fadefade
03-09-11, 21:31
Think it's been a year or so since I last came here. I'm a 36 year old man happily married with 2 children. Had quite a year - main happenings as follows:-
Aug'10 - returned from a business trip to Dubai with chest pains, shortness of breath and dizziness. Made a Doctors appointment but, on the morning of the appointment, felt like I was going to faint so called the Doctor who said to go straight to the hospital. Had what I thought was a heart attack in the car on the way to the hospital - turned out to be my first ever panic attack. Checked into hospital in a high dependency ward for the night for observation (and also to do a scan of my lungs to check I didn't have a pulmonary embolism as a result of the flight). Was at least 40 years younger than anyone else in the room and witnessed one guy die in front of me. Released from hospital with the all clear but started having panic attacks more frequently (including the start of heart palpitations). Was around 17.5 stone at this point.
Sep'10 - diagnosed with acid reflux (the reason for the chest pain). Started to see a specialist and went on to Lanzoprazole which definitely helped. Panic attacks & palpitations started to reduce.
Dec'10 - had lost 3 stone as part of a diet to prevent the reflux. Got convinced that I didn't just have acid reflux but either Barretts Oesophagus or throat cancer. Demanded the specialist give me an endoscopy to check. Got delayed by the snow which caused me to hit a low point. Started to stop eating with the aim of collapsing and being checked into hospital to have the endoscopy. Eventually had it and again got the all clear. Donated £100 to cancer research as a promise I made to myself if I didn't have cancer. Panic pretty bad by this point but got better as the year started.
Apr'11 - the recession started to affect my company and I had to make people redundant. The whole process (selection, advising & notice) took a lot out of me and went onto Citalopram. Also had a blood test which diagnosed me with high cholesterol (6.7). Went on another diet to get the cholesterol down to a normal level.
Jun'11 - lost a further stone (down from 17.5 stone to 13.5 stone). Cholesterol down to 4.6. Doctor very impressed! Stopped taking Citalopram. Started to get palpitations again - no panic attacks though.
Jul'11 - developed a headache, was sure I had a brain tumour...
Current - at around 13.10 stone now (Doctor told me no more diets and try and eat more to prove I could put weight on!). Very frequent chest tightness, panic attacks (dizziness, shortness of breath, feet/hands tingling, palpitations, etc). Back onto Citalopram. Diagnosed with anxiety. So far, hasn't really affected my work (thank god) - just leave the building and take a walk outside when feel panic attacks starting. Waiting on a 24hr heart monitor although Doctor doing it only as a precaution. Also been asked to take part in Cognitive Behavioural session which should be interesting.
Feels good to document it all. It's strange in that I've lost 4 stone since this point last year and everyone is commenting on how good I look and asking how I did it. Don't tell anyone exactly how! Just wish I could now kick the anxiety. Just being able to have a mild symptom and not be convinced I'm about to die would be a nice start :shrug:
Anyway, nice to meet you all again - will post more regularly from now onwards!
Aug'10 - returned from a business trip to Dubai with chest pains, shortness of breath and dizziness. Made a Doctors appointment but, on the morning of the appointment, felt like I was going to faint so called the Doctor who said to go straight to the hospital. Had what I thought was a heart attack in the car on the way to the hospital - turned out to be my first ever panic attack. Checked into hospital in a high dependency ward for the night for observation (and also to do a scan of my lungs to check I didn't have a pulmonary embolism as a result of the flight). Was at least 40 years younger than anyone else in the room and witnessed one guy die in front of me. Released from hospital with the all clear but started having panic attacks more frequently (including the start of heart palpitations). Was around 17.5 stone at this point.
Sep'10 - diagnosed with acid reflux (the reason for the chest pain). Started to see a specialist and went on to Lanzoprazole which definitely helped. Panic attacks & palpitations started to reduce.
Dec'10 - had lost 3 stone as part of a diet to prevent the reflux. Got convinced that I didn't just have acid reflux but either Barretts Oesophagus or throat cancer. Demanded the specialist give me an endoscopy to check. Got delayed by the snow which caused me to hit a low point. Started to stop eating with the aim of collapsing and being checked into hospital to have the endoscopy. Eventually had it and again got the all clear. Donated £100 to cancer research as a promise I made to myself if I didn't have cancer. Panic pretty bad by this point but got better as the year started.
Apr'11 - the recession started to affect my company and I had to make people redundant. The whole process (selection, advising & notice) took a lot out of me and went onto Citalopram. Also had a blood test which diagnosed me with high cholesterol (6.7). Went on another diet to get the cholesterol down to a normal level.
Jun'11 - lost a further stone (down from 17.5 stone to 13.5 stone). Cholesterol down to 4.6. Doctor very impressed! Stopped taking Citalopram. Started to get palpitations again - no panic attacks though.
Jul'11 - developed a headache, was sure I had a brain tumour...
Current - at around 13.10 stone now (Doctor told me no more diets and try and eat more to prove I could put weight on!). Very frequent chest tightness, panic attacks (dizziness, shortness of breath, feet/hands tingling, palpitations, etc). Back onto Citalopram. Diagnosed with anxiety. So far, hasn't really affected my work (thank god) - just leave the building and take a walk outside when feel panic attacks starting. Waiting on a 24hr heart monitor although Doctor doing it only as a precaution. Also been asked to take part in Cognitive Behavioural session which should be interesting.
Feels good to document it all. It's strange in that I've lost 4 stone since this point last year and everyone is commenting on how good I look and asking how I did it. Don't tell anyone exactly how! Just wish I could now kick the anxiety. Just being able to have a mild symptom and not be convinced I'm about to die would be a nice start :shrug:
Anyway, nice to meet you all again - will post more regularly from now onwards!