having an anxiety problem until a month ago. I was just married in March, all the wedding planning stress is gone, and I am totally happy and relaxed...except for these recent worries about my health.
Some background: On our honeymoon in Hawaii, we managed to get food poisoning. Luckily we were pretty much over it in a couple of days with antibiotics and Immodium. It took a couple weeks for both of us to get our bowels functioning correctly again. I was also taking double the normal dose of birth control to avoid menstruation during the honeymoon, which worked. When we got home and I had been off the pill a couple days for my off week, that's when my anxiety began. I started to feel I was having heart palpitations when I tried to go to bed. The feeling scared me and kicked in adrenaline that made it hard to sleep. I got diarrhea again and had frequent urination that night and the next day. I was sure something was wrong with my heart...that now I was finally in a happy home with my husband, that something was wrong that was going to mess it all up for me.
I made an appointment with my doctor to check it out in a couple days, and at the appointment, I also had a migraine with nausea (which I often get at onset of menstruation) worse than any I'd had before. I felt horrible and wondered if I was having a stroke or something. My blood pressure was slightly elevated (120/85 -- when I had food poisoning 1.5 weeks before, it was even higher, at 130/90). I also had a blood test that revealed my cholesterol was high (it always has been -- this time, LDLs were at 169) and my thyroid was slightly elevated (which he said might be due to the birth control). He said it sounded like palpitations and I could get a holter monitor test done if I wanted, so I did -- I thought I felt a lot of palps while on the monitor, but the results came back "normal" (the nurse who called with results couldn't give me any details beyond that).
The palpitations went away shortly after the normal holter test. But I continued to worry about my high cholesterol (I have made some dietary changes to deal with that), and after researching it some on the Internet, I began to feel the same panicky feeling I got when I felt the heart palpitations -- upset stomach, frequent, urination, etc. I was fine for a few days, and then this swine flu business started up, and after I read a note from an aquaintance about how a 23-year-old friend of hers had just died after complaining of a respiratory illness and they suspected the flu, I started to feel like I had a fever. I took my temperature and it was 98.6, of course. And then there was the time last week where I had sushi for lunch and made my stomach upset just by wondering if I might get food poisoning again. I went to the gym and I was concerned that my heart rate was going higher than before with little effort. The anxiety keeps popping up and I have a hard time stopping it once it kicks in. I get this sense of "doom," which scares me because I read somewhere that that can be a sign that you're about to have a heart attack, for no real reason at all except I'm thinking about my health or wondering when my anxiety will go away. It makes me think I need to go to the doctor and ask for some tests just to be safe (which I haven't done, since the palpitations). It usually happens at night, so sometimes I'm even reluctant to go to bed because I don't want my idle thoughts to turn to anxiety and get me worked up again. I also have more muscle twitches and muscle jolts when I try to lay down (similar to the feeling that you're falling, but without the vertigo).
The more time I have to sit and think about it or research things online, the worse it gets....if I spend the evening watching TV with my hubby or out with friends, I'm fine.
I am confused about why this is happening now. In the past, my life wasn't so happy and stable, and I've had 2 (benign) breast lumps removed...I worried a lot about that to the point where I had a hard time working, but it didn't manifest as other physical symptoms like this. I am otherwise fairly healthy -- no other chronic health issues, I am no longer overweight since losing 12 pounds for the wedding and exercised 3-4 times a week prior to these health worries. I've only gone a handful of times since the worries with my heart, but have been fine going an hour on a machine.
All of this leads me to think that the sudden onset of these vague and fleeting symptoms may just be physical manifestations of anxiety. I also started taking extra vitamin C, a calcium-magnesium-zinc supplement with vitamin D, omega-3s in addition to my regular multivitamin in the last couple of weeks to ward off illness and possibly help with the cholesterol (and I wonder if these might be causing my indigestion, too).
So if you've managed to make it through all that (thank you, if so!) here are my questions:
-- Does this sound like anxiety to you? Can hormone fluctuations or the effects of food poisoning/antibiotics trigger palpitations and/or anxiety?
-- Should I talk to my regular doctor again about these symptoms to rule out any medical causes because I've only been seen for the palpitations, or should I go straight to talking to a mental health professional? (I will be going back to the doctor in a month for another blood test anyway to see if I'm bringing my cholesterol down with my diet). I don't really want to go on anxiety medication, but if it would help, I might.
-- What are some specific things I can do to manage this anxiety on my own? I'd appreciate recommendations for tea, supplements, meditation techniques, etc.
Thank you for reading -- I haven't told all this to my husband because I don't want him to think his new wife is going nuts.He knows I'm a worrier, but after complaining to him in the past about how my mom has hypochondriac tendencies, I'd hate to make him think I turned into her after he put the ring on my finger! Ha. My mom thinks it's hormones or I'm just having trouble settling back down after handling so much stress from planning the wedding, so I'm super-focused on any little health problem but it will pass. I just don't want to let it take control of my life...advice is appreciated!
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Dusky x
