How can I let go of this and get back to the way I was?

[Natalie x]

Hi. I'm just on here to basically say how I am feeling at the moment. For the past couple of months, I have been worrying non stop about things to do with my work. Every single day I come home worrying about something, worrying if I have done things right or wrong, said the wrong thing, all the 'what if's' popping into my head and haunting me everyday. I began to get very paranoid about situations a couple of months back and I feel the same is happening. I can't get up in the morning feeling relaxed, go to work and come home with a clear head. I am also at college part time, working full time which I am finding a strain to do college work on top of trying to complete college work. I feel exhausted with the worry and worry about the worry. I just wish i could go back to the way I was before. I am only 20 and shouldn't be this way and should be out doing normal things and enjoying myself. My boyfriend is very supportive and tend to tell him things rather than go to my family as I tend to bottle things up. He always tells me I don't need to worry but he doesn't understand what it's like. Every day is something else. I feel selfish as I know there are worse things in the world. I just tend to take things on board and worry about everything, as I previously mentioned mostly about work.

Can anyone relate to this or offer some words of wisdom? Sorry if it's a bit muffled.

Thanks x

[ElizabethJane]

You cannot go back to the way you were only forward I am afraid. Have you spoken to your GP about these feelings? Is there a counsellor at college you could see? Perhaps you are trying to do too much trying to work as well as going to college? Maybe you need to look at what needs to be done and the things that you could drop for a while to reduce your stress? EJ

[theharvestmouse]

I wish I could go back to how I was but like ElizabethJane said you can only look forward. At least you have a supportive boyfriend, but maybe you should tell your family as well.

[Natalie x]

Thanks for your replies. There is a college counseler but I don't really want to talk to them or go back to my GP. I went through CBT last year and the start of this year but I feel I am having a blip. I had been doing so well. I think it's the pressure of work and college, however I am in my last year at college and only have until May when I will be finishing so I won't have long to go. I just want to be free of worrying and be able to let my mind relax instead of being constantly uptight. You are both right, I can't go backwards - can only go forward x