My Wife....

[Meewah]

Whenever My wife says she has indigestion or heart burn I get a hit of fear and go inside myself and begin worrying about what will happen if she is ill or terminally ill. My worry is the symptoms that hit me like a brick wall really worry me. She does not like going to the doctors for anything. She grin and bares it and does not really talk about symptoms or medical issues. I think this is true but as I have anxiety it may be that my level of talking about and seeing the docs is very high in comparison. May be she is normal and I over react with everything but I do not know. I feel my anxiety is preferred to her blasé attitude the only problem is the stress it can put my body under.

If something really did happen I really fear how I would cope with my three young boys??


Can anyone help me who has any experience of this.

Mee

[Meewah]

Oh Well does no body share my worry about losing someone? I,m up again 5.30am laid in bed worrying about my wifes health. Strange how mine worries me in a different way, as in what effect it will have on my family if I am ill or a burden. I watched Hillary Deville story on TV last night and that oiled the cogs within, started me thinking about health again. May be this thread is in the wrong heading?? Someone must empathise with me.

Anyone??

Mee

[louis]

Dear friend,
It is only natural that you should think of this when the main souce of security is someone who can be taken or can leave. As much as you love and treasure your spouse put your faith in Jesus as a safe haven. he wont leave or fail you ever and he will let you be there for your loved ones so you can stop your worry about the future . That is secure for you and anyone else who follows him.
Feel free to reply and ask me about this subject or any other here on the forum or in private.
Louis

[eeyorelover]

Hi Mee,
I worry too about the people around me passing away.
Part of it is because I am a born worrier.
Sometimes I worry about things that are sooooooo remote they are just silly but when it comes to facing the finite time we have with the one's we love, it's not a remote concept.
Eventually we will all pass on.
It's a fact.
AND SCARY AS HELL!!!

I don't say that flippantly and am not trying to make you more scared but really the only thing we can do is love the people around us and try to keep them healthy and happy for as long as we are on this earth.

I would suggest that you share how you are feeling with your spouse and suggest she get a check up just for a preventative measure.
I'm sure she's fine but everyone should have a yearly check up.
xxx
Sandy

[Meewah]

Thanks Louis.

Worrying about the future only effects the present. Its just in this case I can help my loved ones to better health. I need advice on how to approach the subject and how to see it through.

I understand that when nothing else can help in a situation then blind faith in a super natural power can reduce the anxiety felt. I prefer to help her not opt out. Me I prefer the truth things that I can touch and feel and see and taste. Just imagine if the medical professionals only used faith to cure us?

Ignorance isn't an option.

Mee

---------- Post added at 07:21 ---------- Previous post was at 06:51 ----------

Thanks Sandy

The problem is she sees me as worrying too much which I do. So if I ask her to visit the docs then she replies with I worry too much. Sometimes I feel she may not tell me if she feels ill just in case I worry. Very complicated I know.

Sometimes I feel it must be easier living alone with no attachment to anyone but that would be so sad not to share lifes up's and downs with anyone.

Mee

[eeyorelover]

I think we have all thought that at least once in our lives! You are right though it would be sad not to have that love for someone in our life!

Maybe something like "I know you think I worry too much and you are probably right but it would take away some of that worry if you would go and get a check up".

Honest and simple request.
xxx
Sandy

[Meewah]

Yes

Your right, Sometimes I just find it hard to talk about anything negative in our relationship. I feel everybody should live life an not be judged. I try to be supportive but I find it hard to watch if someone close is not living like I feel I should. All this makes it look like I do all the right things but no I know I should exercise more and I will, I need to loose a few pounds etc etc. Its just doesn't seem as important as my wife and kids health.

To protect her, I try to avoid anything about my worrying. If she says are you OK I reply yes, but inside I am not. I suppose I put up a façade. Sounds crazy but I worry about her worrying about me.

Thanks for the reply.

Mee

[Meewah]

Does anyone feel like me or even share my struggle?