am I schizophrenic / crazy?!? [Archive]

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 00:05

I've been getting a LOT of depersonalisation/ derealisation recently and my memory has been terrible! I keep getting muddled up and forgetting things but just now I've completely got my dreams mixed up with reality. For example; I sat and thought about a ride out in the car with my mum and I was like did that really happen today or is it a dream/thought? I also really can't think properly/clearly... I feel like I'm going crazy!? What's wrong with me? Is this anxiety and panic playing tricks? This is horrible! :/ please someone help! I feel like I'm in a dream world :/ xx

nomorepanic

03-01-12, 00:07

I can tell you that it is not schizophrenia that is for sure.

It is all anxiety based thoughts

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 00:09

Really!? xx thanks for your reply

nomorepanic

03-01-12, 00:23

It will calm down in time when your anxiety subsides.

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 08:59

It's not really going away and I'm really worried :( how do you know that it's not schizophrenia? Xx

nomorepanic

03-01-12, 09:39

I work with someone with Schizophrenia and you are not showing the classic signs/issues that would make me think it is that.

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 10:36

I've woken up this morning feeling a totally different person though, almost like I'm not me and I've been stupid an looked on google and it comes up with schizophrenia, I'm so so worried xx

---------- Post added at 10:29 ---------- Previous post was at 10:22 ----------

I'm terrified that I've got it, I'm terrified I will develop voices in my head that will control what I do! Is this anxiety or have I actually got schizophrenia ??! xx

---------- Post added at 10:36 ---------- Previous post was at 10:29 ----------

I'm having really scary thoughts, :( :( I've rang my doctor and she's going to call me back, I just don't feel like me and I'm scared it's because I've got schizophrenia :( :( has anybody had this? xx

nomorepanic

03-01-12, 12:20

I still say this is not schizophrenia.

It is anxiety and depersonalisation and derealization

premiumpackaging2

03-01-12, 12:37

No argument with Nicola, but what would be really helpful for a diagnostic appraisal would be a description of your present circumstances, a list of any medications that you are being described (and are you taking those?) and any substances that may not be legal..

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 13:01

I'm not on any medication or taking anything illeagal. Do you think I've got schizophrenia then? xx

nomorepanic

03-01-12, 13:06

Put it this way if you think you have it then you don't because you wouldn't even know you had it if that makes sense.

The fact that you are questioning if you have it or not also confirms to me that you don't.

crystal17

03-01-12, 14:31

As far as I know, worrying about developing a serious mental illness is a common sign of anxiety/depression.
I know someone who I believe has some very serious mental health issues and she says that she is perfectly fine and its everyone else who has the problem and is out to 'get' her.

lizamoran

03-01-12, 18:40

You're definitely not full-blown schizophrenic. If you were, you wouldn't be self-aware enough to ask us about it.

If you were in the quite early stages of schizophrenia, there'd be more symptoms. For example, you might feel depressed or experience some functional decline. I encourage you to google 'prodromal schizophrenia', because I think in this instance googling would assuage your fears instead of increasing them.

This might be helpful: http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Schizophrenia/Pages/Symptoms.aspx

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 19:03

Do you think I have the starts of it then? I hve still been functioning normal but not felt like doing so because of my depersonalisation/derealisation. I spoke to my doctor earlier ad she said i absolutely do not have schizophrenia or show any of the signs he just said I have strong anxiety but do you think I could hve the very early stages? x

Carys

03-01-12, 19:08

NO NO NO ! You are not schizophrenic. NOTHING you have said in any of your posts in all these weeks gives any indication of this illness. You need to accept that you have anxiety, only then can you start losing the fear of it.

:yesyes:

---------- Post added at 19:08 ---------- Previous post was at 19:05 ----------

do you think I could hve the very early stages?

Nope. 100 %

I've never met you, but we have 'talked' on various topics on this forum. You know that so much of your story reminds me of myself many years ago. I recognise everything you talk about, all the fears, all the 'tricks' your anxiety is playing on you, and this latest 'schizophrenia fear' is no different.

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 19:11

I've been naughty and I've been googling again an completely convinced myself I either hve it or hve the early stages because just recently I've been forgetting things, felt like im in my own world, found it hard to make decisions, everything has felt surreal, I have felt detactched from everyone and everything :/ is this anxiety or have I actually got schizophrenia? My doctor said tht I haven't it's just strong anxiety but I'm so worried I've got the early stages :/ and when I speak to her I forget to tell her things and then beat myself up because I feel like she's not getting the full picture if I don't tell her everything :/ xx

nomorepanic

03-01-12, 19:24

Please listen to us and especially me as I work with someone with it as I said - YOU DO NOT HAVE IT.

Stop googling as well - you will always find something if you look hard enough.

Carys

03-01-12, 19:25

Panicliss, listen....

Everything you are talking about 'forgetting things', 'getting muddled', 'being confused', 'feeling like you are in your own world', 'finding making decisions hard' etc. etc. are symptoms of an extreme and deep anxiety state. Even the very fact that you find yourself unable to accept that fact points to being another symptom of an extreme anxiety state. As you know I have been hopsitalised from anxiety twice (ok, so not recently, but boy can I remember it all very clearly!)

You are terrifying yourself, and are so locked into your fear that I think nothing anybody says at this point in time will reassure you. You are busily convincing yourself of having this other condition. However, I do want to reiterate, it is blindingly obvious when someone has schizophrenia and you do not have it ! I too have personal experience of schizophrenia, not me but others I have known well.

mikewales

03-01-12, 19:34

All your symptoms are classic anxiety, not schizophrenia, plus your doctor has already told you you don't have it. Google can't diagnose you, and will tell you you have anything from a splinter to being dead for most symptoms you put in.

What you do need to do is get some help for your anxiety, go and see your GP, there is medication and therapy available that should really help you with these thoughts.

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 19:37

mikewales

03-01-12, 19:44

Thats ok, its good you are getting some help sorted out, hopefully this will help you to change your thinking and not obsess over things as much.

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 19:49

I have got much better than I was because I've been using cbt techniques and been keeping myself busy, before I wasn't even functioning I couldn't eat, sleep, shower but now I do all of those things without thinking and more.. I've been going into shops now and I've been planning on getting my car back on the road to give myself some more freedom but it's just that I constantly have the feeling I've got sonething wrong with me wether it's a brain tumour or schizophrenia and I think that's what I need help with, so tht I don't even have those thoughts in the 1st place, my gp thinks I should go on medication but I'm so so terrified but I'm gonna wait to see what the psychiatrist suggests next week xx

Carys

03-01-12, 20:24

I'm sorry I'm just so worried that's all, I can't get it off my mind, earlier I felt completely normal and even that freaked me out! Thankyou for all your comments and advice, I do think that I haven't got schizophrenia but then I get doubted when I have a thought or feeling. You guys say I haven't got it, my family says I haven't got it, my gp says I hvent got it, a mental health crisis team said I hadnt got it but I'm sure you guys know that when you think you have something you completely home in on it and it becomes your life. I've got my 1st appointment with a psychiatrist next week who is going to diagnose me and discuss my treatment and recovery plan. My gp said to me that people with health anxiety read things or think things and ten research and almost make themselves have all of the symptoms and that's what she has said I have done throughout all my anxiety so I suppose that I've done it again but just with schizophrenia this time instead of a brain tumour or ms.. Thanks again guys and I'm sorry of it seems like I wasn't listening I was just so so worried xxxxxx There we go, there is the post of a NOT crazy person ! :roflmao: Well written, logical, factual (remembering dates, times and places !!!), clearly able to remember how to spell words etc. AND you are starting to rationalise things as well !!! :yesyes:

It sounds like there are going to be some really positive changes for you Panicliss, based on all you have said about the health care team that are supporting you.

Hey, listen, you don't need to apologise, honestly. I spent months once unable to accept what everyone around me said, I was utterly and entirely convinced death was imminent, nothing anybody said could penetrate the fear I had created. I wrote 'goodbye letters', and in them I forgave people for not realising I was dying and ignoring all my assertions. I felt utterly frustrated that nobody could see what the truth was, that I was incredibly ill. I ended up even being unable to use one side of my body, through the 'power' of negative thought. I was the proverbial brick wall, nobody could get through to me despite professional reassurance and family reassurance, so, you are doing really really well to be able to start analysing what is really going on here. GO girl !

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 20:57

Thankyou so much! You have all just made my day :) guess as an anxiety sufferer you don't see all the good things. But the power of the mind is incredible, you're right carys and I'm the same as you was.. Convinced there's something really wrong with me but people not knowing. How did you get through it? Thankyou so much for your comment xxx

Carys

03-01-12, 22:12

How did I get through it ? I didn't die :roflmao:...and it was so many times that I didn't die and wasn't eventually ill at all......that it got a bit boring and repetitive. So, I figured that I had been wrong after all and all the symptoms started to resolve. :roflmao:

Well, that was part of it. I read about anxiety (days before the internet, it had to be actual books lol) and then decided that I 'might' have anxiety problems, but, in my emotional exhaustion I decided, that if I was going to die I might as well enjoy my last few hours/days by interacting with people and giving a little joy to others. This helped me focus externally, rather than on my internal struggles and as distraction started working symptoms got less and less and I felt engaged with the world around me. Then as symptoms improved slightly I started being able to reassure myself about things.There is no guaranteed answer though really, different people have different needs and what was my way out may be different to yours.

Heres the thing Panicliss, it takes time to come out of these severe anxiety states. Don't expect to feel ok tomorrow,or the next day, but rest assured that it will happen and you will learn from the experience and be stronger next time you have these feelings. You have the key to helping yourself, trust me. Be strong :o)

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 22:26

I don't seem to be thinking about dying anymore my main focus at the minute seems to be the whole schizophrenia/psychosis/ going crazy thing. That's my main worry but you're right I got over the whole collapsing/weak legs thing cause I realised I was wrong and it wasn't gonna happen, I'm hoping that's gonna be the same for the going crazy thing Xx

Carys

03-01-12, 22:43

I came back to the thread to add about just what you have mentioned above.... going crazy...that didn't happen either.

You may well come up with other fears to obsess about, there is a tendency for a new one to be created when the old one is worn out, but same thing applies........it is not going to happen, because it is anxiety causing fear. Isn't that good news, you arent ill and you aren't going mad...it is 'just' anxiety ?

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 22:56

I try to keep myself busy and distracted but as soon as I sit down and get a second to think it all comes flooding to me. "the world doesn't feel real" "I don't feel real" "I'm going crazy I must be" I sit there an test my memory and my thoughts. It's awful. I feel like I'm in a dream and I sit there and think did that really happen or am I dreaming and that's when I think I'm schizophrenic because I know one of the symptoms is not being able to distinguish between dreams and reality but then again I know that the dreamy feeling is part of derealisation and anxiety. Im just fed up of not feeling normal and then freaking out when I do feel normal and then sitting there and thinking well what is normal? It's like can anxiety really do this!? Did you ever get any scary thoughts of you going crazy and losing control? I'm scared I will become like trapped in my own body of you know what I mean like I will go crazy and lose control and not know what I'm doing anymore and being aware that's what's happening and not being able to escape it.. Tht probabaly sounds really crazy :/ I suppose it just all comes down to losing control because when I'm scared of having a brain tumour I get scare I'm gonna lose control of my bodily functions etc.. Isn't anxiety an awful thing :/ xx

nomorepanic

03-01-12, 22:58

Hi panic - do you work at all?

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 23:06

No I don't work or anything xx

nomorepanic

03-01-12, 23:17

Can I ask why not?

I think if you had something to concentrate on then you would not spend so much time worrying about your health. The more free time you have to think about these things the worse they get.

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 23:20

I actually don't know :/ I think because I'm so scared and I even struggle to go into shops sometimes and I find it really hard to be on my own and I don't know how I'd cope of I had any of these feelings at work :/ I'm planning in doing voluntary in February at the school my mum works out to get me used to a working environment xx

nomorepanic

03-01-12, 23:27

Being at work and having these feelings is no different to being at home and having them but you get paid for it lol.

You learn to cope and you learn to ignore them in the end cos they can't harm you at all.

Does your mum and dad support you financially then?

Paniclissx

03-01-12, 23:43

Yeah I do see what you're saying but I'm just scared of how I will cope that's all and yeah they do, although I don't really need supporting at the minute because I have nothing to pay for or anything but they help me out when I need the money :)

Is it normal with anxiety to feel a bit odd when not feeling anxious.. It just feels so weird to not be anxious.. Usually I think about the doctors all day long and I take a tablet for dizziness just incase I get dizzy (I haven't done that today) and I haven't thought about googling as much as I usually do either.. Feels like there's sonething wrong with me because I don't feel anxious at all xx

nomorepanic

03-01-12, 23:59

Please don't self analyse all the time. It is almost as though you want there to be a problem and you want to feel ill or you worry because you don't.

Enoy it and work on it so you can get out to work and look after yourself and support yourself.

Trust me you do not want to have a serious illness to live with (like many of us do on here) so enjoy your life whilst you are young and carefree.

Paniclissx

04-01-12, 09:28

This morning I have woken up where I literally can't think.. Good or bad thoughts, does that mean I'm crazy because I'm in a daze? I feel like I'm trapped in someone else's body, everything seems strange, it's like I feel normal but why do I feel normal is it because I'm schizophrenic and that it wants me to feel normal so that other people don't know I've got it ? Sounds Crazy I know .. :/ I just want to feel normal and not have to question it.. It's so weird because I'm not anxious at all, infact I'm quite carefree and the thoughts I've usually had everyday for the past week I haven't got anymore :s what's wrong with me? xx

---------- Post added at 09:28 ---------- Previous post was at 09:23 ----------

My mind is literally blank I can't think anything at all :/ what's wrong with me? I just can't think. Is it because I'm schizophrenic because people with schizophrenia can't think and are in a world of their own and thts how I feel. I feel like I can't even test my thoughts to see wether I'm crazy or not.. I ask myself... Do I think people are out to get me and I can't even think about it to answer it ! What's wrong with me? xx

Carys

04-01-12, 09:43

What's wrong with me?

You can answer this question yourself Panicliss....go on.....give it a go......

Paniclissx

04-01-12, 09:47

I don't know :/ maybe because my depersonalisation / derealisation has took a bit of a backseat and most of the intense feelings have gone.. That's all I can think of :/ xx

Carys

04-01-12, 11:44

Ok, I will help you then.....but last night, if you read this thread back, you were aware of what the real problem was....

You 'feel in a world of your own' because you are in a deep severe anxiety state. You are totally and utterly focused on every single thought you have and physical feeling, your brain doesn't have time to 'get a word in edgeways' with any other thought or feeling because you are convincing yourself that you are either going crazy or have some other illness.

Nicola is right about working. Maybe you aren't ready for full-time employment, that is scary for you and feels impossible right now, but some time with distraction in a different environment is what you desperately need.

---------- Post added at 11:44 ---------- Previous post was at 11:22 ----------

What interests you Panicliss, or rather what did interest you in the past ? What are you good at ? What do you like ...animals, music, art/craft, gardening, cooking ?

nomorepanic

04-01-12, 15:06

Are you getting any help like therapy? Have you read any good books like Claire Weekes?

Paniclissx

04-01-12, 16:00

Okay so today aw interesting and has convinced me even more that I'm schizophrenic.. I went to see my therapist today (we are paying private whilst on an nhs waiting list) an we did an exercise and i opened my eyes from finishing the exercise and I completely and I was like who are you why should I trust you and she offered me water and I thought she was going to poison me (i don't think that now of course) but I thought everyone was lying to me just to make me feel better and to shut me up and it's really worried me that I am actually schizophrenic, my therapist and my mum both said tht it was a bad panic attack based on derealisation an unreal feelings, like questioning wether we are really here and not recognising what's around you etc.. I told her all my fears of schizophrenia and she said absolutely not (I don't have it) she said that she'd worked with people who have it and I'm not even like them one bit (not even when I was freaking out!) I just suddenly thought who are you and why should I trust what your saying. Does anyone else get this? I'm paying private for her and it's at her house and I hat suddenly thought oh my god who are you.. I have had many sessions with her before and she was my mums therapist too... But because I've had these thoughts and feelings does it mean I'm schizophrenic? xx

nomorepanic

04-01-12, 16:07

I keep saying you are not schizophrenic but until you believe it then I am probably wasting my time keep saying it aren't I?

Loads of people have told you that you aren't so why can't you believe us or are you just trying to find a label that fits?

Paniclissx

04-01-12, 16:21

I'm sorry it's just wht happened to me today has never ever happened to me before and It scared me to death, I just felt like everyone, even my own family were strangers and I felt like I couldn't trust anyone, it was the scariest thing I've ever been through with my anxiety. I'm sorry if it seems like I'm not listening, I really am I just find it hard to accept when I believe that it's true. I'm really sorry :(

Carys

04-01-12, 16:42

Even a mental health professional who can recognise psychotic conditions says you have severe anxiety, and nothing more. If you won't believe them at the moment, then I guess you certainly won't believe us at the moment. Only when you come out of this the other end, will you realise quite how you are driving yourself into a desperate state of anxiety. I know you believe what you are thinking is true, I know it feels totally real, but you are being tricked by anxiety.

As I said to you earlier in this thread I truly recognise where you are at. I once spent weeks not believing people, professionals, family, friends, I was utterly and totally convinced of something. I even had paranoid thoughts, like the ones you are having now, and yes I even went through the 'I'm schizophrenic' stage !!!

NOTHING that you have stated in any of your posts in the last few weeks makes me think of anything other than anxiety. I know this, I have been there.

You are posting on a site called 'No more panic', and everyone understands and can relate to your symptoms. You need to start accepting what is happening here Panicliss, start reassuring yourself, start reading all the advice you have here over and over and over again.....if you want to get better quicker ?

---------- Post added at 16:42 ---------- Previous post was at 16:39 ----------

I just felt like everyone, even my own family were strangersYep, not surprised by this at all, the heightened state you are in at the moment.

The brain is incredibly powerful. There are people out there who have used the power of positive thought to change their own heart rates, recover from serious illnesses and carry out superhuman feats. Think of that power of thought focused on negative things instead.........that is what you are doing right now.....

Paniclissx

04-01-12, 16:51

i suppose its just like every other worry ive had.. i thought and was totally convinced that i had a brain tumour three weeks ago and no matter what anyone said i didnt believe them at all because i was having all these symptoms that wernt going away. i still get those same symptoms but i dont seem to worry about them because at the moment my main focus is thinking that im schizophrenic. i worry that i will wake up one morning having suddenly developed it over night. At the minute i cant think straight, im in a world of my own, i keep forgetting things. for example, we were at my grandmas earlier and my dad said that we were stopping off at someones house on the way home and then we all got into the car and it was only until he went a different way home that i had realised where we were going. i told my therapist my memory is awful and she said its normal with stress. i get the sort of feeling that ive forgot something... but i get it constantly. I went for a walk with my mum earlier and i was in a complete daze stood at the lights and sort of forgot to cross the road until my mum started to cross it. my head just feels all muddled and all hazy and all over the place at the minute.. i dont know wether im coming or going.. its awful. Alongside being terrified that ive got schizophrenia, i get scared im gonna lose all my functions.. like forget how to spell, eat, walk, talk etc and forget how to funtion within life. im a complete mess at the minute, my dad just walked into the door and everyone started laughing and it just comopletely freaked meout and i felt like crying.. :( i HATE this.. xx

PanchoGoz

04-01-12, 16:58

I think you know that nobody here will be able to reassure you as that is your mind set. We know full well you will not get schizophrenia, but if we can't help you, there isn't much point in posting more about it because someone won't just come up with the perfect post that solves the problem for you.
Your anxious mind is in control, you need to ignore it and carry on with life.

Paniclissx

04-01-12, 17:40

All of your comments and advice really do help me, but im sure you know what its like, its so hard to believe what people are saying when you are so totally convinced. Im so sorry :(

Carys

04-01-12, 17:47

Yes, I do know what its like, but trust me no matter what we say, no matter how much reassurance we give or how many people give it.....

.....only YOU can make the difference here. Only YOU can accept your condition. If you don't, then tomorrow there will be something else causing you to freak out, and next week something else and so on...always something new.

I know why you are finding this almost impossible to accept what anxiety is doing to you at the moment. It all feels very very real, you are scared to the bottom of your very being (if that is a phrase that makes sense lol) and it is inconceivable to your exhausted mind that 'just anxiety' could be causing all these various and multitudinal symptoms.

BUT, it is......so don't waste time when you could be recovering looking for another medical diagnosis, you already have one !

Paniclissx

04-01-12, 19:17

i know, its just so so so hard :( especially when the depersonalisation/derealisation kicks in... that makes it 10x worse :/ im going to a friends house tomorrow.. for the 1st time in months without my mum.. im nervous as hell :/ im going there just after lunch time and i will be having dinner there.. eeeeee. xx

---------- Post added at 19:17 ---------- Previous post was at 17:51 ----------

Youre all gonna be mad with me... but ive been researching on google and severe anxiety and stress can bring on psychosis.. im so scared thats what im doing and thats what ive got and that im gonna lose control :( :( :(

nomorepanic

04-01-12, 19:26

Read the article on here:

http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/articles/research/

The second bit about neurosis

Also stop googling cos you are not doing yourself any favours.

You need to read positive things not things that are yet again confirming that you are going mad

Paniclissx

04-01-12, 19:34

"Other sufferers of anxiety (in all its shapes and forms)fear that their anxiety may progress to madness and they may end up being locked away in aninstitution. Indeed, some mental health professionals perpetrate the idea that serious mentalillness, such as schizophrenia or manic depression can develop from an anxiety state."

so does this mean that my anxiety CAN progress into psychosis or schizophrenia?

sorry im just trying to understand the statement xx

Scared_11

04-01-12, 19:46

My advise would be to stop googling! I have done this plenty of times and it's just going to make you feel worse!

I have been through the same thing and it is very scary but after I had some counselling seasons I began to come out of it! U just nee to give it some time and put abit of effort it. If u want to google anything google OCD and anxiety and read other peoples posts on here that have been through the same thing.

We know how low u can get and believe me I have been there but it will pass eventually if u learn to see ur thoughts as just horrible thoughts and worries that come up now and then.

about 6 months ago I was consumed with the worry that I was going crazy or that I was going to develop severe depression and my counsellor told me that there is absolutely nothing you can do to bring these things on urself. Imaging that u have a mental problem is like imaging u have a physical illness. Just because u think it, it doesn't mean it's going to happen.

I hope u start to feel better soon, u will with time!! U will start to see that after being this low and worried u haven't developed psychosis and the fear will ease off! I still have the worries at times but thy don't last as long.

CBT and mindfulness meditation are realy good and if u stick with them u will see a change in urself! And after it all u will know how ur brain works and will know urself and how u react more and therefore u will be able to notice when u are worrying irrationally.

Take care xx

---------- Post added at 19:46 ---------- Previous post was at 19:37 ----------

I would not trust every source on the Internet as anyone can write anything for us to read on the Internet. Someone could write 'anxiety can in some cases can cause u to turn into a cat' of course we know that this is not possible and so don't believe everything u read. The statement is written on what some people may 'believe' but u have to question who these people are.

I would trust the majority of ht the Internet and most professionals state and that is that anxiety an not cause a more serious mental illness. It will just take up ur time and cause u distress and anger and fear. All horrible things.

I have researched this a lot in the past and it is a very common obsession for many anxiety suffers.

Paniclissx

04-01-12, 19:46

thankyou :) i seem to be okay when i keep myself busy.. its just all the invading thoughts and feelings, they really make me feel like ive got schizophrenia :/ really glad you are coping with it better :)

thanks to nicola i found this..

"Although, some people withschizophrenia suffer anxiety, it is impossible for people with anxiety disorders to developschizophrenia as a result of anxiety disorder. Anxiety sufferers should be reassured that theycannot develop schizophrenia as part of anxiety state, no matter how bad anxiety becomes.
The symptoms of schizophrenia and thedeteriorating course can be linked to changes in brain structure and functioning, which areentirely different to those associated with anxiety."

xx

Scared_11

04-01-12, 19:54

Keeping yourself busy and distracted is the thing. I j ow sometimes it's the last thing u want to do because alls u feel like doing is sitting and worrying and feeling down but just keeping trying to do things and allow other things I take up your time,.

I read that you don't work and I think that this is just giving u time to worry and think. My anxiety is always at it worst in stages when I don't have much to do. If u do some volunteer work this will help distract you and also try to exercise if u can.

My councillor recommended Mindfulness Medication and I find once u get into it it can work wonders, especially for mental health worries! Read up on that in the Internet there are a lot of positive stories about it. It takes some time and effort but definitely worth it. I got a book with a CD to listen to and with the help from my councillor I began to get into it about 4 weeks in.

Paniclissx

04-01-12, 20:42

yeah i do really try to keep busy because if i dont i just lay there and find it impossible to move from my bed because my thoughts take a hold of me..

id planned to do voluntry at a school reading with children after february half term just for like an hour or so once or twice a week to start off with :)

and ooh i will research that, what is it?

every thought i get im convinced its schizophrenia

i get thoughts and feeings such as
- not feeling as though the world is real
- not feeling that i am real
- really bad memory
- forgetting things
- feeling out of reality
- feeling detatched
- cant think clearly, mind going blank etcc

i know that these symptoms are part of depersonalisation / derealisation but i just get so worried and become obsessive over my thoughts and feelings. like, i know that schizophrenia can be caused from loss or bereavement and loss and bereavement is what has caused all my anxiety in the 1st place! but then from the information on this site it says that anxiety is not the cause of schizophrenia. i just worry that ive got the very early stages of it because they are really hard to recognise by others. i guess this is just another one of my many worries! - like ive said before.. xx

Scared_11

04-01-12, 21:00

I have said all the same things!! I am much better now I was at my lowest around April/May and it's sounds like that's we're u are now!

I have health anxiety and OCD an this episode in the past year has been focused on worrying bout my mental health! It had been the most scary 8 months of my life and do I understand the things u are feeling. I know depersonalisation is just an anxiety symptom that comes with the tester at of the symptoms.

Mindfulness meditation is a series of exercises that focus on the here and now and it will help u to see ur thoughts as just thoughts or 'mental events' that come and go like clouds! Thoughts are not a reflection of you or what is going to happen to you, the are just little idea that come and go constantly. Mindfulness mediation is there to help u relate to this and when u give it time and read up about it it realy helps.

My worries this year have been:

I am going to make myself crazy
I am going to develop bi polar
I am going to become so disconnected with the world and my family that I will want to kill myself
I am never going to get better
I am going to develop morbid jealousy

I have wasted hours and hours of my year worrying myself sick about all these things and more but I am much better now and u will be too. I didn't have any medication, I just got some self help books, had 10 councilling sessions, tried to keep myself busy and read all I could about anxiety and OCD. It's takes some work but it will get better.

---------- Post added at 21:00 ---------- Previous post was at 20:58 ----------

I also had trouble concentrating, remembering and focusing on anything else apart from myself. I was constantly analysing everything I was doing and feeling. But it is possible to stop that. I never ever thought it was but it is.