MaryMac
25-11-11, 00:12
Hi everyone. :) Just a general question here. I've noticed that in the last few months, (since I split with my boyfriend), I've spent alot more time online. At first I enjoyed it, I didn't have to go out anywhere, I could do what I wanted etc. But to be honest it has gotten to the point where I've stopped going out and seeing my friends at night, I'm in my PJ's and dressing gown around about 8pm and this is when I go online.
More recently my fear has been leukemia. I'm up pretty much the entire night looking up symptoms, checking my body for signs etc. My anxiety has gotten so severe with doing this. I wake up alone in the morning and think "oh I feel great!" Then I remember the leukemia symptoms and I start freaking out.
I KNOW that this is a result of having too much time alone. I've found myself craving other people's presence so that I can be distracted. And it takes a few minutes but it works. I saw my cousins this morning, and I was in a proper state. They were doing all they could to reassure me that I don't have leukemia, but I sort of felt disconnected from them for a while, but as the day went on I started feeling good again. I've started going out every night instead of sitting in alone, but when I get home, of course I'm googling leukemia again! AND getting symptoms! Which I know are probably anxiety symptoms but I'm sitting here shaking away anyway.
So my point is, does anyone else find that being alone makes you feel worse? And you'll do just about anything to be in other people's company?
More recently my fear has been leukemia. I'm up pretty much the entire night looking up symptoms, checking my body for signs etc. My anxiety has gotten so severe with doing this. I wake up alone in the morning and think "oh I feel great!" Then I remember the leukemia symptoms and I start freaking out.
I KNOW that this is a result of having too much time alone. I've found myself craving other people's presence so that I can be distracted. And it takes a few minutes but it works. I saw my cousins this morning, and I was in a proper state. They were doing all they could to reassure me that I don't have leukemia, but I sort of felt disconnected from them for a while, but as the day went on I started feeling good again. I've started going out every night instead of sitting in alone, but when I get home, of course I'm googling leukemia again! AND getting symptoms! Which I know are probably anxiety symptoms but I'm sitting here shaking away anyway.
So my point is, does anyone else find that being alone makes you feel worse? And you'll do just about anything to be in other people's company?