What would you tell yourself ?

[munkeyinblack]

I read a book recently written by celebrities who all wrote a letter to themselves at aged 16, giving advice and telling what not to worry about and that everything would be ok.

Looking back now, I'm only 24 but im completly different from myself at 16

If you had to write that letter what would you tell yourself ?

I think I'd tell myself that it does get better and that its ok to be different....

Be interesting to see what you would all say . Feel free to write the letter if you want :)

Munkey

[f0rest]

id tell myself not to worry about what other people think :P

[AnotherNewYear]

Dear Debbie aged 16

There is a fine line between being a 'deep thinking' and being mad. You are just a deep thinker.

All the stuff you are doing now is because you are feeling unloved (even though i know you would never admit to it). You are not the black sheep of the family and over time you will learn to love yourself and allow others to love you too. Your mum re training as a psychologist will screw you up for a while ...she is just trying to fix you (in her own way) ...you dont need fixing ...and she will see this. You are not mad.

You have a lot of good friends ....keep them close as you will know them for the rest of your life .... You wont push them away and they wont think you are mad. They love you.

You wont do well at school ....but you are not stupid...school just doesn't suit you (or you don't suit school lol) ...you will go back to college and Uni when you are ready ...and you will do well. You will do your dream job and do it well. You do have a right to be there and can manage the job emotionally ....you will prove yourself ...you are not mad.

Don't leave it 20 yrs with out seeing a doctor about your panic attacks .... don't try and file them away neatly in your mind or try to deal with them alone .... distraction will only help short term ...it is not the answer..... you can get better ... and you are not mad.

You will be off to a party in a couple of months ... please, please - use a condom.

Your older self xxxx

[Hazel B]

I would tell myself not to bottle things up, hold it all in and pretend to be brave. Let it all out when you need to: have a good shout or cry and show vulnerability every now and then. It makes you human not weak.

If you had done this earleir it would have saved hundreds of £'s in counslelling.

[M155anthr0p3]

Dear Debbie aged 16

There is a fine line between being a 'deep thinking' and being mad. You are just a deep thinker.

All the stuff you are doing now is because you are feeling unloved (even though i know you would never admit to it). You are not the black sheep of the family and over time you will learn to love yourself and allow others to love you too. Your mum re training as a psychologist will screw you up for a while ...she is just trying to fix you (in her own way) ...you dont need fixing ...and she will see this. You are not mad.

You have a lot of good friends ....keep them close as you will know them for the rest of your life .... You wont push them away and they wont think you are mad. They love you.

You wont do well at school ....but you are not stupid...school just doesn't suit you (or you don't suit school lol) ...you will go back to college and Uni when you are ready ...and you will do well. You will do your dream job and do it well. You do have a right to be there and can manage the job emotionally ....you will prove yourself ...you are not mad.

Don't leave it 20 yrs with out seeing a doctor about your panic attacks .... don't try and file them away neatly in your mind or try to deal with them alone .... distraction will only help short term ...it is not the answer..... you can get better ... and you are not mad.

You will be off to a party in a couple of months ... please, please - use a condom.

Your older self xxxx

I love your post xxx

[Kieran]

Hi Kieran aged 16, I'm you 6 years from now.

You have to choose your own path in life, don't let people talk/bully you into doing something you have no interest in - it will only end badly.

You know what you want to do in life, so don't kid yourself on by replying 'I don't know' when people ask what you want to be when you grow up. Don't pass on responsibility for your own future. If you do, you'll kick yourself for not being a stronger person.

The decisions you make will shape your life, so at least make sure they are your decisions. They might turn out to be the wrong decisions but at least it will have been YOUR choice.

Life won't always be as easy as this for you. And it won't always be as fun. You're enjoying the care-free stuff and that's great, enjoy every minute while it lasts.

Every teenager is self-conscious, no matter how much of a front they present, you're not the only one so don't hide yourself away because of it.

You'll be amazed by the amount of girls who'll tell you they fancied you at High School years later. But you never had a chance because you never thought you were good enough.

You doubt yourself so much (still do), but take a second to look around you. Look at the people you have around you, they're not there out of politeness. They like you because of who you are, not in spite of who you are.

Logic has nothing to do with the way you are feeling, but you won't figure that out for a few years yet. You can logically assess all your qualities and still not know why there's something missing.

The biggest mistake you'll make is not making enough mistakes. You're 16, mate. You miss 100% of the chances you don't take. Don't wait for life to fall into your lap, you have to go out and get it yourself.

Among all the screams of confidence in your head, why do you always hear the whisper of doubt?

Just believe in yourself pal, you can go along way

xx

P.S. Don't wait til you're 30 to tell your 22 year-old self all this, you'll have wasted too much time by then.
Get out there and grab life by the b*lls and make things happen.

[RafflesGeorgiou]

I have no idea, I was 16 only last month.... :shrug: I'd love to look back on it and tell myself things though :) !! xo

[bottleblond]

Makes me really quite sad when i see the (Kids) as i call them, like raff's age and Emma and Duke because i was the exact same at that ages. So i suppose i would say the following....

Don't waste all those years that you could spend being happy, confident, doing all those things that kids your age should be doing. Because 24 years down the line (and time i HAVE wasted due to anxiety) absolutely NOTHING bad has happened to me. You have soooo soooo much to look forward to and you will do so many amazing things.

Being 16 is just the start of being independant and choosing which direction you want to go in in life. You CAN do ANYTHING you want to and don't let the dreaded anxiety stop you from doing it.

:hugs:

[evil monkey]

listen to advice, but decide for yourself whether its right for you. It might not be. (you might only find out if it's wrong advice 10 years down the line...but...that's half the fun....int it). The other person might have a completely different plan or situation or agenda. They might be deliberately trying to #### things up.

If you absolutely positively need a miracle, do it yourself. Blind faith can prevent you from life&reality, dont let religion ruin things. Don't always trust authority. dont overestimate things. Things don't 'have' to happen. there's more biological things than we know about at first. sometimes even friends just dont care, and wont know about 'anxiety'.

Dont pretend the things that do matter, dont. it can waste time. it aint odd. its anxiety. years of subtle mini-panic attack effects of fight/flight - your mind is uncomfortable with whats happening and is trying to do something about it.

[bottleblond]

To myslef, i would say...

Listen and trust your mum because she was always right about the anxiety.

She was and still is the best.

[RafflesGeorgiou]

Thanks Lisa for the kind advice/words :hugs:

[saro]

Dear Sarah,

Things maybe hard now in life but actually it gets harder.. choices you make wont be the right ones but what you learn in the next 8 years is worth it because the knowledge will protect you in future. Trust no one but yourself.. keep being independant.. listen to yourself.. remain happy in your bubble!!