Avoidance. How can I tackle this? rsvp...

[zygfried]

Anyone troubled by this? After years of anxiety/depression this is what I excel at! Avoiding - anything that causes me the slightest bit of anxiety. So now when I'm not working, I keep going back to bed (sleep -wonderfully restorative, and a break from being in my head). This is the worst thing I can do, I think. I am well-rested, I don't need to go back to bed. I've got to face the things (getting work, tackling financial problems) that have triggered this bout of depression but I keep doing anything but. Like being on the internet! I'm overwhelmed but can't do anything about it.My house has exploded around me into hoarder/slob central. All these mental blocks. I could get a bloomin' degree in avoidance. What I need is action, I've got to start tackling my problems head on. Please help. Does anyone have any tips on how to avoid avoiding things? And now I'm constantly seeking reassurance......

help...

[Anxious_gal]

I did this for a while.
I got very bad anxiety and got depressed so I avoided everything, I loved my bed as it became my safe place, I loved sleeping and waking up relaxed and then going back to sleep.
I think I was trying to sleep away my problems. I felt Ia needed the rest.
But getting out and meeting people really made me feel better.

Get a routeine.
Get some paper, write which chores you will do daily and put a time limit on it,like washing the dishes must be done by 8 pm.
Then things such as every Sunday will clean bedroom, bathrooms on a Monday etc...

It sounds childish but it really works for me, sure sometimes I slip and get lazy but then i'll keep thinking oh i need to clean up.... the thinking about doing it is way worse than actually doing it!
Music is great for cleaning to!! it gets you in an energetic mood.

Maybe even have a reward if you finish all your chores at the end of the week?

[zygfried]

Thank you..I'll try it. I've been so busy getting in the trap of avoiding, then feeling bad about avoiding, and all the while the tasks are getting bigger and bigger in my mind. It's good to know what works so I'm going to try. A little at a time, right?! Thanks!

[rosa_j_t]

Yes, a little at a time. When I've tried tackling avoidance behaviour, I'll break it up into tiny steps. Try practicing mindfulness while you do it too (focusing entirely on the task at hand), I often find that helpful too. Whenever my thoughts stray to other things e.g. future etc, I say to myself, "I'll think about that later, first I have to do this" and keep bringing my attention back to whatever it is I'm doing.

In fact, cleaning is something I really enjoy now, as I can find it quite absorbing (my housemates are very happy too!)

[zygfried]

Thanks. My difficulty is awareness of how anxious tackling things makes me feel. It's as if when I try to do things all the negative thoughts and anxious feelings descend upon me at the one time and I feel like I can't cope. Interesting what you say about mindfulness. Perhaps by focussing instead on the task at hand the feelings will, I don't know, subside, be less overwhelming?
Don't think I'll ever enjoy cleaning, mind you!!!