Don't know what do.

[pauline]

I'll keep this short as i can. just wondered what others have done when starting new relationships when you suffer with anxiety and panic. I find it hard to go far from home and somtimes just going not to far away i have anxiety and thats with my family who know me let alone trying to go on a date with someone. I have been on my own for 5 years last year i was so lonely that i made a promise to myself that i would not be on my own this new year, but so far i'm not doing well at all, its all my own fault i just don't go out anywhere so how am i going to meet someone lol.

Anyway i have friend who has given my number to a friend of theres who is single, She told him about me last year and she emailed him my number but he never got them he works away alot, Anyway on friday they met up for the first time since just after christmas last year and she gave him my mobile number, He has just rang me and left me a voicemail, but i am so scared even though i told her to give him my number now he has rang i think what the hell are you doing who the hell wants to get involved with someone like you a nervous wreck. I just think why even start anything in the first place. I have these worries going round and round in my head. Do you tell them how you are, do you not, most days i hate myself and hate having anxiety why carn't i just go out and enjoy myself but no i have to be this person who worries all the time.

Though i have grown up children i am on my own and would love to have someone to love and they love me, and if i don't do out with this guy i will not even know if it could work out. But do you tell them on the phone that you have anxiety when you have never even met them when they don't even know what you look like. That would put them of straight away surely. The trouble is i always like to be honest and i just feel better if someone knows that at times i might need to run away ha ha though mostly i do try and walk away anyone looking at me would never know i was this bag of nerves
Can anyone give me some kind advice.

[Vixxy]

First up, everyone deserves to be loved. Even horrid criminals meet people and they're locked up in prison! Now if they deserve it you sure as hell deserve it even more!
If your friend has told him about you, she would have probably mentioned your health problems and if he's rang then it's because he wants to get to know you. He obviously thinks you're worth a shot, so feel happy :) If he works away a lot my guess is he is probably lonely just like you and looking for a bit of love and affection from someone, just like you.
If you're scared to call him, then text him and start communication that way. Tell him your phone is playing up and would it be ok if you could just text for a while until you get it fixed. That way you get time to think about what he's saying and think of your own answers :)
Now onto your other question.
I would tell him. I met my husband online and we got together at exactly the same time as I had a breakdown. He thought I was worth the struggle, and has now been with me through a second breakdown. We're married now and the support I get is amazing. I don't have to pretend to be ok to hide it from him. If I'm anxious, then he helps.
Start the lines of conversation and gradually drop it in. Maybe ask if your friend told him about your health and see if he bites.
I really hope it goes well for you.
Good luck x

[pauline]

Thank you so much for that lovely reply. I'm meeting my friend later when we take our dogs for a walk. I will ask her what she has told him i feel that perhaps she has not told him what i'm like though she does know. we are new friends really as we both got talking when we got our dogs and were out walking them. x

[Vixxy]

No problem. Let me know how you get on :)