hallam11
01-01-12, 16:35
Hi there everyone,
Some on here may remember me from a few years back. I was having a pretty rotten time and coming on here helped me to speak with other like minded people. I got well and got a new job and even went abroad to work for a while. Now I'm back home for the winter, I did get a Christmas Temp job but that finished so now I am looking for work again....when I am out of work and have a lot of time on my hands then I tend to start worrying again. The worries have started....luckily I still remember a lot of my counselling and different methods to help me cope but I thought it may help to come on here and speak about it.
There's a lot of stuff going around my head that is difficult to put into words a lot of the time and also my feelings and emotions are everywhere.
I have a hard time with my family, my sister and I get on, kind of, but she's married and her husband is quite difficult...very opinionated, racist, narrow minded etc. So I don't spend a lot of time around them plus I live with my mum which is another hardship, which I hate to say, but she's a very negative person. My dad left the family when I was 14, I am now 25 and she is still not over it, she still goes on about it, blames him for everything etc etc. Needless to say I can't and won't speak to my family about this - I did try as some of my illness is or has aspects of OCD and when I spoke to them about it they just laughed at me. Not really that funny from my point of view.
I guess the main reason I came on here today is because a question has been going around my head all day - sometimes I will read something like a news story and I have that many feelings that I can't pinpoint one or I have no feelings. I don't know which one it is. I try to decipher after what I was feeling but I cant and so I come up with the worst case scenario. Like I was reading about this celebrity who'd had a miscarriage - I have a crush on her husband and I came across this story when I was reading about him and I don't know what I felt but then I got scared thinking what if I was glad she had lost the baby? What kind of a person does that make me? And this is usually the kind of way my mind works. So the question is does anyone ever find it hard to pinpoint what they are feeling?
Sorry for the long ramble!
Laura x
Some on here may remember me from a few years back. I was having a pretty rotten time and coming on here helped me to speak with other like minded people. I got well and got a new job and even went abroad to work for a while. Now I'm back home for the winter, I did get a Christmas Temp job but that finished so now I am looking for work again....when I am out of work and have a lot of time on my hands then I tend to start worrying again. The worries have started....luckily I still remember a lot of my counselling and different methods to help me cope but I thought it may help to come on here and speak about it.
There's a lot of stuff going around my head that is difficult to put into words a lot of the time and also my feelings and emotions are everywhere.
I have a hard time with my family, my sister and I get on, kind of, but she's married and her husband is quite difficult...very opinionated, racist, narrow minded etc. So I don't spend a lot of time around them plus I live with my mum which is another hardship, which I hate to say, but she's a very negative person. My dad left the family when I was 14, I am now 25 and she is still not over it, she still goes on about it, blames him for everything etc etc. Needless to say I can't and won't speak to my family about this - I did try as some of my illness is or has aspects of OCD and when I spoke to them about it they just laughed at me. Not really that funny from my point of view.
I guess the main reason I came on here today is because a question has been going around my head all day - sometimes I will read something like a news story and I have that many feelings that I can't pinpoint one or I have no feelings. I don't know which one it is. I try to decipher after what I was feeling but I cant and so I come up with the worst case scenario. Like I was reading about this celebrity who'd had a miscarriage - I have a crush on her husband and I came across this story when I was reading about him and I don't know what I felt but then I got scared thinking what if I was glad she had lost the baby? What kind of a person does that make me? And this is usually the kind of way my mind works. So the question is does anyone ever find it hard to pinpoint what they are feeling?
Sorry for the long ramble!
Laura x