mrmuji
11-10-11, 15:36
Hellooooooo
Well, where do I start? I guess as long as I can remember I have had persistent anxiety, mostly focussed on my health. At times it has had little impact on my life but at others it has had such a profound impact that the repercussions have been quite severe. In trying to write this I am trying to reflect on my typical behaviour and the sorts of things I have done - when anxious about my health. One word comes to mind - checking!!! I would check (typically lumps or moles) 40-100 times a day but never feeling satisfied so would check again. I do checking behaviour in other aspects of my life - and would deffo say I am OCD about that (sometimes I check plugs in the kitchen 20 times before i can leave). However, it is in the health arena that it really floors me. For example, early this year I noticed a mole I thought had changed (as it turned out it hadn't) and I went into an utter panic - tears, shaking, hysterical behaviour - well beyond anything that one might consider 'normal'. This has happened more and more in the past few years and I am not sure if turning 40 has made it worse. I tend to focus on things around my face, arms, groin - but occasionally I worry about other types of illness but it is almost exclusively an anxiety focussed on 'cancer signs' - or what I perceive to be possible signs of cancer.
I could ramble on about how it has affected me - but I have decided to try and confront it, deal with and learn from others. If anyone has any similar experiences please reply or email - i'd just like to know that someone else has experienced this too and I am not the 'nutter' that my soon to be ex -thinks I am (yes - I have lost my relationship because of this too).
with thanks,
Neil
Well, where do I start? I guess as long as I can remember I have had persistent anxiety, mostly focussed on my health. At times it has had little impact on my life but at others it has had such a profound impact that the repercussions have been quite severe. In trying to write this I am trying to reflect on my typical behaviour and the sorts of things I have done - when anxious about my health. One word comes to mind - checking!!! I would check (typically lumps or moles) 40-100 times a day but never feeling satisfied so would check again. I do checking behaviour in other aspects of my life - and would deffo say I am OCD about that (sometimes I check plugs in the kitchen 20 times before i can leave). However, it is in the health arena that it really floors me. For example, early this year I noticed a mole I thought had changed (as it turned out it hadn't) and I went into an utter panic - tears, shaking, hysterical behaviour - well beyond anything that one might consider 'normal'. This has happened more and more in the past few years and I am not sure if turning 40 has made it worse. I tend to focus on things around my face, arms, groin - but occasionally I worry about other types of illness but it is almost exclusively an anxiety focussed on 'cancer signs' - or what I perceive to be possible signs of cancer.
I could ramble on about how it has affected me - but I have decided to try and confront it, deal with and learn from others. If anyone has any similar experiences please reply or email - i'd just like to know that someone else has experienced this too and I am not the 'nutter' that my soon to be ex -thinks I am (yes - I have lost my relationship because of this too).
with thanks,
Neil