Dont know whats real or not anymore

[bukendaa]

Hey im Austin and ive been a member on this site for many years...but this time in my life is truly scary...And i thought panic atacks were bad..On the 23rd of august i took marighwana i know what i did was wrong but i cant go back..the night i took it..i had a masive panic atack and fell asleep in the panic atack...what was to come next is 13 days of hell...the first 4 days were the worsti was haulicnating quite heavily....My memory is distorted severly..cant remember a min..from a hour...my vision is distorted...i dont fell real...i have nightmares..i fell my brain has had damiged...i went into the Mental health ward last friday and stayed for 3 days...i was a mess...crying uncontrolbly...nightmares..visions...flashbacks..e ven as a write this mesage things just seem like im not real.my whole life has been a dream..I just dont know what to do...What is my body and brain going through..Have i caused major trauma from a little bit of pot please im so scared...sometimes im psychotic and talk about cuting my brain open to stop whats goin on inside...whats going on someone anyone please HELP! :weep:

Im only 16..things were going so well before this all happend...Im praying to god..then im screaming at him "WHY ME..WHY ME..WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS PLEASE TAKE ME HOME PLEASE!!!!!!!!...........

im so tired..but the dreams i have are terfiying..leaches crawling all over me...im starting to loose my sanity day by day

im also sucidal..its so funy..how things can be going so well one day and the next your life is ripped away from you..i looked up Deprsoilzation disorder and it seems to be pretty much what im going through....Depersonalization disorder is one of a group of conditions called dissociative disorders. Dissociative disorders are mental illnesses that involve disruptions or breakdowns of memory, consciousness or awareness, identity and/or perception—mental functions that normally operate smoothly. When one or more of these functions is disrupted, symptoms can result. These symptoms can interfere with a person’s general functioning, including social and work activities, and relationships.


My family seems not real..i seem not real..my house which was always my safe zone seems unreal..do i need to see a nuroligist and tell him my symptoms..please i just want to get on with my life that was going so well..!

[Anxious_gal]

Do you know what plant the weed was from?
Was it grass or in a brown block? If it was the block, lots of things can be added to that.
4 days is a pretty long time to be suffering from hallucinations, have you been to the hospital or to a doctor?

Flash back are very common with drugs such as acid, not sure about weed though.

Drugs can set off mental illness if you are any way prone to it.
Sounds like your suffering from psychosis possibly, brought on by the drugs.
go see a doctor, he may put you on antipsychotic medication to help, or run some tests or end you to a neurologist to rule out anything with you brain, this is very standard if you are suffering from hallucinations.

the only person who can help you is you, so get your self down to the hospital or to your doctors office.
The sooner they figure out what is wrong the sooner they can start treating you and helping to get better.

[bukendaa]

Well all the docs say its anxity and i havent done damidge to my brain...but i just dont know..might make a booking to nurolegest..\

Its like im in one big atack..but each day..fell better and better...

[bukendaa]

guys any opinions

[Anxious_gal]

Are you on medication or getting therapy to help you cope?
Which symptoms do you get daily?
Depersonalisation is very common , it's one of the most disturbing symptoms of anxiety.
It's also a symptom of migraines so it can have a nurogical cause .
If you are suffering this much do you think a nurologist could reasure you?
It would be good to have everything ruled out.
It does seem how ever to be anxiety which might have been induced by the drug use.

Have you posted on any other forums ? I know they are a few around that deal with the aftermath of drugs use, not sure of the names though.

[Col]

Bukendaa,

Sounds awful what your experiencing, can tell by the way you've written your post how u feel!!!

I know people who've smoked and they've had various symptoms soooo, you never know but sounds to me like this particular drug u mention has triggered a cascade of events!
And now your making the symptoms worse by panicking.

I think, meditation, tapping calm exercises and sleep & docs.

Take it easy:winks:

[bukendaa]

Well guys the symptoms all started on the night of the 23rd of august...since then my life has been changed for ever....my brain isnt working proply..im going to get my pop to take me to nuroligist..I dont know whats wrong...my brain just isnt taking in info like it used to and its making me very panicy...one day fells like a year...i cant remember things much..very fogy..my body clock cant fell time like it used to i wouldent know the dif between 3 mins or 3 hours..im geting severe depresion..sever nightmares...sever depersilization..im going to get my granpa to take me to nurolgist..its just so scary guys./

. Memory and cognitive abilities....1 hour ago will fell like 4 hours ago..i will forget how i got somewere..things fell rushed..my body seems to folow its self..like say theres 2 chairs 6 meteres away from eachother i got up and sat on the other chair..my body fells like its still in the other chair...im starting to even forget my family..sort of...even forgot who i was the other night..not really but sort of..ben teribly depresed..al i want to do is sleep..i will be going to nuroligist in about 13 days...should i just hold out and keep calm untill then..?? its just a nightmare im only 16 i dont desreve this...i have had symptoms of sort of epilipsey like at a comp screen or watching tv will get images in my head of past places..theres even a post on here about it...from a few years back.. the docs did brain tests for brain damidge like the finger trick and stuff...what sort of tests can nuroligists do...should i just get on with my life untill i get to see the docs...its just also alot of depresion and sort of like shock to my body aswell...things just arnt runing smoothly for me upstairs....like the nurosepters in my brain arnt conecting right.I get visions in my head

i was under alot of stress the last few days like intense stress..and haulcinations and stuff when i was in the mental health ward for 3 days it was pretty stressfull...can stress cause brain defunction..and also im in great anger aswell because my life was going so great before all this happend to me i was on top of the world...fit healthy 15 year old geting good merits at school...now since this has happend turn my world upside down.

The depresion side is very severe..im also sucidial like i just want to put photos up on the wall of my family and just slowly die...and think of good past memorys and get some peace because all i want is peace....


days fell like years...i fell unreal..like im nothing..like im a shell of who i used to be before...im just so confused...why does the brain want to harm itself

[bukendaa]

is there help for me??/

[loveletter]

Hi I am so sad to read what is happening to you.
You must be so very scared I know I would be.

In 1985 I smoked weed and I smoked it once only once in the whole of my life and I have never ever been the same since.

I now am agoraphobic have been since I smoked the weed. Can not leave the house at all on my own.
Have lived with being dizzy for over years years, balance has totally gone always lean and walk to the left.

Have problems swallowing solid food and have not eaten right for over 20 years.
I suffer from derelization sometimes.
Sometimes get flash backs to the night of smoking the weed.
Sort of if I am walking feels like I am not walking and I am floating but do not get this as much now.
I have to many phobias which include
Fear of heavy rain thunder storms
Fear of wind and snow
fear of the dark have to take torches and candles to bed every night in case of a power cut.
Claustrophobia I do not even shut my own bedroom or bathroom door.

The doctors throughout the years have told me that it is all anxiety.

I do not think I will ever know if I would have got this all if I had not have smoked weed that night.
At the time I had lost a baby found my father dead and he had been laying there about 2 weeks before I had found him. And then my son my only child then age 4 got leukaemia and was given 6 weeks to live.

So would I have got all this if I had not smoked weed that night I will never ever know.

I am a born again Christian now and love the Lord with every thing I am and like you I cry to him to take me home.

I feel so very sad for you and what you are going through.
I will pray you get the right help and things will get some what better for you

[loveletter]

Ps was this your first time in smoking this or had you done it before x

[loveletter]

Just wanted to add my eldest son smoked skunk from the age of 13.
When he was 18 he sort of went like what you are saying here.
He kept going to a and e at all times of the night and they kept saying nothing was wrong with him.
He stoped smoking it but still felt real bad 24 hours every day and night.
He asked to be admitted to hospital but they said no and if it was because of the drugs it would go away.
It did go away a couple of months later but he did sometimes have panic attacks for a while after.
He has never smoked it again and is ok now apart from being very shy and having a social phobia