What am I supposed to do?

[sophiethestar]

I'm a 19 year old student training to be a teacher, so most of the time I live close to my university, but I come home some weekends and I'm at home now because of the Christmas break. Today my Dad told me that he's buying a house with his girlfriend. The way he was talking about it seemed as if I'm not included in this, like the house is a small one-bedroomed house. At the moment I'm in university accommodation and I have to leave at the end of June. I have a house arranged for the next academic year but I can't move into that until September. When my Dad was talking about his new living arrangements I didn't want to ask where I'd go because I thought I'd sound selfish. I know it sounds like I'm being petty but I'm actually worried. If he moves when I'm university and I visit to him one weekend it will just be a 'visit', and not feel as if I'm coming home. Maybe I'm worrying over nothing? Any advice would be appreciated.

[lins13]

just sit down and ask him outright, 'do u have a bedroom when he buys this new house'. He cant just leave you out in the cold.

[william wallace]

Hi Sophie.
I'm in a similar position in that I'm a 55 year old dad with a daughter of 25 staying at home. I've been married to Mrs Wallace for 35 years and we had a wee cottage in a rural location in Angus, Scotland. We recently moved house to a small town called Forfar. Around the time we were house hunting, our daughter returned from a few months in the US where she had been working with Camp America, and came to live with us. We could have taken a one bedroomed house for about £350 per month but as our daughter was coming to live with us we took a two bedroomed house at £550 per month. She recently met a very nice young fellow and is already talking about moving in with him. This kind of leaves us in a financial mess as we cant really afford the higher rent without her contribution ie £200 per month board money, which incidentally doesnt come close to an equal share of the cost of living here.
I can see where your dad is coming from due to the fact that you dont live with him permanently. If he and his partner were to buy a two bedroomed house to accomodate you when you are'nt at uni it would set them back another say, £50,000.
In my view, not a good investment. I'm sure he/they will not mind having you kip on their sofa for the odd night, but it looks as though you might have to face the fact that you're a big girl now, and have to stand on your own two feet.
All the best Sophie, and hope I have'nt offended you:)

[Magic]

In a way lins 13 is right. No harm in asking.
On the other hand-- so is ww.
One off our daughers left for uni and never came back to live at ours. She went to live where she found her job,
Our other daughter came home from college after we had spent a substantial amount of money on the bedroom the two girls shared when at home ---just for her---when she decided she was getting married and went.
Don't worry so much Sophie. I'm sure your dad will have room for you. No one knows what will happen in the future, thing are changing all the time.
Take care x

[mikewales]

I would agree, ask him, it does sound like his is planning more on it being 'him and his girlfriends' house which is quite understandable as they probably want time together, but for weekend visits I'm sure he can sort out a sofa bed for you.

Remember you are an adult now, and once you finish uni and start work, its time to make your own way in the world, and rent your own place. Also, as you are qualifying as a teacher, you may well find you have to move to get work anyway as lots of areas really don't have any jobs going ( particularly in primary schools ).