new here

[Attsila]

I have actually been using this site for a week or so and it has been a lifesaver. It is conforting to know that you aren't alone in the world when you are going through this. I have suffered panic disorder on and off most my life. It reared it's ugly head as school phobia when I was younger. My dad died when I was 16 and a year later I started having panic attacks. I think that is the first time I went through it and recognized it as panic disorfer for a few weeks I was scared of dying. I came to terms with my own mortality and it really scared me. After going to a Chiropractor and starting to go to church it eventually went away although I don't know how. Then when I was 20 after my 1st son was born it came back. I had a case of hives and went to the ER. a few weeks later I had what I thought was a heart attack. Well the doctors sent me home. I remember laying on the bathroom floor in pain thinking I was gonna die and fighting to be ok. I think I drove my family crazy for a month and even wanted to move away(I didn't though) and slowly it went away. I had my youngest son shortly after that. It has been 7 years and since then I have been fine. I am a single mom that works and goes to school. about a month and a half ago panic krept it's way back in. After a series of stressful events involving work and my personal life and losing a friend in a crash in Iraq, I started having panic attacks at work. At first I recognized them and laughed them off. Then slowly 1 turned into 2 then to 4.Well I made the mistake of looking up symptoms one day and for some reason Rabies came up on the search engine. Well I had been scratched by a raccoon a week before the attacks started so I was sure that that had to be the reason. It didn't matter how may doctors and health people told me I was fine I couldn't get rabies from a scratch. I didn't want to believe them. I was even scared to drink water because I had manifested swallowingg pproblems from my fear. I did go for tons of medical tests and I did find out that my gallbladder needs to be removed.The doctor put me on Lexapro which caused my anxiety to get worse and caused me to have suicidal and obbsessive thoughts, I took my self off the medicine and have gone from being in a perpetual state of anxiety with swallowing disirders, heart palpitations, nausea, sleeplessness and jerking awake, bad feelings of depersonalization/derealization, numbness all over my body and tremors, fear of dying and other various physical symptoms. to now it is ever so often during the day. I am finally sleeping some and I started seeing a therapist. I want to beat this without meds as I did before. I had 2 emergency room visits last week in which I was told I was fine. but I was scared I wasn't and they were lying.. I am finding it hard to function in my job as I have a boss that isn't as understanding as most and I have obsessive thoughts of something bad happening to me or of me hurting someone else. I have once again started back to church with my boys and that has helped some. I get afraid because whenever I am in trouble and pray I usually feel God there. I think I am afraid this time because I either don't or I just don't feel anything. I also get scared because I still have nerves about drinking water and I used to LOVE water. I also have gone through a drastic change in my diet because of my gallbladder problems and I just don't enjoy food like I did before and that scares me. I have already lost 10 lbs (I'm 5'5 113).
I get caught up in the thought cycle that I will never be normal again but I know I must have felt that way before I just can't remember and I can't remember how and why it wwent away. I am sure it will go away just hope it does soon. I don't want to think of gloom and doom all the time and Iall I want is to be normal so I can be a good mom to my kids. I spend so much time feeliing discinnected and worrying about something happening to me that I haven't enjoyed any of my time with them or any of my family. This site has helped to bring a tremendous relief though. a Week ago I

[KGreen]

Hi Attsila,
I like your last line that worrying is like a rocking chair and it won't get you anywhere.
I hear you on your obsessiveness and I hope that we both can find some help on this forum. After reading some of the site, I can see myself in a lot of what's described for OCD. You may want to read those sections also.
It's good that you got appropriate medical help and discovered your gallbladder problem.
KGreen

[Miss Pink]

Hi Attsila[8D],

Welcome to the site. Your story sounds so much like a lot of peoples on here and I'm sorry to hear your anxiety has returned again.

I'm glad that you are finding the site helpful, I'm sure you will get loads of support form lots of people in the same situation as yourself. You summed up everybody's fear when you said that you fear never being normal again. Just try and think - you've done it before (congratulations for that) and so you must DEFINATELY be able to do it again. It just needs a little time, patience and support - which I'm sure people will be very willing to give you on here.

Wishing you the best of luck


Just thought I'd say welcome, Take care

Rachael xxx

PS I thought I caught Rabies once from a stray Labrador ......we don't have anything as exotic as raccoons in the middle of England !!! lol [:X][8D][:X]

[jackie]

hi and welcome, i love your wee quote and am sorry to see this horrible thing raise its head again

but you must get comfort from the fact that youve beaten it once and you can do it again

id so love to beat this fear ive had for the past 4 years or more and want you to know that we are all here for you

jackie

[Alexandra]

Hi Hun

Welcome to the forum.

My panic attacks started at 11 years old so i know what you mean re school phobia.

Take Care

Alex

Many People Will Walk
In & Out Of Your Life
But Only True Friends
Will Leave Footprints
In Your Heart

[trac67]

Hi,

Welcome to the forum, you will get a lot of good advice here and make some new friends.

Take care
Trac xx

'Live your life with arms wide open, today is where your book begins, the rest is still unwritten'

[giddy]

Welcome to the site, stay strong, you've beaten this more than once and will do again.
Love Helen

[Daisybun]

Hi and welcome to the site, you will find lots of support here. It is really helpful to talk through with people who are going through, or who have been through, simialr things. As many have said you beat it before and you can do it again, I've beaten it before and I'm trying hard again. i too go to church and find that it helps a lot, faith keeps me going at times.
Anyway there's lots of info and advice here so please use it to help you.
take care


Daisybun


'This too will pass'

[shiv]

Hello and welcome to the forum.

I to have had this on and off for years: 12 in fact. I beat it the first time and the second time and now I've beaten it a third (and final!!) time mostly thanks to the support from people on here.

I too have never gone down the meds route- I've been lucky enough to conquer it every time without them. I feel that they're a short term solution but of course, absolutely necessary for people who's panic is so bad they cannot function.
I hope you stick with us and I know that if you've beaten it before you WILL do so again.

Shiv x

[Karen]

Hi Attsila

Welcome to the forum.

You might find the following information helpful:

First Steps (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/default.asp?t=cms&c=firststeps)

Symptoms (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/default.asp?t=cms&c=symptoms)

Health Anxiety (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/default.asp?t=cms&c=healthanxiety)

Links post: Links to posts about Common Problems (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=7784)

You will find a lot of help and support here.


Karen



Happiness is not a state to arrive at but a manner of travelling.

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough ~ Christine Cagney, Cagney & Lacey

[bernadette]

hi i have panic attacks i have had them for 20 years now i no wot you r talking about if you need to talk its bernadette

[scoobygirl2005]

Hi.

Welcome to the site. You will find lots of help and support here.

Scooby2005
x x

[Attsila]

Thank you to all of you for your support. I feel honored and blessed to have discovered this site. Thank you for all your well wishes and kindness. I am sure that I WILL beat this again and I can't wait. I am doing much better then I was and even though I had a few attacks today I managed to breathe through them and talk them away before they got out of hand. I know I didn't get this way overnight as I know I am an overacheiver, so I know it won't go away overnight. I am currently off all meds including the steroid that was given to me for adrenal fatigue. I am taking B vitamins, magnesium, and fish oil on top of the dietary changes that I have had to conform to due to my gallbladder. I also drink a lot of chamomile tea and I started writing in a journal. So far so good. I will take 4 or 5 manageable attacks a day over being in constant fear and anxiety 24/7. I owe a large part of my improvement to this site because whenever I start to worry I knew I could come here and read what others had written and I would feel better. Thanks to you all again :-)

worrying is alot Like a Rocking Chair It is something todo but it won't get you anywhere