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Paniclissx
08-01-12, 13:21
How do you guys feel with your depersonalisation/derealisation? I'm kinda freaking out and convincing myself I'm going crazy... xx

quickman
08-01-12, 13:28
Sight slightly blurry, light headed and dizzy...?

Just hang tight, take a seat and try a glass of water :) Or teat and toast as sokeone else here recommended!

xhyperyogix
08-01-12, 13:57
my body and mind are dissconnected, and they'll never get back together.

i'm not here and nor is anything else; everything is nothing / nothing is everything

sometimes a welcome playground in whcih to hide from reality

or a fully-functioning self-customised paralell-dimention version of your worst nightmares.

PS when asked a question by a therapist I once replied 'everything and nothing'. at the time it made perfect sense to me, but it didn't go down too well with the nhs!!

hyper xx

Paniclissx
08-01-12, 14:03
I feel the same, I'm scared I'm gonna lose control, go crazy and throw myself off a building or something and not know it or be in control of it :/ what did the nhs say? xx

xhyperyogix
08-01-12, 14:28
yeah i sometimes think i can't go near windows / train platform edges as i think i'll not be able to stop myself jumping.

tbh, the nhs discharged me saying they didn't do long term therapy. i have a private councsellor. she has helped me alot.

i always hold onto:
1) physical things like actually touch and feel my wooden floor,
2) run about in circles to get my body in touch with my brain or my favourite over the last few days as i've been home alone (self imposed since anx has been all over the place),
3) i talk to myself. as in, 'now, hyper, we are going to get up and move away from the bed, - yes, that's it, it's not that bad is it? yes, you will be ok, because you know you always are, and this won't kill you. Ok, so now we are touching the door, and going through it.....' you get the picture, i talk myself through everything. i sound mad but it helps loads. if it helps and there is no-one around, then i shout at myslef too!!!!!
4) these are the conventional more preventative things as i see it (the top three are crisis mode)
a) yoga - breathing meditation, and postures (i teach this actually as a job)
b) do do do - talk to people, engage in reality
c) any physical activity
d) contact - human touch / hug a pet etc...

Hope it helps you too. it's just what i do. i've had it for 20 years, so tbh most of the time ive been told i'm pretty dissconnected, just in the 'nice place', not the hell!

lots of love and 'grounding'...... hyper xxxx

Paniclissx
08-01-12, 14:32
That's really useful thankyou :) I'm just scared I'm gonna lose my mind and do something crazy.. Is this anxiety? Who told you you were disconnected, what do you mean? Xxx

xhyperyogix
08-01-12, 14:43
my doc and counsellor... the dp/dr thing is part of something called dissociation. it's part of anxiety and also the brains way of self protection when in trauma (say e.g you witness a car crash etc). The brain goes - well, this is overload (whatever the sourse - trauma or anx making normal things in trauma level) and shuts down to a point. Bit like when my laptop restarts by itself as i never turn it off myself. it needs rest and time to install updates etc.

hope that helps. been v diss. so brain is able to function great but only on very linear levels (e;g hooked up an entire home cinema system but can't talk to my mum!!)

brains are odd but glad we have them!!

hyper xx

Paniclissx
08-01-12, 15:00
Ahh thankyou for explaining, that makes sense :) weird how the brain works though! I have heard that DP /DR is our brains way of protecting us... Is it dangerous though? Or just part of anxiety? I'm just worried its because there's sonething more serious wrong with me .. xx

xhyperyogix
08-01-12, 15:08
you already said it - the brain is protecting us (from extreme trauma) - so not dangerous at all. just not a required state to be in for day to day life!!

and there is nothing seriously wrong with you xxx

Paniclissx
08-01-12, 15:45
I just get worried that I will forget how to function and I will completely lose touch with reality and I will forget who I am and who my family are etc... :( xx

EmmerLooeez
08-01-12, 17:49
I don't seem to experience it as bad as other people, mine only happens after I've had a rough patch with my anxiety. I find if I focus on it, it makes it worse.

Hyper's pretty much said everything I do to help. The main one for me is feeling things to feel like I'm actually here - does that make any sense? I feel worse when I've woken up on a morning so I usually sit on my front step and have my morning cup of tea - the step's rough concrete and I find that running my fingers along it and taking note of everything that I'm feeling helps me to come to 'one' with my body.

witsend
09-01-12, 01:11
Depersonalisation is the worst symptom of anxiety because you don't feel like a real person, let alone yourself. I once took on a mugger in that state because i had no awareness of myself, or the risk. If i ever commit suicide, it'll be a sudden decision brought on my depersonalisation. It's dangerous stuff.