advice badly needed plz!!!! :(

[missykat]

hi. i really don't know where to be posting this but it has been causing me great anxiety and stress. ok, long story. me and my ex partner split 8 months ago, we were never married. we have a 23 month old daughter together.he wud visit her regulary but in july he suddenly stopped visiting her after we had a fall out. he just seemingly dropped off the face of the earth and my poor child hasn't seen him now in about 5 months! so, out of the blue i get this court order in the door. 'notice of application under section 11(4) of the guardianship of infants act 1964 i have appear in january. however im confused to what this all means? does this mean that he is seeking custody of my child?? when he has no right whatsoever when he just disappeared like that. i'm really upset and angry and confused. he has been paying me maintanence forthnightly, this has however stopped this week! so what does this all really mean? does it mean he wants to have sole rights and responsibilities to her or just access?? and do i have a right to not consent to any of this and only consent to access? somebody please enlighten me, im so confused and lost! i live in th republic of ireland.

[happydylbob]

Hello
I don't really know much about this, but I understand it must be an awful worry for you. From what I understand you have been the constant in your daughters life, I don't think he stands a chance of getting sole rights, the only reason for this would be if she were in any danger. Can you get hold of him to speak to him and maybe try some kind of mediation?

You may be able to try looking on the Citizens advice website, although I don't know if it is the same in Ireland.

[missykat]

i have spoken to him about this and he stated that the only way he will see his daughter is when it is finalised in the court. so he isn't open to reason. i have looked at a few sites and have found that gurdianship to an unmarried father has to be signed by the mother and give her consent. if i do not wish to give my consent then the courts will decide. i do not think he deserves to have this responsibilty of my daughter! he has been out of her life for many months and the poor child missed him badly. have honestly never heard from him until yesterday after nearly 6 months! i'm really stressed out about it. and having to find a solicitor in such a short space of time. i don't mid him having acces. thanks for your input! much appreciated

[Rod]

I would be getting some legal advice on this. I think you have a very good arguement on this one but you do need good legal advice. Try not to worry about the what ifs.