Feeling awful, tearful & suicudal

[ziizii_81]

I have been on citalopram for 3 yrs now. A few weeks ago i decided i wanted to come off them as my hair was falling out. I feel exhausted all the time, in a world of my own, aches n pains & feeling like a have no personality any more. Bad memory. Making sillly mistakes. Lack of confidence amd generally feeling like my life is nothing short of pointless  i cut down to 5mg, hoping my body would get used to it eventually but i feel worse day by day. I feel suicidal and more useless than usual. It has been 3 weeks and i feel horrible, like i havent in a long time. I dont know if i should keep going or go back on them like my mum wants me to. She is becoming worried about me. I also never spoke to doctors first as i felt that they would want me to stay on them?? I dontt want to. I have had enough of feeling numb to the world. I suffer from depression and panic attacks and hadnot had panic attack in 3 months. I feel that i have always felt sad about my life and purpose. I dont kmowwhat to do. Some advice would be much appreciated xx my mum has battled with depression and panic attacks for many years and i cannot bare to be on them for the rest of my life...

[nomorepanic]

Hi ziizii_81

A huge warm welcome to nmp.

You'll get loads of advice and support here and make some lovely friends along the way.

Best wishes

[ziizii_81]

Thank you! I hope i can get some advice here from people who actually understand what i am going through :-/ x

[venusbluejeans]

Hiya and welcome to NMP I hope you find the help and advice here and maybe make a few friends in the process

:welcome:

[SDP]

Hey sorry to hear you having a hard time, I know exactly what your going through I'm currenly cutting back on my citalopram. I was on 40mg but cutting down to 20mg, this is my second attemp first time round i had to go back on them wasnt coping well without. This time im determind to ride it out that's the main reason I came back here so I don't have to go through it alone.
I know things will get worse for me as I drop my meds but it to be expected but I say is if your really feeling that low maybe make another appointment with the doctor get some advise.

[MikeyJon]

...maybe make another appointment with the doctor get some advise.


Also, are you seeing any sort of therapist? If not, I can recommend strongly enough that you do so. Just having someone who'll listen to your troubles and not judging can be of huge benefit to you. Also, a trained therapist knows when to dispense advice and when to remain quiet and listen.