View Full Version : Depersonalization/Derealization/Disorder/Depression or hormones?[Please help]

30-12-11, 21:15
Hello and Merry Xmas to everyone.The last 4 days(including this one) I have been through very-in my opinion- difficult situation concerning my psychologyI am a teenager at the age of 14. It started on 27 December, after going a walk alone to the city centre. When I got home, I suddenly questioned myself "Wow.Why do I have a sister?Why do we exist?Is me me and my mother my mother?". Such questions kept my mind busy for the rest of the day. The day after(28 December) this I started to feel anxious about if those things were real. I spent most of my day in my house but I got out with a friend without being concerned much about the subject. However, after I returned home and went to sleep, I was thinking of my simple,innocent things I done,like walking out, and got really anxious about whether they were real or not,to such extent that I think I had a panic attack. My heart went faster, I felt my stomach and those are feelings I get when I am very afraid of something.Now here is the thing.I do NOT I repeat I do NOT suffer from disorders such as anxiety,depression,derealization disorder,schizofreneia etc. I have not been diagnosed with such disorders. However, the time I am writing this thread, I am really scared that I have one of those disorders. Let me continue on December 29 where the depersonalization feeling started. I felt like I am leaving in a dream. Like I knew my parents were my parents but..what if they are not?I do not mean something that I am adopted. Also, I slightly feel that when I look myself into the mirror I know it is me but what if it is not me? IT SCARES ME A LOT. I spent the whole day(29 December) and the other, searching for what the hell do I have and I think I do have depersonalization or derealization. I have also read around here some encouraging posts that it is nothing and it is a common symptom. Wait wait, I do not even have a disorder for it to be a symptom because I have not been diagnosed with it in previous psychological exams. So do I conclude that I have a depersonalization disorder on its own, which is rare?:scared15: I really hope I have nothing but I very doubt. You know, I would not be so scared if this thing happened to me another time because tomorrow is New Year's Eve and I DO NOT WANT TO BE LIKE HOW I AM NOW. I am scared that I will spend my whole life on pills and on therapies which will not work. I am scared I will have that persistent feeling that my life is a dream and everything is weird.:scared15: I want to live my life again,not survive it. I was never so pessimistic than I am right now. I was always optimistic with health situations but this one has made me lost all of it(being optimistic).Please tell me what do I have?Will I have this feeling for days,weeks,months,years,decades?Will my whole life consist of this?It is not that makes me cry but has scared the shit out of me.

Some additional details

-I am 14(Could it be hormones changing or something?)
-I think I might have depression because I have no mood for anything plus that I have lost a little interest for PCs which was my favorite interest.
-I have stopped addictive-PC use from 25 December (Could that affect me?)
-I do NOT suffer from any disorders such as anxiety or depression due to psychologicals tests.
-I currently cannot visit a psychologist or doctor,as my mother is gong to make an appoiment for a psychologist the next week.
-This whole feeling happens for no reason. No reason at all. No one has abused me, I have not smoked pot, I have no disorders. Nothing at all.
-I feel that my life is like a dream for the past 4 days.
-I cannot ignore it.It is very difficult for me.Whatever I do, I feel that I do it just to stop feeling like that.


1.What the hell do I have? =|
2.Do I have some very serious disorder such as depression?
3.Will I feel like that for entire months or years?
4.Am I going crazy?
5.Will I ever be able to be fine again soon, or I will have to be like that for many months or years?
6.If I recover from it, will it ever get back?
7.Can this feeling be very dangerous?
8.Can it lead me to being sufferer of mental disorders?
9.Will I spend my whole life with this?
10.Why did it happen in such days that I was very happy at?
11.Will I have to face it by going to therapists and taking medicine?
12.Why everything I do to stop thinking of it makes me again feel I do it just for it to go away?

Thanks for being patient to read this, I appreciate every advice.

I just want to be fine, soon.


30-12-11, 21:21
The best thing to do is to write all this down, and take it to the pyschologist when you go to see them. There are so many things can cause mental health problems and different emotions, feelings etc.. all we can do is guess.

30-12-11, 21:38
The best thing to do is to write all this down, and take it to the pyschologist when you go to see them. There are so many things can cause mental health problems and different emotions, feelings etc.. all we can do is guess.
Thanks for your answer. So you do not rule out that I might suffer from a serious mental illnes,right?

30-12-11, 21:41
It could be, it could also be a temporary thing that can be easily sorted out, but once you get it checked then you will know exactly what you are dealing with and can get the appropriate help. Guessing or imagining what you could have in advance isn't really going to do any good, and will make you worry more. Better to make a note of all the things you are feeling every day, then you can take this with you to the pyschologist which will make it easier for them to diagnose you.

31-12-11, 12:55
If anyone wants to post here to help me,please don't hesitate to do so.

31-12-11, 18:11
hi, firstly i would like to say derealisation is a very scary experience it is not permanent and it will pass either on its own or via therapy.

i dont know whats caused it for you, do you go out often, socialise etc? have you got alot of things on your mind? Have you been stressing more than usual recently? did someone in your life pass away recently or when you was younger? (it could be a delayed reaction).

01-01-12, 11:32
you may not think you have anxiety, but most derealization and DP does not exist with out it, i have it im only 16 mate i know how you feel, it will get better, your not going mad and you wont be stuck like it forever, do not panic, it is ONLY anxiety http://www.derealization.org/my-experience/derealization-cured-my-story

Read this will help you, take care mate

01-01-12, 18:48
Thanks for the replies. :) I read this article but on the journey part I got anxious. I want to get rid of it in some days, I cannot imagine my life with it. :( At 9/1 school begins and I don't wanna get on it like I am dead. Will I have to be like that for many weeks? :'/

---------- Post added at 15:41 ---------- Previous post was at 14:30 ----------

I am reading stories of people who have this for years. Also wikipedia says that if you persistently feel depersonalized you might have depersonalization disorder. I am very very scared at the moment do I have this disorder? Damn,nothing has happened to me I was always healthy! I don't wanna be like that anymore :'(

---------- Post added at 17:48 ---------- Previous post was at 15:41 ----------

Guys I need urgent help. Because of New Year's day I am unable to contact a psychologist. I am so scared right now, I read on CNN that if you have depersonalization 24/7 which I do, you are suffering from the disorder. Also it says that you are at risk if you face depersonalization on middle teenage years or early adulthood. What the hell, I don't wanna be like that I just want and NEED this feeling to get out!I did have nothing to have this,why do I deserve it?I don't want to spend my life doing therapies for years and stuff..I want my depersonalization be cured on a week or so..I cannot imagine having it for months.:scared15::cry:

04-02-13, 12:12
hey i have very similar thoughts about life too and im sick of this shit after 2 yrs dr dont get it anyways and anti depressents made it worse i battle on for my kids and i have turned into the best actress ever :) but also feel like life isnt life anymore so sick of wasting it lately ive put it down to a brain glitch which will sort itself soon hopefully if u find any solutions lemmee know please :mad: