hello

[boopster]

hello everyone,

i just joined this forum after searching high and low for a place i could just be myself, i have a lot of anxiety and seems to be ongoing torture at the min. My doc put me on citalapram 20mg on week 9 nine was going ok til this week now feels like am back at the beginning, anyone feel the same? :-(

[diane07]

Hi boopster

We just wanted to welcome you aboard to NMP. We hope you enjoy your stay here and get all the support and advice you need.

Please take some time to read the website articles on the left as well for loads of advice and tips.

[Bravedart]

Hi and :welcome:

Im on the same meds.... dont worry.. Its common to have blips for a short period of time. If you find your not feeling any better in a couple of weeks maybe return to docs to look at the dose. Its common for the dose to increase gradually.... I think 20mg is a popular starting dose and then dependant on the person this is increased gradually. Hopefully youll feel better soon.... Hang in there. Remember.... We aint weak for feeling like this, we've just been strong for to long :winks:

[boopster]

Hi thanks for your reply it does help but when you begin to lose faith in them when you feel like we do its hard to believe i am going to get better, i just want to be my old self. I take it the meds do take time?

[Bravedart]

Hiya

Yes they do take time and this varies greatly from person to person. The fact that you recognise you feel low this week seems to suggest they were having an affect beforehand? Hopefully this will return soon and youll continue to feel better as time passes. The thought of "I want to be back to my old self" is a thought i used to have every day however I found that made me feel lower when I thought about that so now I try not to and take each day as it comes.... Youll get there.... Its frustrating and can be soul destroying waiting to feel better.... But youll get there im sure :D

[boopster]

Thanks again i feel depression had lifted but anxiety is around was on them years ago but forgotten how long they took to make me feel good. I cant stop the thoughts from coming i read all about negative thinking but when anxious and full of fear they seem so real. Did you feel this and have you been on cit for long? :)

[Bravedart]

Yes..... I have the thoughts and they can be with me each day. Ive found distraction and trying as much as I can to keep busy helps. Ive also found that the more I fight the thoughts the more they come so I try and just let them come and wash over me if that makes sense? Ive been on Cit since December. Im 34 and never had any issues until December last year soooooooo The way I see it .... I never had this swine for 33 years and Ill be free of it in the future..... You should think that way too :winks:

[boopster]

I try to just let them come too and they were slowing down but they are so irrational scary you wonder why you think them they make you want to be sick, i want to scream at times i feel if anyone knew my thoughts they would think i was sick does that sound the same to you?

[Bravedart]

With out a shadow of a doubt.. Please dont let them scare you.... They are soooo scary but if you let them.... they will continue to scare you and thats what increases the anxiety. What you describe is a mirror image of me so dont worry. You get the thoughts.... Think what the hell is wrong with me? Why am I thinking these things? Am I going mad? If anyone knew they would disown me or have me carted off..... I get these too, your not alone trust me...... Oh and most importantly... your not going mad or sick your just super sensitive to everything right now... Try not to worry, I have bad days too but you are strong and will be cool Im sure :shades:.....

[boopster]

Thanks for your advice again, woke up today after 7 hours sleep which was restless but slept. And bang its there again, did you increase your dose and did you get side effects again or not? sorry about going on a bit but answers to this does help me... :-)

[Bravedart]

Hiya

Sorry Im at work and usually dont get messages till after 6pm.... But..... Im cheating and came on here during work :ohmy:.... Everyone is different with the increase in meds, some people get em, some dont. I think you said the initial introduction of your meds went ok so hopefully any increase in dose produces the same for you.... Very little side effects :winks:... Id still give it a while to make sure your not having a very short blip before you go back to docs for an increase as I said last night. I also wondered how your doc is monitoring you on the meds? Do you not have staggered appointments scheduled to check on your progress?

I hope your ok and Ill be around later tonight if you need owt :)

[boopster]

Hi again thanks my doctor is a nightmare to get a hold of but i got a telephone call from him today and he says try a few more weeks before upping them he offered councilling or psychology but not sure i can wait or want the waiting lists are horrendous. I know all about anxiety and where i am coming from its just keeping it alive with my little fears :unsure: