swgrl09
29-08-11, 22:52
Hi everybody, I did not notice there was this introduction board so I have already been posting around! Just jumped ahead to what I was worried about :)
Anyway my name is Jessica, and I have had health anxiety for about a year and a half now. A lot of my family members had it, especially my mom, and now my aunts and one of my sisters does too. I did not really suffer from it until a year and a half ago after I was in a car accident. Even then, it was manageable and I just sort of lived with it. Then my mom got sick this past November with a rare neuroendocrine cancer. She died a month and a half after being diagnosed. She had absolutely no symptoms until Thanksgiving, when she went to the ER with severe stomach cramps. She was always at the doctor, took care of herself, etc. It just had somehow gone unnoticed.
This shook me up a lot and really made my health anxiety more severe. Since she passed away in January, I notice absolutely every symptom and automatically think it is the worst disease possible. I jump to conclusions and freak out. I am one of the many here who use "Dr. Google" and terrify myself. It causes problems in my relationship with my boyfriend, who lives with me. He is very patient but can only take so much. I have been to a counselor, but still am struggling. I force myself to go to the doctor when I am scared just because I cannot live with myself when I am like this. I also worry about my boyfriend's health because he does not have this anxiety and I am scared of losing somebody else.
I am here because I am trying to figure this out and stop this behavior before it ruins my life. I am 22, 23 in a week. I am young and healthy and one of the things my mom said to me before she died was to not live my life worrying like she did, that it was not worth it and it didn't save her or make a difference. Instead I find myself doing just the opposite!
I am thankful that I have found this site. I felt so alone for a long time because I was embarrassed to go to my family about this, having been the "normal" one for so long without this anxiety. I felt like I was going crazy, and I am glad that I am not. Thanks in advance for your help.
Anyway my name is Jessica, and I have had health anxiety for about a year and a half now. A lot of my family members had it, especially my mom, and now my aunts and one of my sisters does too. I did not really suffer from it until a year and a half ago after I was in a car accident. Even then, it was manageable and I just sort of lived with it. Then my mom got sick this past November with a rare neuroendocrine cancer. She died a month and a half after being diagnosed. She had absolutely no symptoms until Thanksgiving, when she went to the ER with severe stomach cramps. She was always at the doctor, took care of herself, etc. It just had somehow gone unnoticed.
This shook me up a lot and really made my health anxiety more severe. Since she passed away in January, I notice absolutely every symptom and automatically think it is the worst disease possible. I jump to conclusions and freak out. I am one of the many here who use "Dr. Google" and terrify myself. It causes problems in my relationship with my boyfriend, who lives with me. He is very patient but can only take so much. I have been to a counselor, but still am struggling. I force myself to go to the doctor when I am scared just because I cannot live with myself when I am like this. I also worry about my boyfriend's health because he does not have this anxiety and I am scared of losing somebody else.
I am here because I am trying to figure this out and stop this behavior before it ruins my life. I am 22, 23 in a week. I am young and healthy and one of the things my mom said to me before she died was to not live my life worrying like she did, that it was not worth it and it didn't save her or make a difference. Instead I find myself doing just the opposite!
I am thankful that I have found this site. I felt so alone for a long time because I was embarrassed to go to my family about this, having been the "normal" one for so long without this anxiety. I felt like I was going crazy, and I am glad that I am not. Thanks in advance for your help.