ElizabethJane
02-09-11, 17:06
As some of you know my Father died in April. I am still dealing with the emotions concerning that. I have a good network of friends and I am also married with a reasonably supportive husband. I am busy at the moment because my boss had to sack somebody plus I have been working weekends because we are short staffed. Well that seems ok a bit stressful but all ok? My husband has a good job (I work part-time) so we are alright money wise. My sister is on her own. She is very short of money. We are in the process of selling Dad's house but we haven't a buyer yet. We had one but they pulled out. We have released some of the money from the estate but most of this has gone on the funeral and paying other expenses ( which I paid out of my own money) The money issue has brought a dreadful; strain on our relationship. I know that before Dad died he was giving her thousands. I know that is water under the bridge. WE cannot bring it back. Others have said if I write a cheque for her to write a cheque for myself also! She rings this morning crying on the phone so I go around and arrange a doctors appointment for her as she has chronic back pain. I lend her my TENS. It transpires that the docs think that she has shingles. It all fits.He has given her morphine patches. I gave her some money for a taxi as I had to go to work. She has a part-time job having previously worked for the civil service and had a good job. Shge gave up work to look after Dad. It was a tremendous strain partly because his renal cancer was undiagnosed. The 'money' issues were just a time bomb ready to go off after he died. Whilst he was still alive she borrowed from him now it is me. I think about what my parents would have done for her if they were still alive. I have been a chronic depressive in the past and unabel to work. My sister lacks motivation. Her house is a complete tip. I have offered to help her tidy it as I know that would make her feel better. I'm wondering if she is depressed too? We did the probate ourselves and that has been granted but she would not make phone calls or write letters. My husband suggested I delegate some of tasks to her but she did not do them. I have recently received a letter about tax that might be owing to Dad. This letter should have been sent weeks ago so I have ended up doing it. She is an intelligent lady with a degree so I'm not sure what is wrong. Fortunately the executors account is in my name only so she cannot draw on the dwindling funds in that account. I forgive her and will help all I can. I miss Dad too but I don't think that is the whole story. Thanks for listening I just feel overwhelmed and burdened at the moment.If the house does not sell we will have to put into an auction. EJ