How sympathetic is your GP?

[StressCase]

My anxiety is terrible at the moment. Tomorrow I have a GP appointment because my GP asked me to come back for some tests (that didn't help my anxiety) and now I have started to add other symptoms that have been looked at before and worry that because they haven't cleared up that they are related and I'm basically panicking.

I'm wondering (as I have a double appointment) whether I should pluck up the courage to not only talk about the other symptoms that are troubling me but to also explain about my anxiety and how it is affecting me.

I have always been too scared to do this because I didn't know how my GP would react - I always think they must hate people like me who waste their time over silly worries (although they don't feel silly to me!).

I also think that when I say it all out loud to my GP, I will burst into tears because of all the emotions I'm holding on to. The other reason I didn't want to tell my GP was that I thought they would put it on my notes and no doctor would take any symptom I have seriously and then I would never feel any reassurance from anything they say to me. But, I think I've got to the stage where I don't get much reassurance from the doctor anyway so I've got nothing to lose.

But I'm still a bit nervous about doing it tomorrow. If you've spoken to your doctor, how did you start the conversation, what did you say and how did they react?

Thanks

SC

[bettykitten]

I started the conversation by practically taking the door off the hinges and wailing on his desk (convinced myself I had ovarian cancer)

He took me very seriously (as in my anxiety about my health), examined my pelvic area, said he wasn't remotely concerned but he would send me for the relevant tests for my peace of mind and offered me beta-blockers/sertraline/cbt.

if you don't tell your doctor it will come to a head and you'll have a situation like I did where it all gets too much, you ring the surgery demanding to be seen NOW and end up a wreck in the surgery. Talk it through with your GP :)

[Greenman50]

You might be best writeing it all down before you go in , i can assure you they see peeps everyday like us who are in a bad place .

How did i tell my doctor about my concerns.....i burst into tears and she passed me the tissue box , i was rather embarsed being male but i didn,t understand that i was getting so low (depressed) and anxiuos about an on going health problem , which had actually gone and the anxiety had kicked off this awefull depression and other symtoms. Thankfully she put me on citralapram and i,m much better .

Yes ....discuss in length your concerns etc..
:hugs:

[bignik]

My GP very good , if I have a bad day a simple call and he says come on down , usually when you call normally 2-3 weeks to get an appointment but he is aware Im very fragile at the moment so very understanding, I find the more open you are with them without being demanding the better they are

[miss_t]

My GP has had a sympathy bypass - he has the bedside manner of a bag of coal.

Heartless bugger he is. I won't see him unless there is nobody else.

If you have a double appointment booked, definately mention how you're feeling. I know it can be difficult, but I always start by saying "well firstly...." so that the GP I'm seeing knows there's more than one issue I want to discuss.

Honestly, it's a double appointment (akin to gold dust at my surgery) make the most of it

Good luck x

[StressCase]

Thanks for the replies, they're very encouraging.

I may write something down - that's a good idea. And, I will let her know at the start of the appointment that I've not just come for the tests.

My last appointment only lasted 5 mins - I was just told to book a double appointment and come back for tests so I think I'm owed a bit of time.
Despite all my anxiety, I do try to limit the amount of times I visit the GP, partly because I find I get very anxious waiting for an appointment and partly because I really care about what people think of me and I couldn't bear to think that the receptionists are gossiping about me because I'm there all the time. Then I worry that I've allowed a symptom to go on for too long before seeing a doctor and that makes my anxiety worse! So I hope my GP doesn't think too badly of me at this stage, but who knows what she will think of me after I tell her what goes on in my head.

Here's hoping that my GP will be nice. I'll let you know how I get on.

[Acidomoduso]

I wrote a list of ailments and worries and explained about health anxiety to the doctor I saw (not my normal Doctor... he's known as "Dr Fresh Air" because he tells you to stop smoking and/or get some fresh air). I think i even printed off the list of HA symptoms from this site and ticked the ones i felt. She understood, checked me out, reassured me and applied for the CBT course. She kept the sheets of paper to send to the CBT team. Write them down - they take you more seriously.

On a related not to the OP...one of the doctors once told me off for wasting an emergency appointment. I actually said to him... "Well, if you don't want to see me then i'll go". He quickly backtracked but chuntered all the way through the examination. Strangely, i'm awaiting x-rays for the vary same pain, and this was in 2009.

[countrygirl]

Having worked at a Drs surgery and having health anxiety I have seen both sides. Drs are not mind readers and as one said to me how can I know you are worrying about ovarian cancer say when you have not a single clinical symptom of it to me if you don't tel me, once you tell me then I can explain why I think you are wrong to worry about it. Perfect sense really!

Most Drs would rather you admitted to the anxiety as they often know exactly how bad you are but don't want to say anything as lots of patients would take offence at being told they have a mental illness.

Admitted ha patients do get labelled by Drs as "heart sink" as thier hearts sink as we come through the door as we don't believe a word they say:blush:. One Dr friend said how would you feel if you had trained for 8 years practised for 20 and then have a patient totally disbelieve you every time they come when you say they do not have a brain tumour or whatever and will only believe me after a brain scan etc Again understandable from the Drs point of view. This was from a Dr who was very sympathetic to HA.

Best thing to do is write it all down so you don't have to speak and set off the :weep:. Then work out a management plan with your Dr. This worked very well for me. I explain my symptoms but also what I am worrying about and the Dr takes it from there.

If you have a totally unsypathetic Dr then change, even ask another practise if you can talk to a Dr before you register due to a mental health issue as having a sympathetic Dr is all and an unsypathetic one will make you million times worse.

I found the most unsypathetic people were the surgery staff, when I worked at one I kept very quiet about my ha as the practise manager was really horrible about a couple of patients that obviously to me had bad ha but I was especially nice to them:yesyes:

[Dreamalittledream]

When I first told my GP I took my husband along so I wouldnt back out of telling her that I thought I had health anxiety...of course me bursting into tears might have given her a clue.

I have to say she has been fabulous and referred me to a great psychologist who really helped, though medication is always there if I need it.

Between the GP, me and the psychologist we also came up some solutions in getting the most out of the times I visit the GP with worries. I no longer get told "it's fine".

I get a full answer of why it is not what I am worrying about (which I also get asked about for any symptoms I am presenting with).

I also make sure to ask what the expected treatment should do and how long before a treatment or drug should work. I sometimes have to remember to ask what are symptoms of something getting worse.

This is for me though and I do actually have some medical issues so my GP does reassure me about those that she see's me about that they havent developed further problems.

It doesnt mean I don't overreact, the last few days has been a little ick and there has been one Dr google incident after months of not searching. This was also an agreement with the psychologist that I would refrain from that particular vice!

Unfortuantely I ended up in after hours with a bacterial throat infection just days after seeing my dr last...so of course I have in the last few days convinced myself I have rheumatic fever (or will get it) and heart damage, because although I had the antibiotics I got a sore throat again for a few days about a week after the antibiotics finished...OMG stop :doh:


Yes progress can be made with your GP knowing that you have it as above they are not mind readers but can provide a lot better reassurance if they know what you are obessesed and worried about it being. And it is a lot better for you rather than seeing them and still coming away and feeling like that was no answer.

[VioletWings]

I've found a doctor that's been great. I kept going about symptoms like palpitations, so he suspected anxiety from the beginning, but being a thorough doctor (which helps very much!) he sent me for heart and blood tests (more than once)
He understands that I get worried and he never makes me feel bad for coming in. However there is another doctor at the practice that I am convinced doesn't like me! I had the arkward moment of bumping into him on the stairs last time I was at the doctors and gave him a half smile, he just looked at me... with that look.. yeah I am going to try to avoid seeing that one as much as possible! haha.

And yeah.. like everyone's said, write things down (particularly what you are most worried about most of the time)and be completely honest. It really will help them help you.

[swgrl09]

I am a little upset because I finally found a great doctor who was very understanding about the anxiety and good about explaining things to me, but now she is out on an indefinite medical leave! The office doesn't know when she will be back or if she will, I doubt they can say anyway. So I am in a bit of a bind, I have been just going to the other doctors covering her at that office, and they have all been pretty nice. I just was disappointed because I finally had a good doc to talk to about anxiety. it's embarassing having to explain it every time to a new doctor.

[mike_coventry_uk]

My gp surgery I have to say is the best! For example I called up today worried about blood in my phlegm this morning within 2 hours my doc called me and an appointment was made for this afternoon! The doc spent 20 mins calming me down and reassuring me!

There are always 8 docs at my surgery and u are 100 % guaranteed an appointment same day! The doc also referred me to the in house counselling service for cbt which I had weekly and my doc has always supported me with the meds I needed when I was at my worse!

Engleton surgery in Coventry must rank as the best in the city! :)

[blondinou]

I wrote a separate post tonight about studying/working in medicine, have a look... It's common for medical students, doctors and nurses to be scared themselves about their own health. Of course some GPs can't empathise at all worried patients, but you'd be surprised how many of them have had worries just like yours before :-)
Glad you've found a doctor you're happy with !

[Stormsky]

I saw a doctor on tv last week, she said at least 1 person she sees a day is an anxiety issue... so they are more than used to dealing with it now... i write down all my symptons before i go, otherwise i get home and think, oh should have told them that!!

[SomeOddworld]

My GP is very kind and sympathetic, though not to a point where its just being patronizing.

[StressCase]

Well, I saw my GP on Thursday.

I asked if I could talk to her about something else before I had my tests and, although in tears, I did manage to tell her about my general anxiety and then my anxiety about my health and my children's health. She was very understanding and very sympathetic. She got me to fill in some questionnaires about anxiety and depression (I score very highly on anxiety and very low on depression). She also asked to read the notes I had brought with me. She said my notes were very useful and were a very accurate description of anxiety. Her feeling was that my main problem was anxiety and that because my body is in a constant state of fight or flight, my mind is constantly searching for an imminent threat or danger and this is why I get the obsessive thoughts about my health and my children's health because I'm always got a sense of impending danger (any symptom is then blown out of proportion because I start to see that as the imminent threat). This really made sense to me and has really helped to begin understanding myself.

She has referred me for CBT, but has warned me that the waiting list is long. In the meantime, she has recommended a book about anxiety and has also suggested that I have a think about whether I would like a prescription for an SSRI drug. She said the drug will help to make me feel calmer while I wait for my CBT. She also recommended exercise for boosting serotonin levels. She gave me practical advice as well, suggesting that I look at relaxation techniques, work out ways to have some time to myself and look at everything I have to do and work out ways of outsourcing it (getting family involved etc) just to reduce my anxiety levels. She described me as being at full capacity which is common when you have a young family, she said. When my anxiety is very high and I can't relax, she recommended distraction. She was also realistic and said that as I've suffered from anxiety for so long (15 -20 years, and I'm only 31!), I should be aware that getting better would be a long process, but that it was possible.

All in all, she was very understanding and I wish I had done it years ago. We didn't get time to do my tests because of this and she told me to rebook for these. At the same time she said they weren't urgent because she wasn't particularly worried about my symptoms (so that also reassured me).

It was a very positive experience for me and I'm looking forward to starting CBT whenever that might be. My anxiety is still high and health worries haven't gone away but getting a bit of insight into how my brain is working has certainly helped in the sense that understanding it means I have a bit more control of it.

[pinkdove]

I'm so glad it went well for you, i bet you feel better for talking and getting it all of your chest . good luck x

[LuSmith]

Having worked at a Drs surgery and having health anxiety I have seen both sides. Drs are not mind readers and as one said to me how can I know you are worrying about ovarian cancer say when you have not a single clinical symptom of it to me if you don't tel me, once you tell me then I can explain why I think you are wrong to worry about it. Perfect sense really!

Most Drs would rather you admitted to the anxiety as they often know exactly how bad you are but don't want to say anything as lots of patients would take offence at being told they have a mental illness.

Admitted ha patients do get labelled by Drs as "heart sink" as thier hearts sink as we come through the door as we don't believe a word they say:blush:. One Dr friend said how would you feel if you had trained for 8 years practised for 20 and then have a patient totally disbelieve you every time they come when you say they do not have a brain tumour or whatever and will only believe me after a brain scan etc Again understandable from the Drs point of view. This was from a Dr who was very sympathetic to HA.

Best thing to do is write it all down so you don't have to speak and set off the :weep:. Then work out a management plan with your Dr. This worked very well for me. I explain my symptoms but also what I am worrying about and the Dr takes it from there.

If you have a totally unsypathetic Dr then change, even ask another practise if you can talk to a Dr before you register due to a mental health issue as having a sympathetic Dr is all and an unsypathetic one will make you million times worse.

I found the most unsypathetic people were the surgery staff, when I worked at one I kept very quiet about my ha as the practise manager was really horrible about a couple of patients that obviously to me had bad ha but I was especially nice to them:yesyes:

Wow, thats what doctors think? The doctors in my surgery are VERY unsympathetic, and I'm guessing they would be awful concerning someone with HA. Unfortunately they have come around to putting me down as someone with severe severe health anxiety, even though I have awful health problems/symptoms that are painful, not nice and not easy to cope with!

However I've been sent away by my doctors so many times I had to do my own chasing and even emailed a gynaecologist to get myself an appointment as the doctors were not helping me whatsoever. I'm now booked for a proper procedure at hospital next month where I will know my full diagnosis once and for all.

Its not right to not listen to the patient who if they have symptoms and are clearly worried, at least reassure and give piece of mind! Okay, so someone may not have a brain tumour but they could have bad headaches etc which could be just as distressing.

I think the most doctors could do would be to explain WHY something could be this way instead of just handing out medication. And if that doesn't help then to try and figure out what else may help. It is understandable if a patient turns up with absolutely no symptoms to be labeled with health anxiety or even hyphocondria but if they have realistic symptoms that are scary and/or painful then they should always be investigated further.



To the OP - in conclusion what I was trying to say was if you feel one doctor isn't going to be sympathetic then you can always feel free to get a second opinion as you are the patient and its you that needs to feel comfortable. The best thing to do is write down whatever you need to ask or say and take it with you, so you don't forget anything.

Hopefully the doctor will listen and lend you a sympathetic ear and hoping you are okay :hugs:x

---------- Post added at 23:18 ---------- Previous post was at 23:17 ----------


Well, I saw my GP on Thursday.

I asked if I could talk to her about something else before I had my tests and, although in tears, I did manage to tell her about my general anxiety and then my anxiety about my health and my children's health. She was very understanding and very sympathetic. She got me to fill in some questionnaires about anxiety and depression (I score very highly on anxiety and very low on depression). She also asked to read the notes I had brought with me. She said my notes were very useful and were a very accurate description of anxiety. Her feeling was that my main problem was anxiety and that because my body is in a constant state of fight or flight, my mind is constantly searching for an imminent threat or danger and this is why I get the obsessive thoughts about my health and my children's health because I'm always got a sense of impending danger (any symptom is then blown out of proportion because I start to see that as the imminent threat). This really made sense to me and has really helped to begin understanding myself.

She has referred me for CBT, but has warned me that the waiting list is long. In the meantime, she has recommended a book about anxiety and has also suggested that I have a think about whether I would like a prescription for an SSRI drug. She said the drug will help to make me feel calmer while I wait for my CBT. She also recommended exercise for boosting serotonin levels. She gave me practical advice as well, suggesting that I look at relaxation techniques, work out ways to have some time to myself and look at everything I have to do and work out ways of outsourcing it (getting family involved etc) just to reduce my anxiety levels. She described me as being at full capacity which is common when you have a young family, she said. When my anxiety is very high and I can't relax, she recommended distraction. She was also realistic and said that as I've suffered from anxiety for so long (15 -20 years, and I'm only 31!), I should be aware that getting better would be a long process, but that it was possible.

All in all, she was very understanding and I wish I had done it years ago. We didn't get time to do my tests because of this and she told me to rebook for these. At the same time she said they weren't urgent because she wasn't particularly worried about my symptoms (so that also reassured me).

It was a very positive experience for me and I'm looking forward to starting CBT whenever that might be. My anxiety is still high and health worries haven't gone away but getting a bit of insight into how my brain is working has certainly helped in the sense that understanding it means I have a bit more control of it.

Just saw this - I'm so glad you had a good experience and that she helped you. I wish you all the luck with CBT, its proved very helpful to me in the past and you will get something from it :) good luck xx

[Dazza]

I've had mixed experiences with doctors.

When I lived in the UK, I had some terrible doctors, who short of rolling their eyes every time I walked into the surgery, would make me feel like I was wasting their time. Needless to say, I changed surgery by writing to my local health authority and asking to be moved for the above reasons (at the time I was living in Brighton & Hove, were most GP surgeries were full, but the local health authority could 'force' you into a surgery).

They put me in touch with a new doctor, a young German man. He was so great in comparison to my previous doctor. The new doctor understood that I was anxious and would explain in depth why he thought that I didn't have such or such fatal disease or condition. He always said to me that I should go back to him if I had more worries. This level of understanding made me feel comfortable and able to open up to him, and feel like he cared which made me trust him a lot. He also helped me in terms of arranging counselling.

I now live in Vietnam, where counselling and CBT are all but unheard of (there very few here), which is why No More Panic has been such a lifeline for me sometimes. I've been in and out of hospitals since moving here 3 1/2 years ago...the doctors here are generally quite sympathetic, but sometimes their lack of English skills (and my lack of Vietnamese skills) means that I get scared when they say ''take these pills for your HEART DISEASE'' when they actually only mean ''take these pills to calm your palpitations''.

Luckily, I've managed to find a great doctor here. He's originally from Switzerland and works in a local Vietnamese hospital. He's been folllowing my case for more than 2 years. He's tested my body for everything under the sun, from heart disease, to brain tumours, arterial defects, cancers etc etc. He's found nothing. Even when he met me he was cynical about psychosomatic illnesses / brain creating symptoms. But now he admits that he's a believer since meeting me! He's now concluded that I'm a hypocondriac (he said it in a nice, not patronizing way). and that I have an element of OCD / psychosis due to my intrusive thoughts about death and illness. He is great, and always takes his time to explain things when I go in to see him with symptoms... he will always give me relevant tests then explain everything in detail afterward as to why I'm not actually physically ill. So I trust him a lot, even to the point that when he told me 2 months ago that an ECG showed that I have a minor abnormailty in the right side of the electrical system of my heart, and that 50% of people have it, I've not worried about it at all!!

So, in summary.



Open up to your doctor, so he can be better placed to help you (they're not mind readers!)
If you're not happy with GP, then CHANGE to a new one!
Write down symptoms and worries. This will help doctor assess you.

Sorry for the long post, just wanted to share my experiences of this.

Wishing you all good health and peace of mind.

xxx