Supposed to be going out but don't want to...now feel like I'm letting people down

[GirlAfraid23]

My friends and I have been planning a night out for a while now. It was supposed to be this Friday and I actually agreed to it a few weeks ago because it seemed like ages away and I'd cross the bridge when I came to type attitude.

They are going somewhere that I'm really not keen on. Its a nightclub and its going to take us a while to get there and back.
Part of the reason I don't want to go is the money...its going to cost alot and I just don't have that at the moment.

Also, I now hate clubbing and I'm always worried about people around me. I tend to drink too much and feel awful the next day and I actually have work the next day at 8am in the morning.

I have let my friends know that I'm not going and haven't heard anything back from them. I'm really worried I have let them down. Should I just be honest with them? That I don't like clubbing anymore? The idea of it fills me with dread and worrying about getting up early the next day.
I don't want my friends to be upset with me though.

[WillyB]

Missing one night out with your friends will not harm your relationships I'm sure they'll understand just fine, even if they are a bit let down. But really, its just not worth it, i wouldn't even consider going to the pub if i had work at 8 the next morning.

I'd somehow let them know you hate clubbing, that way they wont be expecting you to go in the future, which will put less pressure on you. I hate clubbing too, and i let me friends know all the time.

Take it easy :)

[Littlehelper123]

just tell them the truth =) Say to them that you can't afford it right now and if they want to go let them go - and just arrange to do something with them another day =) xxx

[GirlAfraid23]

That would normally make sense but my friends just take it to heart and also keep bringing it up for ages after. Usually acting annoyed. I dont really understand it

[Littlehelper123]

don't worry my friends do this too. The best thing you can do is just explain to them that you can't help it and that you will make it up to them by inviting them round for a pizza or something =) thats what i would do. If you can't do that then just offer to meet them for a coffee somewhere for a gossip =) Just tell them that you really can't stand clubbing xxx If they don't understand then they aren't friends. I chucked two of my best friends because they accused me of emotionally blackmailing them by saying things like "by you shouting at me its only going to make me worse" ....its horrible because unless they've had what we have , they will never understand.


Keep your head high, let me know what happens, because I know how to deal with non-understanding friends lol


xxx take care xxx

[evil monkey]

When I have needed to do this, tbh my attention has been more on myself than them. If i know I've got a good reason to avoid something....my attention has usually been on trying to sort myself out, rather than them for the evening. For the longer question about what they think and their opinion....hopefully they either 'understand'. if they don't, then,,,,what was the question ?

[selphie]

if they are real friends then they should understand.
be honest tell the truth thats the best way i would they would understand if there really good friend.

i hate clubbing also always to cramped and noisy and vey expensive.
you do what you want you have to think of yourselve go out when your up to it.xxxxx:hugs: